Our parents mentioned it to any family member so they knew. You can also put the number of RSPV on the card before you mail it out so they know. I also addressed the invites only to the couple, not to Mr. & Mrs. So-and-so and Family, or just the So-and-so Family. Word of mouth works really well.
This is what you should do. Website, details card (or even the bottom of the invite itself). But I wouldn't put it on your STD. The STD is more or less just an announcement that you're getting married. I disagree with PP that you don't need to put it anywhere, and should just address the adults.....that leaves it open for guests to get confused and not understand. I have kids, if I received a wedding invitation addressed to me and FH only, but it didn't specifically say "no kids" then I'd assume we were allowed to bring them.
I wouldn’t put it on your save the dates directly but just make sure to address the save the date envelopes to “Mr and Mrs Smith” instead of “the smith family” which will make it clear that just the people mentioned by name are invited
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Oh yeah. Not putting it on our save the dates.
Not the save the date, but mentioning it on the invite is fine. I am also putting exactly who it is addressed to. On the RSVP card we are wording it "please reserve___of 2 seats" or even "please reserve__of 1 seats" it'll help eliminate the plus ones and children.
Even if you just address the invites to who you want to attend I would say expect people to ask or clarify. I invited children and worded the invite "the smith family" and included the child in the "please reserve __ of 3 seats" and still got questions if kids were invited.
For this reason I would definitely mention on the invites that the wedding is adults only. A lot of people won't check the website, so having it somewhere on the invite hopefully will cut down on the number of questions you get from guests.
Traditionally it doesn't go on either. I've seen it on one invite but that's it, we've been to probably 10 weddings and over half were adults only. They just addressed save the dates & invites to just the adults, and the RSVP card said "___ out of ____ attending" and the bride & groom filled out the second line.
We didn’t put it on our STDs, but we did have a link to our website, which says “adults only reception”. For our invites, we included “adults only please” on the Details card (not on the actual invitation).
I honestly don’t think addressing the envelope to the adults only is enough. If you feel strongly about not having kids at your wedding, make it clearly known. And the sooner the better, because it gives people more time to find child care if they need to.
This is where you should put it if necessary. I made a FAQ page on my website and I made the very first question: "Are my kids invited?" and I said something along the lines of "While we love your kids we want you to have a night off" or something