Adult only wedding

@Juli we indicated it on our RSVP cards "Adult ceremony & reception" as well as specifically stating the # of seats reserved (note: I know that may seem like overkill but I'd rather spell it out as much as possible to avoid confusion)

@shannon lol true.

We are only allowing kids in the bridal party at the wedding. No other kids.

"Just remind them that it's ok to enjoy a night away from the kids."

@Angie this is rude. You don't need to remind parents of anything. They're adults. Let them be adults and don't presume to know what's best for them or their family. Also, if you want an adult-only wedding, then own it. Don't lie to your guests and blame the venue when they can easily look it up and find out the truth.

@Shannon it's rude to put adults only on the invitation or enclosure card.

I honestly never bring my son to a wedding, unless he's asked to be in it. I really dont think it's so shocking when it's adults only. That's what babysitters are for.

We are having an adults only wedding except our 2 kids who are in the wedding and our 3 nieces but that is it. Our bridal party all have kids and are ok with our decision they actually are happy to have a night out with out their kids. Your bridesmaid should be able to get a sitter for one day. It's your special day and she agreed to be there for you. Good luck I hope she respects you and your FH wishes.

@Elizabeth is there a place to put it that wouldn't be considered rude? Or would you say just having the exact number of seats reserved on the RSVP card is enough?

(Note: invite design is prepared but not printed yet, could still be altered)

Having the exact number of seats on the RSVP and addressing the invitation exactly to who is invited is sufficient. If you want to do more, it's okay to spread it by word of mouth or put adults only on the website. But the invite itself should not include that.

I have seen several posts about this and after talking to several people in my family and own social circle I have heard both sides of it. We're also doing an adults only ceremony/reception, with the exception of the younger people in the bridal party. We did the math and if we invite everyone's kids between our families and friends, we would have about 40 children there. Of course we don't think that everyone would bring their children, however it's been pretty much the same across the board that if you are inviting more than just those in the bridal party, you should extend the courtesy and the invite everyone's kids. Word of mouth is probably your best bet, along with addressing your invitations accordingly to whom exactly you wish to invite. I would make sure that your parents (esp. if they are hosting or co-hosting the event) + BM & MOH know that it's going to be adults only so that they can reinforce the questions that may come with it being kid friendly or not. I know that there are so many people out there who couldn't imagine their day without all the children that are close to them and I love that, but everyone's circumstances may not allow them to host children. Whether it be restraints with the venue or wishing for a "worry-free atmosphere" as it's been put in some other forum postings (I see both sides of that wording, that idea isn't kosher with everyone I guess). Whatever you are comfortable doing, you do. If having an adults only wedding makes the most sense for your circumstances then your family and friends will understand and make accommodations. If the only reason some people can't make it is because they can't find or afford a babysitter and you really want them to be there, offer to hire a babysitter for the night.

Thanks everyone. Unfortunately it did not go over well. I called her and she ignored my call. She texted me instantly and said she can't be apart of my wedding anymore. She feels I'm excluding her family and demanding too much. (she also mentioned she was still breastfeeding and what I'm asking is basically impossible).. Wthen I called her originally, I wanted to talk and find a solution and before we could, she backed out without even talking to me (over the phone or in person.. It was all over a text message) I'm so heartbroken and upset. She won't even confirm if she will be able to attend the wedding at all, even as a guest. I feel like I did something wrong and there is no way to fix this

Thanks everyone. Unfortunately it did not go over well. I called her and she ignored my call. She texted me instantly and said she can't be apart of my wedding anymore. She feels I'm excluding her family and demanding too much. (she also mentioned she was still breastfeeding and what I'm asking is basically impossible).. Wthen I called her originally, I wanted to talk and find a solution and before we could, she backed out without even talking to me (over the phone or in person.. It was all over a text message) I'm so heartbroken and upset. She won't even confirm if she will be able to attend the wedding at all, even as a guest. I feel like I did something wrong and there is no way to fix this

It's perfectly acceptable to have an adult only wedding. Especially for children that young.

If money is the reason she's upset, maybe you could help get a babysitter- there are nonchalant ways of doing that without implying she can't afford it. I'm thinking of hiring a babysitter on site to watch the kids in another room-

I know that could be tricky if you only want to offer it for your one friend (I luckily only have about 4 guests total with kids) - you could keep it on the DL and not mention to people your paying.

Breastfeeding is kind of the exception. The rule is if you can't accommodate then be prepared for a decline. So, here we are!

ETA: Breastfeeding at 2 seems like a rarity but some women do it and more power to them!!

Don't feel bad. This is entitled behavior by your friend in my opinion. Others may disagree with me, and that's fine.

You are absolutely not required to invite ANYONE, of any age, just because they exist. And even if she is still breastfeeding by your wedding, what does she do every other time she has to do something where her child can't go? I would never believe that your wedding is the first time that she's ever not been allowed to bring her son somewhere. A breastfeeding newborn is a common exception to the no children rule because of the importance of establishing the breastfeeding relationship. At 2 years old this should not be an issue.

Your friend is still being rude. Sorry if I sound harsh, but I'm so sick of this attitude from some parents that their children should be included in everything. I would NEVER demand that my children be invited to a wedding. I'm in a wedding in December, my children are not invited, and not once did I ever have the audacity to demand that they be there and then throw some sort of childish fit. Don't give in to her behavior. I know it sucks but this is not your fault.

I'm only having my niece and nephew. We already have a large guest list to begin with.

How did you not know she was still breastfeeding? And if you did know and still told her no kids, then I'm sorry, but I see why she's upset. At this point, you have no choice but to just move on. You can make whatever rule you want for your wedding, but that doesn't mean others are required to come or be in the bridal party.

I had no idea she was still breastfeeding her son. That might sound weird, but that is never something we talked about. We have gone for dinner and her son eats regular food. I know I screwed up and should have came to that decision earlier. Like I mentioned, we came to this decision recently.

And you're opposed to making an exception for bridal party?

Some of my cousins are young (7+) so they are invited, but no family more extended than that or friends children are invited.

We plan on having an adult only wedding as well . .to those who have sent out their invites , what's the best way to word it . .so no one gets offended ? Thanks in advance