#1 Stressor - money

Hey Brook!
June 2020 bride here.
Our original budget was $10k
We quickly realized that wasn't feasible.
With venue, catering, DJ, officiant, photographer, and Honeymoon we were right at that point.
So, fiancee decided on a firm $15k max.
I'm hoping to come in a little under, but 🤷🤞

Good luck planning and congratulations!

Ask friends to borrow things aha I had no shame in asking my friends if I could borrow stuff so I could minimize the amount of things I'd need to spend on.
Don't be afraid to negotiate things for a better deal.
Ok so what I always tell people is at the end of the day... Even if you didn't have anything other than the dinner, THATS TOTALLY OK. Everyone there is celebrating you and so all these extras like party favors and photobooths and decor are just things we think as a host would be nice but the guests really just are there to be with you so going simple would still be sweet

View Quoted Comment Same with us.. Started at 10k and we can't go over 15.. been a bit stressful trying to figure it out because we ended up inviting more people than I wanted to (FH family friends) so everything is costing more 😂🤷

I was once told to pick what your priorities are when it comes to the wedding (ours was venue and photographer) and then figure out the rest. You'd be surprised at how many wedding related things are on Facebook Marketplace. Small things like favors, aren't necessary. You don't need opulent centerpieces (or flowers at all), guests don't really care.

View Quoted Comment Yes... I haven't even explained that I have to get my dress altered or mentioned all the small things her...just easing him into it it is stressful...no need for a wedding diet...weight is just falling off.
We can do it! Keep me posted

The biggest money saver is to keep your guest count low. If you have a smaller guest list then you can pick a less expensive venue, and you'll in general need less of everything. Our budget is $20K but we are getting a lot of help from our families (about half). That number also doesn't include our honeymoon. I've decided that gets it's own budget lol

The cost depends mostly on your location. A big city like LA, New York, Chicago, San Francisco, etc. are going to have vendors that charge a lot more than rural areas or cities with a lower cost of living.

I'm from the LA area, we are having a 275-300 person formal wedding at an all inclusive banquet hall ($65pp) with plated multi-course dinner, "open bar" (alcohol on the table), DJ, real flowers, favors, videographer(2) & photographer(2) 12+ hours, 12 person bridal party, 5 tier cake, pro hair and makeup, the whole 9 yards for over 60k.

We could have definitely cut down costs by cutting the guest list, having it at a cheaper venue/catering, no alcohol, no DJ, lower package photographer, no favors, fake or no flowers, no bridal party, small cake, DIY hair and makeup. But we weren't willing to compromise.

People plan wonderful weddings all the time on a budget and these forums are great for ideas.

Catering is the most expensive part of a wedding so keeping your guest count low is the best way to keep a low budget. DIYing decorations and buying a dress on sale help but it’s not where the majority of the budget is. Venue/food/alcohol generally take up 50-60% of your entire budget. So start there and figure out what food cost per person is at your venue or with your preferred caterer and then you’ll know how many you can invite to stay in budget.

Yes, I think a lot of that "average" cost comes from a large guest list. We are trying to keep our guest count at no more than 100, and of course we tried to get the best deals on venue pricing/catering, etc. We originally thought we could do it for $10K, but after starting our research we realized that was not going to be enough for what we wanted. So, we're thinking $15k should do it, and like others here, trying to come in a bit under that. I think we'll make it. I've already cut out some stuff that will cost money, but won't enhance our day at all, so that made those things unnecessary, like favors, programs, etc.

If you're on Facebook, check out wedding resale groups and budget bride groups. One of the big reasons that we chose the venue we did is because they have a huge amount of decorations and centerpieces we can use for free. Lighting is also included and can be customized to our wedding colors. A couple of other venues I saw will do that too! Check out Costco and Sams club for flowers. If you have a friend or know someone with a Cricut machine- you can buy card stock and design all of you invites/save the dates/menus/programs yourself. We're not spending money on favors to cut some costs there. I feel as though they're pretty pointless. For my cousins wedding, instead of having a videographer, they had one really fun family member with a gopro and a selfie stick. It was amazing. They also had a family friend dj for them with I think an i-pod that they put a bunch of songs on that they liked or something. I also know that they made all of their deserts.

