Anyone else scale their wedding down?

My BFF did, she and her Husband eloped and had 3 people (including me) there it was very special

FH and I originally wanted 30 people or less. My parents encouraged us to invite more people since we'd have a backyard ceremony and reception and a small tent would look funny. So the list was then 75 people. After two weeks of planning we all decided 36 people or less was a fair number and changed our reception plans. We didn't have to change our date since it was a fairly early on decision. I do have to say, I am far more excited now that the wedding number is down!

Oh yea and i wanted our wedding to be really small and then FSIL got engaged and is getting married before us so we kind of got stuck inviting all these cousins of FHs parents so even though we are still only inviting 95 people i wish it was smaller

@Tania - Thank you. I'm happy because I feel like stress is gone. I knew I couldn't stay under our 7k budget and decided if I changed the date I'd spend waaay less money. Plus, I work better under a tight deadline anyways

@Surfergirl86 - That's exactly what I want, it to be special and a celebration of the people who mean the most. We just don't have a lot of people we're extremely close to and as our guest list grew I realized we were inviting a lot of people out of obligation.

@Katherine - Almost date twin! Doesn't it feel like there's a weight off your shoulders? Our decision was early too now I've moved the date up everything is on warp speed mode.

I wish I had.

@Future Mrs. BH, Huge weight off my shoulders! I was so stressed I was about to call the entire thing off or head down to the courthouse even though I knew my parents and FH's parents would have been upset. I'm so glad you feel good about your decision and made it early!

@Future Mrs.B- i am so happy that you are doing what you want! its so exciting. wish i had the balls to say no, this is who we are inviting.

I love my FILs but the only people we invited that i have never met before are FMILs cousins, and i felt bad telling her no

So kewl! So many think that small wedding are for people that dont have money, but i assure you there are many people who could afford a 50k wedding, who choose to do it up small! Im with ya girl, Ive got 37 including me and FH - and if I would have had it my way there would only have been 18 Of us! :-) So, whats the plan now?

We got engaged January of 2014, had a venue booked with a deposit a few days later. Booked our photographer a few weeks after that. Bought my dress in March 2014. Shortly after, we met with linen people, booked a photobooth, DJ, etc. That was all in February - April 2014, then we decided to relax for a while. Visited my sister in Texas in July, and their cheap real estate got us talking about buying a house. We realized it's either have a wedding or buy a house. If we chose wedding, we'd be saving up for another few years, which would be fine but we want to start a family soon and would ideally like to be in a house before doing that.

We are now having a private ceremony with just immediate family in mid-May. I'm still wearing my dress, and we kept our photographer (but nixed the 2nd shooter and won't need a full 10 hours either). He's charging us less due to that. We are still having a party on our original date (June 20), but it's a casual thing. FILs paid for the park pavilion and are paying for the catering, so we still have a large guest list (partially at their request, but we weren't opposed if they were willing to help with the finances of it).

@KTizzle -- that's a really good wedding story! I feel like all brides should hear an account like yours, just to know that this flexibility can open up great options...

@Future Mrs. B -- hurray for cutting down on the stress and costs!! I'm happy for you and FW

@Mrs Cheapskate - We scaled down from about 75 people to 27 people including me and FW. We are still having my Uncle do all the grilling and my Aunt will now be doing the cooking instead of catering. We will have a small ceremony at the beginning but the focus will be more on celebrating our happiness with those we love the most. I've decided on a simpler dress and we're each only having two people on each side of us during our ceremony. We're still doing Redneck Classy on a much smaller scale.

@KTizzle - I'm with you when it came down to it we the money we saved from scaling down our wedding is going towards our house fund

I scale it down, fh jacks it back up....its been back and forth like that for months now lol

I always knew no more than 150 people. Buy there are things I simply do not care about like a limo, and chair covers. I ALMOST gave in over the weekend glad I didn't. this post reminded me that it's about marrying my other half, not what someone's ads sits on.

@Nay - Glad you didn't give in. I'm glad I could remind, I think that's what prompted my decision because I was done being pulled all sorts of ways. What sealed the deal for me was when FW said in not as nice terms stop worrying about pleasing everyone or what everyone else wants; do what you want, what makes you happy. Whatever makes you happy do it!

If we had the budget for both, we'd have been moving forward with the original plans. We did lose a little money (just the DJ deposit, oddly enough). Oh plus we get a honeymoon now! We were barely able to do our budget before and that was without a honeymoon. F that noise.

The desire to scale down our wedding came too late. STDs were out and deposits down. Glad you caught it in time.

I have change my date several times because of my kidney issues. We were going to elope and our families had a fit. We tried small and intimate because it will totally wear me out to have a wedding and reception all in one day. Finally I said enough. I set my date and told the doctors to deal with it. There will be no procedures, test, or surgeries the week of and after my wedding date. I am doing a very short wedding ceremony and a 4 hour reception. It will totally wear me out and FH will have to put me to bed right after the reception but everyone is happy this way. I get my pretty pictures, and FH has his family witness the marriage. We agreed on 150 people and we may hit 180 but that is okay. We cut all bridal party except our kids and grandchildren. I am excited and nervous all at the same time. Congrats on doing what you want.

We scaled down our wedding big time. (We had been planning for more than a year before the move) We went from 180 guests and our venues big, beautiful banquet room to 75-85 guests and our venues smaller room. (Same ceremony site) But that move cut our costs by more than half. We feel like a weight has been lifted and now we are enjoying wedding planning again. Best decision so far!

Many of my clients have. Some of them start small, realize that everything has spiraled out of control and called a halt to it. Some started huge and just threw up their hands and said, "no more'. For many, the WEDDING takes on a life of it's own and by the end, they have no relationship to the thing. It's simply a giant, expensive party that bears no resemblance to what they wanted for the day.

Celia, that's in a sense what had happened with me and FH. I wanted a small/intimate wedding, but he wanted a "big to-do" wedding (all our friends and family, reception, dj, etc). So I started planning a big wedding, but because of the time crunch at the time (he wanted to get married this Sept), nothing was panning out the way we envisioned it. We were not on the same page about things and the tension was starting to really affect both of us. This past weekend we agreed to push it back to have time to do it right and do it the way WE wanted, not the way the time-crunch would dictate. I am still hoping that after discussing it more that we do end up having a smaller wedding though. We'll see, but I am definitely glad we put the breaks on the first plan.