Walking me down the aisle
I'm curious to see what other brides are doing in this arena. I am getting married for the second time, and I had children in my first marriage. My parents have been a great help to me, but my fiance and I are paying for the wedding and I've never been very close with my father. Since it is my second marriage, I'm in my late 20s, and I'm a mother myself, I'm kind of at a loss as to how I should process down the aisle. Should I walk alone? Should I have my dad or both my parents walk me down? Should my children walk me down? Any ideas, advice, or sharing would be appreciated!

Married: 05/10/2008
Posted On: Jul 13, 2007 at 3:28 AM • Vendors are allowed • Add to My WatchlistFlag As Inappropriate2 likes

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Dawn G.

DLHG Photography
Jul 13, 2007 at 4:36 PM • Flag As Inappropriate
At my wedding my parents escorted me to the beginning of the aisle. Then my husband walked down & met us there. We didn't do the "who gives this bride". My dad surprised us with a quick little speech & then they walked up the aisle. Then after a moment we walked up the aisle together & lit the unity candle. We did this to symbolize how we're both making this move together, side by side the whole way.

Here's some other ways I've seen it done:
Bride & groom walk up together from the get go. All parents were seated during the procession.

The children walk up the aisle first, and then the bride walks up alone.

The children escort the bride up the aisle, but depending on how many you have... The younger children walk just ahead of you, and the eldest escorts you down the aisle.

Or, a slight twist on the classic, have both parents escort you up.

This is one of those situations that there's really no wrong answer. :)

Married: 05/10/2008
Jul 15, 2007 at 4:00 AM • Flag As Inappropriate
Thank you for the suggestions! I hadn't thought about some of the options, so that gives me more to contemplate. When I was married the first time, both of my parents walked me down the aisle, which was nice. Because we're involving our kids a lot in the ceremony, I wanted to somehow incorporate them, so we'll see what I end up doing. Thanks!

Married: 06/10/2006
Reviews: 14
Jul 15, 2007 at 4:18 PM • Flag As Inappropriate
Think about who will be 'giving you away.' If your parents no longer provide for you as they did before your first wedding, I don't think they need to be the ones to escort you down.

I think it would be great if your kids walked with you. It's very symbolic and sweet to show how your two families are combining into one (not just you two as a couple).

Don't forget you can also always walk alone! That might be a good alternative if you don't want your kids to walk with you.

Married: 07/12/2008
Jul 17, 2007 at 5:16 PM • Flag As Inappropriate
My good friend walked his mother down the aisle at her second wedding. It was very special for both of them. I think it's wonderful that you're including them so much in the ceremony :)
Jul 24, 2007 at 2:04 PM • Flag As Inappropriate
Congratulations on your engagement!

A lot of second time brides have this concern, so you are not alone. Since you have children from your previous marriage, and you are not close to your father, I would suggest that your children escort you down the isle.

If I many make this suggestion for ceremony wording: Don’t have the minister/offciant ask the question “who gives this woman to be married”, simply have them escort you down the isle, give you a kiss good bye, and stand on the appropriate side. That will include them in a very important way in the ceremony as well as take care of the fact that your father may not be the person you choose to walk you down the isle.

Many brides choose to walk down the isle alone since they have been independent of their parents for quite a while. A lot of the traditions that we do in the wedding ceremony can be changed to fit the needs of a more modern bride, without “breaking the rules” of the tradition – all the best!
Jul 26, 2007 at 5:25 PM • Flag As Inappropriate
My friend has 3 sons & they walked her down the aisle. She started off with one son then switched to the 2nd then the 3rd took her to the alter. Then her daughter was her maid of honor. I also think it would be nice for both parents to walk you down.
Aug 01, 2007 at 7:48 PM • Flag As Inappropriate
Walking together with you fiancé is not something out of the question. It is the ultimate demonstration of partnership, commitment and independence. If you are one of the brides who are aiming to break with tradition this could be a good route.
Sep 18, 2007 at 7:24 PM • Flag As Inappropriate
I recently photographed a second wedding. The brides 12 y.o. son walked her down, her 16y.o. daughter was the maid of honor. The grooms son and new stepson were his best/groomsmen. And his daughter was the flower girl.

It was touching and there wasn't a dry eye in the house. They wanted the day to be about two families becoming one.
Oct 10, 2007 at 11:50 PM • Flag As Inappropriate
If you decide to have your fiance walk you down the aisle and not your children then I have a suggestion on how to incorporate them into the ceremony. Have them light the unity candles (if you are doing this) with both your husband and yourself. As a way to incorporate my and my fiances children into our wedding besides one being the ring bearer and one the flower girl we done the unity candle to symbolize the blending of our two families becoming one.

Married: 09/27/2008
Reviews: 5
Nov 02, 2007 at 1:10 AM • Flag As Inappropriate
This also isn't my first wedding, I've been widowed once and divorced, so my 3rd wedding. I am 40 and my oldest daughter is going to be my matron of honor, my youngest daughter lives out of state, but if she makes it back for the wedding wants to help in some way, my fh and I have a little boy who will be our ring bearer (he's 3 will be 4) and he will also be walking me down the aisle, when the officiant asks who is giving me away, my daughter(s) will respond with her children do. I hope this helps.
Like you, we are paying for our wedding ourselves also.
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