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Jaci
Beginner September 2020

All adult reception and save the dates

Jaci, on March 13, 2019 at 8:42 PM Posted in Etiquette and Advice 0 23
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When you send out the save the dates do you put on there that’s it’s a adult only reception or does it just go on the actual invites? TIA!

23 Comments

Latest activity by Krystin, on March 14, 2019 at 4:00 PM
  • Caytlyn
    Legend November 2019
    Caytlyn ·
    • Flag
    It doesn’t need to go on either. Just address the invitation to who is invited, no need to mention who isn’t.
    • Reply
  • Victorian Bride
    Master April 2021
    Victorian Bride ·
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    View Quoted Comment
    I agree with, Caytlyn. You can also put it in on your FAQ page of your website.
    • Reply
  • Loren
    Devoted October 2020
    Loren ·
    • Flag
    I’m putting it on the website and on the details card.

    respectfully, an adult only event.

    This is extremely important to me and I want to make sure it’s well known.
    • Reply
  • Jessica
    VIP June 2020
    Jessica ·
    • Flag

    I am putting * adults only affair* on the bottom of our invites and addressing them to specific people instead of families. I am not including that on the save the dates.

    • Reply
  • Alexandra
    Super December 2018
    Alexandra ·
    • Flag

    Our parents mentioned it to any family member so they knew. You can also put the number of RSPV on the card before you mail it out so they know. I also addressed the invites only to the couple, not to Mr. & Mrs. So-and-so and Family, or just the So-and-so Family. Word of mouth works really well.

    • Reply
  • Sherry
    Master September 2019
    Sherry ·
    • Flag

    I would include a details card with your invitation as well as putting it on your website if you are having one.

    • Reply
  • Danielle
    Master June 2019
    Danielle ·
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    View Quoted Comment

    This is what you should do. Website, details card (or even the bottom of the invite itself). But I wouldn't put it on your STD. The STD is more or less just an announcement that you're getting married. I disagree with PP that you don't need to put it anywhere, and should just address the adults.....that leaves it open for guests to get confused and not understand. I have kids, if I received a wedding invitation addressed to me and FH only, but it didn't specifically say "no kids" then I'd assume we were allowed to bring them.

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  • Natalie
    Beginner May 2019
    Natalie ·
    • Flag
    For my invites, I just added it to my wedding website RSVP page and I explained why as nicely as I could.
    • Reply
  • Gen
    Champion June 2019
    Gen ·
    • Flag
    I wouldn’t put it on your save the dates directly but just make sure to address the save the date envelopes to “Mr and Mrs Smith” instead of “the smith family” which will make it clear that just the people mentioned by name are invited
    • Reply
  • Loren
    Devoted October 2020
    Loren ·
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    View Quoted Comment
    Oh yeah. Not putting it on our save the dates.
    • Reply
  • Monica
    Dedicated April 2021
    Monica ·
    • Flag
    Not the save the date, but mentioning it on the invite is fine. I am also putting exactly who it is addressed to. On the RSVP card we are wording it "please reserve___of 2 seats" or even "please reserve__of 1 seats" it'll help eliminate the plus ones and children.
    • Reply
  • JustKidding
    VIP April 2018
    JustKidding ·
    • Flag

    You address the invites to who is invited. You don't state who is not invited.

    • Reply
  • R
    Dedicated October 2017
    Rachael ·
    • Flag

    Even if you just address the invites to who you want to attend I would say expect people to ask or clarify. I invited children and worded the invite "the smith family" and included the child in the "please reserve __ of 3 seats" and still got questions if kids were invited.

    For this reason I would definitely mention on the invites that the wedding is adults only. A lot of people won't check the website, so having it somewhere on the invite hopefully will cut down on the number of questions you get from guests.

    • Reply
  • MrsD
    Legend July 2019
    MrsD ·
    • Flag

    Traditionally it doesn't go on either. I've seen it on one invite but that's it, we've been to probably 10 weddings and over half were adults only. They just addressed save the dates & invites to just the adults, and the RSVP card said "___ out of ____ attending" and the bride & groom filled out the second line.

    • Reply
  • Kat
    Expert May 2019
    Kat ·
    • Flag
    We didn’t put it on our STDs, but we did have a link to our website, which says “adults only reception”. For our invites, we included “adults only please” on the Details card (not on the actual invitation).

    I honestly don’t think addressing the envelope to the adults only is enough. If you feel strongly about not having kids at your wedding, make it clearly known. And the sooner the better, because it gives people more time to find child care if they need to.
    • Reply
  • Haaley
    Expert December 2019
    Haaley ·
    • Flag
    What I did was-
    1. Address save the dates to people on main envelope.
    2. Write specific names on inside envelope.

    That way, hopefully it is clear that the STD was sent to THEM and no additional people.

    When I send invitations, it will include details about being a formal adults only event (minus bridal party).
    Just make sure you only address it to the adults
    • Reply
  • Haaley
    Expert December 2019
    Haaley ·
    • Flag
    View Quoted Comment
    Right, you would never put "No Children Allowed."

    However, you could put "Adults only Reception."
    • Reply
  • ChefKait
    Devoted December 2019
    ChefKait ·
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    View Quoted Comment

    This is where you should put it if necessary. I made a FAQ page on my website and I made the very first question: "Are my kids invited?" and I said something along the lines of "While we love your kids we want you to have a night off" or something

    • Reply
  • Loren
    Devoted October 2020
    Loren ·
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    Not going to run the risk that someone won’t look. If it’s on the details card I see no problem with that as long as it’s worded eloquently.
    • Reply
  • bethf
    Devoted August 2019
    bethf ·
    • Flag

    I am doing the same thing, I just addressed my STD's to the invited quests and ill do the same on the invites, but maybe state a fancier way to say "adult only'' on them and the wedding website.

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