Adult only wedding?

I’m having tons of kids at mine and would still be totally cool with a no kids wedding. I don’t care if you will have rainbows, cotton candy, unicorns, Spongebob and Mickey Mouse there - if you guys don’t want kids at YOUR wedding, do NOT feel obligated to change your minds. You Aunt is ONE guest out of many. Does she take her kid to work, late night movies, etc.? Believe me, there will be plenty of guests breathing a sigh of relief that there won’t be kids there. Think about them if you’re tempted to waiver.

Have your FH talk to mom and Aunt. (His family, his conversation) Express that you’d both love for her to attend and if she’s unable to, you’d be disappointed but understand. HOWEVER also explain the decision is final, not up for debate and if it’s brought up again the subject WILL be changed every time. People honestly don’t realize how rude THEY are being when they try to dictate who you should be comfortable inviting to YOUR wedding!

Be strong. You’ve got this girl. Good luck!

View Quoted Comment So can adults though. I find plus ones to be an extra cost personally.

Dont fell bad...its your wedding

Do not feel bad!!!! I’ve seen kids treat a wedding reception like a playground!!! 🤣they are kids and that’s what they do! We have three very young children that will be attending the wedding of course and three that are in the wedding, l am advising the parents now that they will need to keep a close eye on their children at all times.

Not at all. Do not let them wear you down. Aunt can get a babysitter or not come.

I had to go through this, too! Just stand firm and tell them that's just how it is. If they're really upset and don't go because of it, then that's on them. The people that originally had something to say about it at my wedding have all RSVP'd that they're still coming, just without their kids. I also put on my wedding website:

"Although we adore your children, due to space constraints we ask that only adults attend.”

No you should not feel bad. We are having an adults only wedding too... the reasons being (1) my little cousins are extremely rowdy (there's 4 of them under the age of 7) and I would be stressed the entire day about them running around and breaking stuff because they honestly would. (2) we just don't have the money to pay for more guests, especially when those guests are children who... (3) definitely will not enjoy a day in an elegant ballroom.

You should not feel bad about this. Many people do not want children at their weddings and, most 6 year olds would not want to be at a wedding anyway!

Nope! An adult-only wedding is fine and your rule of “18 & over” makes sense. Stand your ground. It would definitely be rude to invite some children & not others. The aunt can get a babysitter.

Nope, not at all. Stand your ground. Or be prepared for your FMIL to expect to get her way EVERY. TIME. SHE. WANTS. TO. DISAGREE.

You are correct that no one makes the decision but the hosts, B and G, and it is exceedingly rude for others to question their decisions except in rare circumstances, which can be approved exceptions without anyone else saying, then my kid, parent, whoever, must come too. Aunt and Mom are out of bounds. As to anyone else who says why not young kits, it is correct to say they are rarely invited to evening formal functions of any kind. Or you are not rude if you say, there are no young children invited to this evening wedding because we are the hosts of this party, and we decided not to have them. . No further explanation is needed. If they persist, say, well if you feel children belong at evening weddings, the next time you get married, invite them. We already decided on a guest list of adults. Sometimes mothers, aunts, grandmothers need to learn, their position has shifted. You may always be their child, but in your life, and in social matters, you are adults who make all if your own decisions, and to maintain family harmony, they need to stop treating you like kids and undermining your choices. That is not acceptable. Boundaries now, save lifelong fights later. We will have children or not, when we decide. Please don't ask again. We cannot visit you for dinner regularly anymore, we have shifts to work an evening and weekend schedule, for more money. We are sorry you don't like it, but that is how it is. So much easier to start at the wedding. They will accept your answers with less fuss over time.

Don't feel bad and DON"T GIVE IN.

I had the exact same situation where my aunt was upset her young boys couldn't come and even asked my mom to talk to me to convince me to invite them.

I never understood why parents are so die hard for their children to come to weddings. People have adult parties all the time - why should your wedding be different?

We did have one couple decline because they couldn't bring their kids. Oh well. We will see them at the next family gathering.

On the flip side I literally had a couple people comment after the wedding that they had so much fun and were glad no kids were running around.

So basically you'll never make everyone happy when planning a wedding so stand your ground and do what makes you and FH happy.

I wouldn't feel bad, it's your wedding and you want an adult's only event. 6 years old is old enough to stay with a family member or sitter (unlike a newborn, which I usually understand having to bring).

No, you shouldn’t feel bad. I personally feel like the guest list isn’t something people should feel bad about in general. Couples are operating within their budget, venue capacity and aren’t trying to offend people (usually). If I got an invite I take that as “of all the people they could have invited, they want me there” and that counts for something, in my opinion.