DIY is not always less expensive! One way I saved money is by not having large bouquets or caring about specific flowers. I got a dress for 200 dollars that I loved. My shoes, veil and jewelry cost under 50 dollars. My DH wore a suit/shoes he already owned. We did not have ceremony decor but our ceremony was on a deck surrounded by trees and waterfalls. Decor and themes can be a huge waste of money. We had a smallish wedding of about 71 people. However, we did not skimp on food, alcohol, entertainment, HMU, photography, etc. We paid for things for our BP that most wouldn't. I haven't totaled everything yet but I know before tips and last minute purchases, we were around 19k.

Have the wedding you want that you can afford. Weddings are expensive!

I originally hoped to spend $5000 to $7000 for the wedding. We are going to come in right at $10000 for everything. We cut the guest list just to get to that number. Its tough, but it can be done.

My husband and I just got married on June 8th. We had our ceremony at our church and our reception at our local fire hall. The fire hall has there own chef and all we had to do with bring in our own alcohol, wedding cake and do a little decorating. It was affordable, were not in debt and we had the time of our lives. Our Budget was $10,000 we were under budget at $7,200 to be exact after calculations.

My best advice is research, research, research. A lot of the budget creep happens because you get your heart set on something without knowing the realistic cost. If you take the time to do your research and create a line-by-line budget before you start really planning it will be easier to stick to the budget.

And then just be honest about what is a need vs a want.

It really depends on what you value as non-negotiables, your guest list, the venue you pick, etc. There are definitely ways to scrimp and save, but it comes with the cost of maybe not having your "dream" pinterest-board wedding. FH and I will come out around of under 10k when it's all said and done, and that came with a lot of compromises and a TON of DIYs and honestly a lot of stress.

It depends on what you mean by the "average" couple. The issues here are that a) the median is very different than the mean, and b) couples who get surveyed probably spend more than couples who don't.

For an example of the first issue, suppose that four couples each spend $10,000 on their weddings. Couple #5 spends $105,000. The average is now $29,000. However, 80% of the couples have spent much less than $29,000. You certainly don't need to spend $29,000 to have a wedding. While those numbers are made up, something like it definitely happens. a few Platinum weddings will raise the "average" much higher than what most couples spend.

Also, think about who is being surveyed. The person who has a courthouse wedding, followed by dinner for immediate family, isn't on a wedding forum or paying attention to wedding surveys. The person who spends a couple of years planning a large wedding is overrepresented. So the average cost found in those surveys is going to be a lot higher than what the average person spends.

It really depends what’s a priority to you. Here are the places we splurged vs the places we cut, and how much everything cost... this list of priorities may not be the same for you, but just to give you an idea:
Places we spent a decent amount:
-beautiful venue - $1750
-food, and inviting everyone we wanted- $68 per person, invited 147 but 98 attended
-photography - $2000
-videography - $930

Places we saved:
-officiant - my brother got ordained online! It was better than anyone we could’ve hired! - $0
-flowers - got my bouquet from a florist ($70) DIYd bridesmaid bouquets from grocery store ($30 total) - no other flowers
-decor - our venue was gorgeous, didn’t need it! - $0
-centerpieces - a nice touch, but they’re not going to be missed! Put a few candles and a table number and call it! (Our venue provided these, so $0)
-favors - not necessary - $0
-DJ - best man ran the Spotify playlist (and I helped... it was fun!) -$10 for 1 month of Spotify

And somewhere in the middle...
-cake - $600 (about average)
-my dress - $550 (this was important of course, but my $550 dress was just as gorgeous as many of the $2000 dresses)
-alcohol - definitely wanted to provide it but since our wedding was a Sunday afternoon it wasn’t a HUGE priority. We served wine only and set a $2200 cap, which lasted until the last hour of the reception (then it turned to a cash bar)

Oh also I should add... I did my own makeup, and my hair cost $150.

One of my bridesmaids (who is a professional hair stylist) did hair and makeup for the other bridesmaids, so that didn’t cost them anything either.

We set a budget for about $16k. We are not planning on going over that. The cost of your wedding be the budget that you have set for your wedding and what you decide are the important things that you would like to have for your wedding. Also, doing diy projects and searching reasonable priced details for your wedding. My venue and food were my biggest cost. Now I have to shop reasonably for everything else that I need for my wedding. One of best things to do is to shop around and get the best price.

If we went over budget it wasnt by too much. We planned $15k and the budget sheet I had was at around $13k and I know it didnt account for everything we had. Some things got missed here and there, and I don't know how much my in laws spent on the RD catering.