Am i asking for too much? (trigger warning)

This makes my heart hurt!

While I feel for you and hate that you don't feel comfortable in your own skin, I think that's something you have to take care of within yourself, not project that onto other people. Unfortunately, you'll never escape "pretty" girls - work, social life, family's S.O etc., there will always be someone "prettier". - NOT that that's true, but there will always be a reason to feel that way.

You need to speak to someone or figure out some ways to build your confidence to where you can be around any girl in the world and know your worth and feel beautiful inside and out!

I hate that you've had comments made like that to you or you fiancé - but that just shows THEIR weaknesses, not yours.

Figure out some ways to feel comfortable and confident in your own skin and you can take over the world babe! This is YOUR season of being a BRIDE! You should feel so beautiful and worthy and powerful. Get to that point and you won't care who's in the room - nothing will stop you!

As for the party, I think you're going to have to bite the bullet and invite the girlfriends. You never know, these may be girls you end up loving! It isn't fair to punish the girls, they haven't done anything!

These are two separate issues. If your FBILs have said something mean about you, it needs to be addressed right then and there and the FBIL put in his place and told that his behaviour is rude and will not be tolerated. From what you have said, your FH did speak to his brother(s) and from what I understand, nothing rude has been said about you in the last two years so I would assume the FBILs have come to understand that their behaviour was in poor taste.

As to your FBIL bringing his significant other, you are asking too much for their significant others not to be invited. If your FBILs are still behaving poorly, then it doesn’t really matter whether their spouses/partners are with them at your cake and punch. Coming alone will not prevent them from comparing you to others and if they still are behaving that way, the solution is not to tell them not to bring their significant others but to address it with them or make a decision as to whether you will interact with them at all. If they have been composed and respectful toward you since the incident a few years ago then it is not very fair to punish them for something from years’ past considering that significant others come as part of a packaged deal.

I've gotten negative body comments about me from others for being quote "too pale," "too dark," "too skinny," "too fat," "too ugly," "too pretty," "too short," "too tall" etc. You catch my drift. I struggled with EDs from ages 9-24, it didn't get better until I sought out help. I've recently lost a ton of weight and am in a healthier mindset due to continuing therapy and focusing on my mental health above else. I have beautiful sisters, I mean they're model worthy, the envy of many of their peers and look amazing for their age. I was constantly compared to them growing up and I felt like would never live up to their standards. My sisters weren't the problem, they weren't at fault for being attractive and being compared to an awkward pimply teen. The people saying ugly comments were wrong for doing so and so were my parents for not putting a stop to it sooner. Asking your guests to not bring their "more attractive" dates is in itself doing what was done to you. Maybe you didn't say anything negative to them or about them but holding them(the dates) accountable for comments they cannot control is wrong and mean. No one and I mean no one is responsible for who deems them attractive. We are all beautiful to some and ugly to others. Its how we view ourselves that matters.