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Just Said Yes October 2020

Am i crazy?

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Kelsey, on July 10, 2020 at 4:13 PM

One of my bridesmaids passed away in October 2019 and we are getting married this October. Her husband is the best man who began dating a woman not even two months after her passing. This woman is also an old friend of my bridesmaid’s who consistently took advantage of and mistreated her (I of course have ill feelings towards her prior to my friend passing away). The best man assumed that she was invited, which she was not invited even before my friend’s passing. I immediately, but politely yet sternly, told him no she is not invited and I do not want her there. My fiancé was also good friends with the bridesmaid and he doesn’t want her there either. We’ve talked about it and are on the same page. Is it wrong of me to not want her there? What do I do?

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22 Comments

Expert September 2020
· on July 13, 2020 at 2:49 AM
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You have total control of who attends your wedding that you are paying for so you can definitely put your foot down here and say she’s not invited. That’s a really tough situation for sure. And if he decides not to attend, so be it. Less drama for you
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Dedicated November 2021
Cheryl · on July 13, 2020 at 12:02 PM
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You're not crazy. And I disagree with those that say "this is a tough one". It's not tough at all. If you and your FH are in agreement that you don't want her there, then she's out. PERIOD. It is YOUR wedding and you are absolutely allowed to decide who you want there and who you don't want there. You may run the risk of upsetting the best man, but if he is a true friend, while he may initially be bothered by it, he will just have to suck it up and realize it's not about HIM, it's about the two of YOU. You two may have to decide to tell him why you don't want her there, if he asks, and you'll have to decide how much you want to tell him, but stick to your guns. You should not have to deal with anything that will detract from your day -- especially and unwelcome guest.
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