12 days to go and ready to be done!

Your aggravation would be very real if there wasn't a pandemic going on right now, but unfortunately you are definitely going to have to feel those feelings, probably cry it out (I know I have had a few crying sessions about everything) but then let those feelings go, a lot of people thought things would be getting better right now and that's probably why they RSVP'd but in most places it is just getting worse. I get it, all of this costs so much money, but you can't blame people for trying to protect themselves and their families.

Unfortunately, I think if you go forward with wedding plans during this pandemic, situations like these are one of those things you’re just going to have to deal with. This virus is so unpredictable. I’m sure everyone thought that by this time it would be completely under control. And I am sure many of your guests assumed when they RSVPed that the pandemic would be over; or at least better controlled than it is. They were likely waiting till the last minute in hopes that things would get better and they would feel safe attending. The only thing you can do at this point is focus on the positives (You will soon be married, and at least they RSVPed before your numbers we’re due!), and remember that these people are choosing not to attend strictly due to health and safety reasons.

View Quoted Comment I totally understand the health and safety reasons. (Frustrates, yes. But I do get it.
I just needed to rant) I think i wouldn’t be so by the brother If there wasn’t way more to the story than just covid. But that’s for another day. FH gave him an out months ago (pre-covid) when he complained about everything related to being a groomsman but he’d just ignore 🤷🏼‍♀️ So yeah, I’m a little frustrated that after all that he bailed now. He only rsvp’d 3 weeks ago and it was a yes. So I have a hard time believing that he thought the situation would be changing drastically in 3 weeks.

I do Know in the end that I will marry my best friend and that’s all that matters. I did choose to move forward with the wedding during the pandemic so I know I have to accept the outcome but I think people did know before now that the situation wasn’t as vastly improved as they thought it may be in June.

View Quoted Comment I know there were definitely some hits we’d take
Moving forward. I suppose I just feel that people knew before now (12 days out) what the situation was. I know in many places a lot has changed very quickly and resurges have happened seemingly overnight, but in Maryland (where we are located) our situation has been pretty stagnant for a couple of months. Even 2 weeks ago would have seen a bit
More considerate. I’m not so upset by the peopleChoosing not to come due to health concerns, I’d never want someone to come and be uncomfortable to make me happy. I am more bothered by the last minute nature. I supposeMaybe it was just an effort to hold out as long as possible.

Hi Sarah
My fiancé and I are getting married in sept and also going through the same thing. We unfortunately can not really delay the wedding any further bc we want to have a baby after and are not spring chickens anymore. Meaning the longer we wait the longer our chances.
I’m sure all of our family doesn’t realize that and thinks we should just move it and avoid the hassle but the thing is if we move it out a few more months who’s to say things get better. I’m in NY and things are pretty good here but only my family is scared and mostly bc of the guests traveling to be here. I am an essential worker and have been in the heart of this pandemic since day one. Believe me when I say that we are taking all necessary precautions, open barn and tent wedding social distanced seating, provided masks and sanitizer everywhere. I don’t know what else we can do. My brothers wife and my niece and nephews are not coming now and all of them were in the wedding party so I completely get it. And it’s bc they can’t stay longer if they make them quarantine when entering the state. It’s just been a mess. And same as you I get the fear but the lacy of communication between family members is insane. And now the house we were going to be staying in together is not happening bc they all aren’t coming. Nightmare. It’s suppose to be the happiest most beautiful day and right now we’re both so sad and beyond exhausted!. Mentally. Emotionally F*** Covid 👊🏼 I feel your pain and hope it all works out and that you have an amazing wedding! Stay safe and good luck

Also check out this Message a friend sent to us. It might help you. We posted it on FB to all our guests. Just so maybe they could try and put our feelings into consideration.
https://seedsofwhitezinniahome.wpcomstaging.com/2020/07/17/a-friendly-psa-from-a-tired-2020-bride/

Omg that's so frustrating! I'm sure everyone was more hopeful when you first sent out the invites, that this wasn't going to be "such a problem" but come on people. It's less than 2 weeks away and people are telling you NOW that they don't want to go? As if 2 weeks ago they didn't think things would be how they are now?
I totally get having your wedding still and getting married, that's you and your s/o's day and should get married when you want to, no shame at all.
I think some of these guests are a little foolish to RSVP then rescind shortly after. Don't let these bumps in the road get you down, do what you two can and enjoy your day, hopefully there's smoother sailing for you!

