18 year old married couple

Ehh it kinda depends I guess. Usually I'd say no because you gotta experience life, you'll change, and I think its important to learn how to live and take care of yourself first. It doesn't sound so bad until you actually jump out and do it. Too many of my friends that married at 18 or 19 divorced within 2 years because they felt tied down, the spouse changed, they wanted to live life a little wildly, or the spouse cheated. It always exploded into a huge problem because they also rushed into other aspects in life, like having kids, multiple pets, or whatever else that would require dividing up between the two.

On the other hand, I've seen some younger couples marry and it went great. The youngest I can think of was 20 yrs old. They moved in with their SO right after they graduated high school and married 2 years later. They seem to be doing fine. Granted, one was slightly older and already had experience living on their own and had life figured out a little better, so they were able to help their SO.

I still lean towards a no on marrying so young though. I think it's okay to get engaged and push the wedding out at least 2 years so there's time to get your adult lives together before making a huge commitment.

I cannot imagine being married to the boy I was dating when I was 18! It was real and it was love - but I was an entirely different person.

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I really love this reply. Everyone grows up and matures so differently. Some of us have been working since 16 and moved out before 18. I think there are many 18 year old's that are so much mature than 21 year old's.

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Actually, I am 19. My partner and I have both gone through multiple losses in our immediate family in the time that we have been together. We have our own jobs that we work close to full time at and I moved out of my home to a new state when I was newly 18. This means embarking on a long distance relationship while still in school and joining the military. I have budgeted living alone for almost two years now, meaning I had to figure out what is for dinner when I am by myself and when I have my partner with me. We budget through trips to see each other and obviously, a wedding now. Out of the nine "milestones" you just mentioned, we have gone through seven in the length of our relationship, plus some you didn't even think about. These experiences may be just those that my partner and I have experienced together, but there are plenty of other young adults and couples who have gone through just as much, if not more. There are plenty of young people who have endured many hardships in their short time and their experiences should not be invalidated by those who say we are too young to experience hardships.

Personally I would wait. A person is at 18 is not the same person they are a few years later. You will change and grow from life experiences. At 18 You haven't had adult responsibilities or experiences. There's so much involved including schooling, career, financial independence, to name a few. At 18 you're still young & you have your whole life ahead of you. A few more years together, growing & experiencing life isn't that much longer to wait. If it's meant to be, it will be.

I really think it depends on the person, but to me, 18 is a little premature. Here's why: I feel like there are a lot of 18 year olds who really are blind to the world around them -- and not because of their own doing! But life after high school/college is so, so different from life in school, and I think your perspectives will change after you go through those milestones. For that reason, I would wait until you've been out on your own, working full time, and really doing your own thing as an adult (not in a dorm, following other people's rules) before getting married.

I guess the highlight here is you need to know what life is like when you're on your own -- not following some arbitrary rules -- before you get married. I feel like a lot of people who get married young don't realize that there is life beyond curfews and not being allowed to do stuff. You really don't know what it feels like to be independent until you're experiencing it for yourself, and until you get that, I don't think you're ready.

Because you're asking, I'm sort of thinking that you're still trying to "follow the rules." You aren't being an adult and making your own decisions -- you're asking if other people think it's okay. That's a sign of youth and innocence -- keep it as long as you can. But don't get married until you've jumped over the hurdle into being a confident, independent (wo)man.

That's just my two cents, but I'm not a good example. I have 2 college degrees, FH is an EMT who is working on getting his paramedic's certificate, we own a home, both work full-time making more than any of our parents (not that money = worth, but that shows how hard we've worked to be successful), and have been together for 4 years. Our wedding is in 57 days. We're 20. Timelines are different for everyone, I guess. But you'll know when you're ready, and you won't have to ask.

I think 18 is definitely too young. Heck, I think 20 is probably too young. This from someone who came very close to getting married at 20 and moving across the country. FH was Army and honestly all of his buddies who got married young had terrible relationships - abusive, adulterous, you name it. His leadership said that he was the only one they would actually approve of getting married so young but I insisted we wait. (If he’d reenlisted we probably would’ve gotten married at 21/22). There are exceptions, but I don’t think most 18 year olds are financially, emotionally, or psychologically ready to get married and it shows in the divorce rates.

View Quoted Comment This is basically what we all know but are sometimes too stubborn in our own thoughts to say. Well put.

Personally, I wouldn’t get married at 18. But I’m also only 22 (23 at wedding) so who am I to talk? Part of me feels that I’m not actually that much older than 18, but I also wouldn’t have wanted to get married even at 21. A lot happens in a year or two. Also, my brother and his girlfriend are 20 and 18 and it horrifies me to think of them getting married. He has a career, runs a small business, and is pretty good with general life skill, but he’s not socially immature to a point. And she’s in high school with no real responsibilities that I know of, despite being an overall responsible girl. They are so not there right now and shouldn’t be for a while.

In the end, everyone is different and I can see both sides. It’s really a more complex topic than it seems on the surface, especially when the question of raising children (for those who want that after marriage) is added into it, which is a contributing factor, or at least related topic, for many couples.

The original poster did not even return lmao!!!

View Quoted Comment I definitely agree with you on this

To me, it depends on experience, not age. Someone once told me that if you love someone, wait until you see how they act when they're angry and that will make the decision for you whether you should stay together or not.

And as for being 18 and experienced...I dk why everyone is fighting. I know some 18 year olds that have gone to 3rd world countries to help the needy, speak 3 languages, have started their nursing degree on a paid scholorship and so forth. When I was younger I had been around so many drugs, so much violence, my mother physically and emotionally abusing me, sexual assault, I had a boyfriend I was deeply in love with who destroyed my heart....and I know people who are 40 years old that can't even imagine the things i've seen. I have been told by many people I am so mature for my age and when I was 16 people thought I was 20-22 already. When people see you as older, they treat you as an adult so you can imagine the experiences I had.

Bottom line, my best advice is wait until you've experienced a heartbreak. It will teach you that even those you see as perfect little angels are only human and can lie, and teach you how you should be treated in a real relationship. If you marry the first guy you date, chances are you'll think everything he does to you is how a relationship is supposed to be and you won't learn your worth. Just my opinion.

View Quoted Comment Truly well said. Thank you💖

I don’t recommended it from personal experience. I got married at 20, baby at 21 and 25 and divorced at 27. We had a wonderful relationship, never fought. He ended up having an affair luckily I had a career going for me. We both changed so much from 20 to 30. But to each their own, hopefully it’ll work out for you just make sure you have your own career so if it hits the fan you can take care of yourself.