Advice or tips for a blended family wedding

Congratulations on your engagement!! You could have them as flower girls/ring bearers/junior bridesmaids/junior groomsmen, and/or you could do a family commitment/unity ceremony during your wedding ceremony. You could have vows/promises that you read to each child during the ceremony.


If you want to include them in wedding planning as well, you could have them help you choose details such as flowers or colors, or help you assemble centerpieces (or maybe they could each draw something or create something that you could incorporate into the centerpieces).

Congratulations! You can use them as ring bearers and flower girls. For the 12 year old he/she could be a jr bridesmaid/groomsmen

Talk to the older ones. Some kids really want to be part of the procession, and do a vow. Others are really taken aback at the ceremony, a time of insecurity. They really want to sit with family or friends, end of front row seats, and take it all in. After your vows, they might be happy to stand and promise to be a loving family. Being " overly encouraged" or pushed by others even with the intention of others cheering them on, can just make some stubbornly refuse: the only way to show their control in an uncertain feeling time. The littler ones will sense how the older ones feel. So give the kids a choice, and if they go back and forth, right up to the wedding, tell them it is their choice . If they do not participate much in the ceremony, one other good time is at cake time. The original meaning of the cutting of cake, and each feeding the other, is that Bride and Groom will nurture and take care of each other from now on. In my culture we also do it at adoptions. And I have seen blended families do it where the kids love that mommy and daddy feed each other a piece, then each will feed some to each of the children. Then it is each child's turn. Food, kids understand, love and laughter at the family table. I have seen some do it where a couple older children carry full pieces, not tiny bits for feeding each other, and deliver them to the grand parents. Toasts with liquor are meaningless to kids. But with cake on board, or other goodies, taking a vow to each love and take care of all the members of the family, comes easily. Good luck to you! 🙂Another mother of 5.

Congrats we are blending a family too I have 7 kids and together we have 1 and expecting another, we are having our oldest 13,12 be bridesmaids and groomsmen junior bridesmaids and jr groomsmen for our 8,7 year old the flower girl and ring bears for the other ones

We are including our kids in the wedding party (ring bearer, flower girl, bridesmaid, and groomsmen.... honestly our family is half of the processional lol!) Later we will each day vows to each other’s kids before saying the traditional ones to each other. We will also be doing a sand ceremony so each one of us can pour a different color sand into a family photo frame. Creating a “blended” family.

Congratulation's!! I am bringing children into our marriage as well and when it came to their level of involvement with the wedding day I asked them what they were most comfortable doing. My daughter who is almost 12 and very extroverted wanted to be heavily involved so she is a junior bridesmaid. My son who is almost 14 and on the autism spectrum is significantly shyer and wanted to be slightly involved but not center of attention. My son will be escorting my Mom into our wedding ceremony and sitting with her and my dad during the ceremony and he is thrilled with this level of involvement. We are going to have a sand ceremony to represent the 4 of us coming together during our wedding ceremony also. I think it is important to talk to the kids and see what they are most comfortable doing, offer roles you think they would enjoy and see what they would like to do.

Congrats! You got engaged on my birthday, I recently got engaged 10/26/2020. We have 2 children, I have a son from a previous marriage and we have a daughter together. I want to include them in the ceremony since, for my son especially, this is a huge moment. My son wants my FH to adopt him so doing a family unity ceremony is important to me. I saw in a magazine about these custome made family puzzles. I plan on looking into one and possibly using that.