View Quoted Comment Yes! This sums up how I’m feeling. FH and i are in the same position. We aren’t spring chickens and would like to start a family. It’s not something I’m going to broadcast to “justify” our day to our guests. But it is what it is. I get the fear, I don’t get the lacy communication. I deactivated the RSVP on my wedding website because some were rescinding without any explanation and (quite frankly) this late in the game i found it kind of rude. People can obviously (and will) rescind if they don’t feel safe but we are well past the deadline so I feel it’s fair to deactivate the ability to click a button and change it so easily. I loved the link you shared too. I’m going to share it on my Facebook as well. I know I chose to have a weddinf during a pandemic (inadvertently) and I get it. But it doesn’t mean I should be laced with guilt for having my big day.

View Quoted Comment Yes! This is my point. In Maryland things have been pretty stagnant for 2 months. Things didn’t suddenly change this week. I wouldn’t have even been so frustrated had the rescinded 2 weeks ago. It’s the last minute nature over a situation that’s been around for months that’s getting to me.

View Quoted Comment Couldn’t agree more. Just carry on with your day as is. Make safe arrangements as you can. We have some family that have pre existing conditions that are the only ones that are worried so some aren’t coming and some we are supplying N95 masks if they want, seating outside and separate with only the family members they’ve been around immediate and such.
See if we move it a couple of months then it will be cold and then everyone is stuck inside and close to eachother with no chances for social distancing band the pandemic has to chance to re surface here. It feels safer to do it now knowing where we’re at the. To take the chance of it getting worse.
So as of right now. We are just hoping for the best and trying to be understanding. And still waiting on half the responses.
I don’t think I will put that option on the website either. I’d rather a phone call. It would seem rude to me as well.

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Actually, things are getting worse in Maryland, despite what Hogan is trying to make people believe with the numbers. As infection rates rise so will hospitalizations it just lags. Several counties are urging Hogan to roll back restrictions to what Phase I was. They apparently came together and wrote a letter and it basically said if he doesn't do something they will. My fiance is a resident in a hospital and said it isn't as stagnant as people thing, they are seeing more COVID patients come in. People from Maryland also are on NJ/NY/CT mandatory quarantine list as of yesterday. So that shows states that are doing well don't want us coming. I have a wedding at the end of August and my RSVP's aren't due for another 2 weeks but I am closely monitoring the situation and know there is a chance things will close again.

I don't want to be a downer but I am in your situation and can't be mad at people. Things are constantly changing and maybe they felt comfortable 2 weeks ago but now they don't. I tried to postpone mine but my venue said no. So part of me does hope he rolls back so I don't have to have a wedding and the other part just wants it over.

View Quoted Comment I suppose we are all entitled to feel the way we’d like about it. However, I’ve been watching the numbers literally every single day since March 13. In spite of your feelings about Hogan, numbers are numbers. Is there a slight increase? Sure. But I also know back when we were seeing 300 new cases a day, only 6-7,000 negatives were being returned a day. Now, we had a few days at 800-900 new positives but **** negative tests were returned. Today, nearly 18,000 tests were returned...627 were positive and over 17,000 were negative. I’m no statistician but I’d say those are pretty good numbers when
You’re looking @ percentage of positives. Places that are surging are seeing upwards of 10k cases a day. Hogan has also said (per the Washington post) that the increases are isolated to the center of the state and he doesn’t feel the need to scale back reopening in the whole state as a result. Each county can do what they want. He’s always said that. I’m in southern Maryland. We’ve had less than 500 cases all time. I actually remember you commenting on a post of mine before and you told me that I was basically out of my mind for wanting to have my wedding and no way Hogan would Reopen anything. The next day he reopened practically everything. We are all entitled to our views on things.


To clarify, we are proving indoor and outdoor seating, the ceremony (in a small indoor church) is limited to family/bridal party. We are providing masks, sanitizer, and sitting people by house holds. The venue at 50% is 120. We are at 95. Full capacity is 240. We are also providing outdoor games and activities for those who are more comfortable outside. As PP said regarding her wedding, there’s nothing more we can do to ensure safety.

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Yes, I have commented on your posts. This website has a ton of useful information https://covidactnow.org/state/MD?s=748129. I do live in a much more populated area then you I assume which is why I feel very differently. I don't want a wedding where people are coming from all over the country and can be that one person to infect people. But I also don't have upwards of $40,000 to postpone or cancel so I'm out of luck. But regardless, my point was you can't be annoyed at guests for changing their minds when you're having a wedding during a pandemic. You said you didn't pay for them coming so I honestly don't see the big deal. You need to just focus on the people coming.