A/B/C List

@Kate, maybe? I had never heard of a C list prior to these articles...

@Laura, hella rude!

They suck.

We had A/B/C list in terms of making our guest lists, but not for actual invites.

I have been D listed at a wedding once. I was asked the week of to come because people had dropped last minute. I said I was busy just as @Laura did. I thought it was improper. I was a clear afterthought.

I think having different lists is weird. Either invite them or not. Don't put people on a list.

This makes me think of the FH who (with good intentions) told a coworker she was on the B list (the bride jokingly told him that when he asked where their invite was). That story/post was hysterical. I still chuckle when I think about it.

A B list, and even worse a *C* list is horrendously disrespectful. If I ever found out I was on one of those lists I sure as hell wouldn't go.

My B list are my moms friends that she wants to come. I have a max # of guests, so they can come if I get declines. No need in having empty seats that are paid for.

I'm in the minority lol so flame away. We are on a strict budget, not because we can't afford more, but because we know how easy it would be to run up a large bill inviting every single person we know...and we refuse to spend more than a certain amount on one day. With that being said our guest count is crucial! FH and I both reside in a place where neither one of us is from so almost 90% of our family is OOT. FH has a huge family and feels like he has to invite each and every one of them (regardless if they're close or not), so by the time he reached his max he realized that several of his friends in town would not make the list. At the end of the day he's fine with that because he would absolutely choose family over friends. The only way some of those friends will be able to come is if someone in his family declines.

Do I think FH needs to reevaluate how he decides on his guest list? Lol absolutely! I don't believe just because you're family that guarantees you an invite. I think you should invite who you truly want there. But I'm not gonna think it's rude if/when someone on his side declines that he extends an invite to an in town friend...provided there's ample notice given. Giving someone an invite 2 weeks before your wedding is rude!

Since our guests are mainly OOT FH wants to give people plenty of notice, so we'll probably send invites out a little earlier than normal and just ask for RSVPs a little earlier as well.

After having started planning a wedding, I'm actually way okay with b-listing. I wouldn't publicize it but I'm not against it. It is so hard to accommodate everyone. There is a way to show proper etiquette about it. Shoot, I'm so privileged to be invited to a wedding that B listed or not, I'd be there. I know what it feels like maybe not be able to have all the best of your friends there because you've got so much family to invite first.

I was B listed and honestly didn't care. I know weddings are expensive and if I wasn't invited as an A list guest, I can understand it. I did end up going to that wedding and had a wonderful time (they were great hosts!). I think it's better to not have these A B C lists, but I can see why it's done.

I never even knew C listing was a thing. B listing is bad enough but that is disgusting. Friends of mine and FH just got an invite to a wedding that they know was clearly a b list. Long story short he's a medical resident and someone in his program gave him his invite in person well over a month after they went out, and she knew the schedule had already been made for the month they get married so it would be unlikely that they could attend. Not only a B list but clearly only invited to "score points" for "trying". I was floored at that story. Gross.

I had an A, B, and C list for the planning phase. Now that save the dates have gone out, I have my one guest list. Is that not what these articles are talking about?

I was a b-list bridesmaid hahaha looking back; I should've declined but I was young and didn't know any better.

I think I kinda have a B list...I only sent STDs to our OT guests. I've already had several let me know that they had plans and wouldn't be attending, even though I am still several weeks away from sending actual invites. Those early NOs have freed up some space for a few more local friends to be invited. Once I send out invitations though, that's it.

I was B listed before and it did not bother me. The bride told me that get family is inviting all family first and then if there are declines she could invite friends. I was not offended and actually honored that I got an invite. I attended and had a great time!

I had a B list until we could figure out how many guests we could afford.. once we figured ut out and had our A list counted we looked the B list and then moved them to A list.. then the B list was thrown in the trash. So just like Erin it was an internal one... now that STD'S went out no one is moved around (unless they did not get an STD).. however... once invites go out nope.. no one is getting added unless we forgot a SO or our one single guest gets a girlfriend.

I have never been B listed.. and usually cannot attend things short notice.. so that would be a no from me.

I can think of only one time we were I guess technically "b-listed" but these were extenuating circumstances and we didn't take it to heart.

I was a teenager and I and my parents were invited to a wedding literally 2-3 days prior. My mom's coworker's brother was getting married (obviously we didn't know each other) and so in the course of their planning, this coworker would share her brother's plans with my mom (who like me, loves weddings). Tragically days before the wedding, an entire family (6? 8? Folks) had to decline due to an untimely death. This was after the headcount was given so there was literally going to be an empty table. The groom asked who he could possibly invite to just have a good time at that point and his sister said she had a couple coworker's who could go. So we went and had a blast.

I was verbally told to save someone's date, saved it, and then never got an invitation. So I guess that's kind of similar. It was super rude since I didn't make plans for that day and could have (though I did once it became evident that wasn't going to happen...).