Advice from the married ladies?

Guests commented on our vows, the DJ, the food, and the signature drinks we chose. Honestly, that's what guests care about. They also complimented the flowers. Guests like having a good time. Honestly, I'm a month away from our 1 year anniversary and I barely remember anything from the day except spending time with my family and friends. I barely remember the decor or anything like that unless I look at pictures. Don't stress about the details. Everything will be great.

Guests really liked our DJ and photo booth. My mom loved our salad. Even almost a year later, she is still talking about the salad.

The guests commented the most about our food. they raved about it. which i am happy about because that was what i spent the most on, afterall.

what pp said about decor and the small details is spot on - i had all these other things people didn't notice and i spent so much time and effort on them thinking they would.

also, things are gonna go unexpectedly sometimes but that at the end of the day, it's ok that it didn't go "perfectly" cause it doesn't ruin your happiness of that day the way you'd think. for instance my candy table was supposed to be on one wall instead of the other - so what, ya know?

Bump and follow!

We got married Feb 2020.


Day of coordinator was super helpful. I just worried about getting hair, makeup, and getting dressed and making sure my hubby had his toothbrush and stuff to get ready....haha. She did the rest, so we could enjoy the day/night.

Just like everyone else said. People want to have a good time, good food, and good drinks. Everyone had a great time and many people commented on the food. Some people said they liked our vows.
I personally was choosey with our photographer. I love her so much, she captured the moment, and was on the dance floor with us. I still talk to her too this day.

I just made sure to be organized way in advance. I had list and my mom was my right hand woman. She helped us to get last minute details.

Just enjoy the night. It doesn't have to be perfect to really be perfect!!

The wedding day went amazing. Vendors and logistics were all great. My problem was getting so emotional when everyone started showing their true colors during the planning process. I assumed people close to us would be loving and supportive. Many were, but many of them started to be negative and ugly about stuff that they didn’t 100% agree with or thought was about them but had nothing to do with them. I wish I could have just ignored them and not cared. But obviously it hurts when people you thought were there for you turn on you.

I would say that the things that stood out to our friends and family were our food, DJ, open bar and our vows. Nothing else really mattered. Don’t stress about all the little things. Prioritize what’s important to you and then focus on those things. The things we really wanted to stand out were those that our friends noticed so to me that was success. Flowers, centerpieces, chairs, lines, etc were all nice but didn’t really matter to me.

This is a 2nd wedding for FH and I (I was a widow before he and I met), and everyone was excited about the food and the music. For them, it's celebrating the day but really a big party!


This time around, food and music are the focus, we're keeping everything else simple and relatively inexpensive. We're providing a really nice meal with options for everyone and I've asked the guests to put a song suggestion on their RSVP card 😉

For daughter & SIL's wedding, guests commented on the venue (it was stunning with awesome service), the food/bar (excellent and free-flowing), and the DJ/dancing (dance floor packed all night with guests ranging from 8-70+ yrs old). From the very beginning, the B&G prioritized having a fun celebration with their family and friends, so everything was pretty much centered on that. Also, daughter was very careful about choosing vendors she felt really comfortable with and she was CRAZY organized with every detail. She worked hard over their 18 month engagement, but the week of she handed everything off to the vendors and just full-on enjoyed EVERY minute.... The time went way too fast, but they had no regrets when it was done -- their wedding was perfect!

It was really important to her to stick to her budget, so she comparison shopped like crazy to find what she wanted for a price that worked. Along the way, probably one thing she learned was that DIY doesn't always pay off. She spent a lot of time and energy trying to come up with DIY centerpieces, but then found an awesome florist who would do beautiful fresh floral arrangements for $30 a piece.... Early on, she bought some kits to make invitations, but then found that with coupons, Zazzle's products were both really beautiful and VERY reasonable. Take your time and think about different ideas and options, but don't rush to buy stuff until you really have a clear vision -- in the end, you'll save money. Good luck!

1) Most guests care only about good food and drinks (and being comfortable--not too hot, cold or wet). The decor is for you...skip the details unless you want them because nobody notices.

2) Thank goodness our photographer included a 2nd shooter! So many amazing photos during key moments (at different angles or of people). Pay to have a 2nd shooter, even if only for 90 minutes. Hopefully, not that much to add.

3) DIY does not = cheap. And it's a crap load of work.

4) The last 30 days and the last week can be very stressful. Even though we were over-budget I WISH I booked myself a massage the week of. Would have helped 100%.

