Hi Fellow Brides! We were originally supposed to get married 3/28/20, postponed to 10/24/20 and postponed AGAIN to 3/19/21. Our vendor won’t let us postpone without losing 50% of our deposit, which would be ~$12k. My fiancé and I have come to terms with the fact that not everyone will show, we’ve cut our guest list from 170 to 75 and at this point just want to be married! Our families have started telling us we should postpone again but no one seems concerned with the financial loss or the stress of it. I’m not sure what to do. I know you can’t put a price on people’s health but I also feel like we have to live our lives too. The ceremony and reception are all outdoors and we plan to observe social distancing, masks etc. anyone else in a similar situation? How are you handling family pushback??
Fellow AZ bride here - we’re getting married on 4/3/21 in Mesa at Regency Gardens. We’re getting married on that day regardless- 1) we really love our date & 2) we have been through so much both as a couple & individually. My fiancé is a firefighter/medic & I work at a hospital- we both started the vaccine last week. We are doing everything we can to ensure the health & safety of our guests. Our venue has cut their max capacity from 250 to 160 to be in compliance- our guest list is around 90 which is around 60% of the max capacity. Tables are 10 (instead of 12) per table & are 6 feet apart. Plenty of masks & hand sanitizers will be available. We know some will still not come & we respect their decision but this day is about us. Planning a wedding during a pandemic isn’t for the weak! You do you girl!
I would play hardball with them and tell them the cost to postpone is X ($12k plus new invites, cancellation fees and/or price changes on honeymoon or travel, anything else) and tell them that's more than *you* are willing to pay, which implies they're free to foot the bill if they want. People love to have opinions about how you should spend your money 🙄
Other than that, I would say to tell anyone who asks that you've weighed your options and decided this is the best course of action. I've heard in situations where people are obstinate, don't JADE (justify, argue, defend, explain).
If you want to marry, then do it and don't wait for other people's approval or support. If they refuse to support you, they are free to stay home, and no one needs that toxicity. You can't put other life events/decisions on hold either because someone else doesn't like what you have chosen.