a little annoyed (bachelorette party plans)

I would talk to your bridesmaid in private. Tell her you felt uncomfortable in the situation, and you'd actually prefer it just be close friends. Then she can talk to her friend and explain that to her.

I had a similar situation. My BM who was planning my bach invited 2 people who were not in the bridal party to come. One girl I was friends with and was coming to the wedding, and another girl I did not invite to the wedding so that made me uncomfortable. I did tell my BM that I felt weird about inviting someone to the bach who isn't even invited to the wedding and she brushed it off. Anyhow, neither of those two girls ended up coming anyhow and so it all worked out. But, I'd definitely voice your opinions.

"I'm sorry, I don't feel comfortable having someone that's not invited to the wedding at my bachelorette party."

I vote that if you really hate the girl but don’t want to bring it up maybe the bridesmaid talking to other bridesmaid on your behalf is the best plan for you but realistically you will probably still suffer the fallout

i think in these situations it’s best to be “rude” when you’re put on the spot and say it’s your close friends only but as that ship has sailed and you seem like you want to deal with an issue from a non-confrontational position than you might have to impose on another friend to put themselves in the middle of a situation that you are in



i really hope she isn’t at your party and you can uninvite her without any problems or confrontations

View Quoted Comment She had made a comment when she made the decision to ask in front of the girl that, "you're both going to be in my wedding eventually so you might as well be friends" something like that. I really dont care for this girl though

View Quoted Comment Here is where the confrontation remains. Friend uninvites her friend, her friend is now bitter towards me during mutual gatherings. Causes unnecessary drama. Its awkward. I'd never invite one of mine to a friends bachelorette party and if I wanted to I'd ask in private

View Quoted Comment My fiance said that but my friend will be dismissive and be like, oh she didnt care, she just wants to hang and have fun with us

View Quoted Comment Not going to fly. Shell be pushier or make me feel weird about it

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Then just say no. There's nothing wrong with telling your friends no.

If others, wedding party or someone else, are planning your bachelorette. ( that is, you are not planning and paying for everything for every person attending) then they are the hosts, and it is extremely rude for the bride to say who they can or can not invite. Brides should keep their mouths shut, when others are planning a party in the bride's honor. So you, vetoing any invitation, would be considered rude. Party hosts set the guest list, always. It is as out of place for you to overrule them, as it would be for your wedding guests to overrule you and tell you the bride who you can and cannot invite to your wedding and reception, where you and groom are hosts. As long as you are guest of honor, act like one. . . Brides can throw their own bachelorettes, where they are hostesses, plan and make decisions. Provided bride is paying for food and drinks for all guests, and travel and lodgings if away overnight. Which are you, guest of honor, or a hostess paying for everyone attending?

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Ugh lol its like already a thing now bc she caught me in a moment. if she had asked me in private I would have been honest. Having that girl there in the conversation and beam with excitement when my friend asked forced me to agree. I do not understand why people cant respect others- like thats fine for your own, but why invite your friends to mine?

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My MOH doesn't know my friends well- she is doing the main planning. I told her I do not mind helping, as all my friends are from all over (work, high school, college, family). I told her the place I would prefer my bachelorette to be (as I would like to have fun) but left everything else up to her and said it's no problem if at any time she needs help. I sent her all of the girls I wanted to invite and their numbers- that was it. My friend is a bridesmaid, not my MOH. I think it's rude to invite her friend (someone that I am not personally friends with) to MY bachelorette party. This girl is NOT invited to my wedding either. The way you make it seem is that I should be totally comfortable with celebrating my last day as a bachelorette before my wedding with people that I am not friends with. I have never heard of a bachelor or bachelorette party that included the friends of friends that have no connection to the bride or groom. Your comment came off as pretty rude- probably a nicer way to state your opinion. Lol why should someone I am not friends with be at my bachelorette party?

View Quoted Comment It seems you’ve received a lot of solid advice in these comments, but you have an excuse not to follow any of it. Sounds like the only option for you is to have the girl come to your bachelorette.

View Quoted Comment Like I said

i dont believe you can have your way AND avoid fall out

its probably let her attend or deal with the resulting drama of uninviting her

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Exactly- which is why im dealing with it but just wanted some advice

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I asked for advice- I am trying to see what the best route to take is, which is why I asked. How can I follow advice when I only posted yesterday? lol I am getting some opinions to see how to go about dealing with this. So, no excuses, I really just don't know what to do. It's conflicting.

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I agree. Talk to her privately, and tell her how you feel about the whole situation. If she blows it out of proportion, then either let her blow off steam and tell her to get over it, or blow up yourself... lol it is rude for her to have put you in that position to begin with. She wasn't thinking of you, she was selfish and only thinking of herself... She's a bridesmaid for a reason: she's special and important to you. And if she doesn't reciprocate the feelings then she's not a great friend at this moment...

View Quoted Comment I’m really sorry you’re having to deal with this situation!!

its completely awful in my opinion

if I were you I would just tolerate the girl I don’t like at the party to avoid further drama before the wedding and in the future in your social circle but you have to do what feels right for you

Thank you. that's helpful. I may just do that. Maybe by that point she will forget

View Quoted Comment So you do agree that it is a bit out of the ordinary for a bridesmaid to invite someone who is not close to the bride to the bachelorette? I just never heard of this before... kind of puts a damper on things