5) If your venue does not have a DOC, hire one. It would be chaos without one. Don't make friends or a family member do it.

1. Have the wedding you and your FH want. If this means declining money from parents, because it comes with strings attached, do that. Don’t be pressured into a wedding that you don’t want.

2. Create an email address specifically for wedding planning! That way if you order things online, sign up for mailing lists all the spam is in one place, plus it means you have all your wedding info together and don’t have to go digging through your regular email to find something.

3. Make sure you have plenty of delicious food. It doesn’t have to be high end - if Italian from a local restaurant fits your budget better, no issues with that, just so long as there is enough for everyone. If you can’t afford a full meal, cake a punch at an afternoon reception is lovely.

4 (and this ties in with #1). Have the wedding you can afford. Don’t take out a loan for a party, don’t go into debt for one day. If you have champagne taste on a beer budget, cut your guest list or postpone so you can save up more.

5. Guest comfort is important. Don’t prioritise dress, decor etc over those - if I go to a wedding where the bride is wearing a multi-thousand dollar dress and has extravagant flowers but I get two apps during cocktail hour and some dry chicken and limp salad for dinner, I’ll be pissed off. If I go to a cake and punch wedding where the bride has done a stack of DIY and has a beautiful but simple, inexpensive dress, I’m happy as a clam. The reception is to thank the guests for coming to the ceremony so they need to be made welcome appropriately.

Make it about YOU TWO. We kept it fairly simple, but the wedding was deeply *us*. We themed it to our passions, wrote our own vows, and had a reception sword fight with friends. Add in good food and a good DJ, and the day practically took care of itself. Friends were coming up at the end of the day telling us it was one of the best weddings they'd ever been to.

Make sure you communicate well with your vendors, do NOT take any one else's opinions, and do what makes you happy. If the wedding day reflects the love of the couple, it always works out fine.

This is my second wedding. We’re keeping it pretty intimate. My first wedding was big and felt like a whirlwind. It went so fast and I talked with so many people. It felt like I didn’t get to really spend quality time with anyone in particular and that’s what I would like most of all with an intimate wedding. Less people and spending quality time with my immediate family and close friends. Also having less events. We’re foregoing most traditions at the reception and just having a served dinner.

If you want those things, great! but just know you go from A to B to C and it’s over just like that!

I just want everyone to relax, have some good food and drinks, and good conversation!

Get all your vendors lined up as soon as you can. Once that's done, it's basically smooth sailing.

The most stressful part is RSVPs and getting people to respond on time, then dealing with the rejections. Make sure you leave enough time for dress fittings and running small errands a day or two before the wedding (picking up dress, getting nails done, etc.)

Get a DOC for your wedding day. Someone who can answer guest's questions, coordinate ceremony and reception (especially if they are at two different locations).

Don't get too caught up on your day-of timeline to the point it takes away from enjoying your day. At that point, you've planned and planned and it's time to sit back and let things go. On my WD the florist delivered my bouquet and some boutonnières to the church instead of the hotel which caused photography to fall behind schedule which meant I didn't get many bridal portraits. That's the way it goes sometimes, and it's okay.

Things I didn't notice, the chairs and floral arrangements. I didn't spend $1000 to upgrade to chivari chairs and used whatever banquet chairs the hotel had. I got the florist to cut their original quote in half which meant smaller centerpieces. I thought they would look too small on the tables, but I didn't pay attention to them and can't remember that much about the decor to this day.

Guests most appreciate good food, alcohol, and having fun. That's all they care about. I hate to say this, but after being to numerous weddings, the only thing I think about in the moment is the food and drinks, and I don't remember much of anything else afterwards. They blur together and fade away (which is kind of sad in a way).

Love this thread. It helps me not worry so much about centerpieces lol

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THIS. This process brought out the worst (but also the best) in the people we know and love. I couldn't emphasize this any more. The personality dynamics were far more stressful than the actual planning.

Our guests commented mostly on the venue, food, and music. We got married at an aviation museum, and people are still saying "that was the coolest wedding we've ever been to!", haha. Prior to the day of, I was SUPER focused on all the small details, such as the decor, centerpieces, etc. TBH, I wish i didn't focus so hard on those pieces, because most people didn't care/didn't notice them. The day of, I was surprisingly calm and nothing bothered me, so some things were forgotten (rose pedals scattered down the aisle, some signs that I made) and it was still the best day ever! One more thing, I would HIGHLY recommend the night before, having the night to yourself. I was able to take a long bath, mentally prepare, and just breathe lol.