2 waves of invites??

It won't be as simple as it sounds. In order for it to work, you will need to get a response from the out of towners at least two months before the wedding, so that you can send out the second "wave" early enough so it isn't obvious that they are part of a second "wave". You can't give the out of town people an RSVP deadline two months before the wedding, though-- the norm is two WEEKS, and people who ask for a month in advance are kind of stretching it. . . it is unlikely people will RSVP right away on their own, though.

It looks like you still have a year until your wedding-- I would really strongly encourage you to plan a wedding that will allow you to have the peopel you want there. I.e., if you want more people there, then you will need to structure your budget in such a way that will allow you to afford to have them there, regardless of whether other guests decline the invitation. . .

Also keep in mind that people talk to each other, and if one person gets an invitation and another doesnt, and they happen to talk about it, the jig is up, and everyone will be offended by what you did. . .whether its a true "A" and "B" list or not, it will look like one. . .

No, B-listing is rude. Invite them or don't, all at the same time. Plan for everyone you invite to attend.

If you do Save the dates you may find that some people tell you they cannot make it, but they still get invitations anyway, in case their situation changes and they can make it.

I agree with Barbara in that you can send the invite, but you can't control when they'll RSVP. It might work, but might not.

Thanks for the help ladies! Its been a toss up, someone brought the idea up to me, and I wasn't sure about it. Though it would be good to know in advance, I know it'll most likely be out of our control. Its not about a budget, but the capacity of the venue. The last thing I want to do is offend anyone, But the FMIL and my mother can get on those out-of-town guests as they are more in contact with them anyway.

We are doing this in a sense. My fiance is from the UK so we sent out invites across the pond at the end of August for our May wedding. His my was adamant that STDs weren't formal enough to get a response from those over there seeing as coming to our wedding would cost the a good 700-800 pounds/ over $1000. She wanted to send out the first batch to about 40 people, and as responses come in send out more depending of the number of declines. We requested a RSVP by the end of November so the people his mum sends the second wave out to will still have time to save. Honestly I didn't want to do it i would have rather have done STDs and gauged responses but yeah whatever to make FMIL happy. Besides she's the one who will be catching heat not me. So far we have 4 RSVPs.

We got a lot of yes and no's from our std's maybe have a 1st round of std's and then see if that gives you room to invite more with the real invite.