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Beginner June 2009

Maid Of Honor...Sister or Best Friend?

Haitianbeauty, on January 26, 2008 at 12:24 AM Posted in Planning 0 9

It would be great to have both as my maid of honor, but im not sure if that exist. my sister and i are very close and, she was always there for me and my hubby. My best friend was there in the begining, but now we are not as close as we were. im not sure why. i told her that she might not be my maid of honor, she seem disappointed. should i feel guilty, or did i make the right decision??

9 Comments

Latest activity by evergeneva, on February 13, 2008 at 1:21 PM
  • Christina
    Expert July 2007
    Christina ·
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    You do what you think is best, afterall it is your decision. She can always be a bridesmaid, which is just as important as the MOH. When I first got enganged I decided not to have a MOH because both of my sisters wanted to be it and also my bestfriend. I thought the whole thing was ridiculous so originally I had only bridesmaid. It wasn't till like 4 months prior that I decided to make my older sister my maid of honor, but they weren't mad, they were maybe a little relieved that they didn't have to have such a big responsibility. I always think your MOH should be the one you feel closest to, if you can't decide then you don't have to have one, its not a requirement afterall.

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  • Bames
    Just Said Yes May 2008
    Bames ·
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    If you were still close to your best friend then I'd say best friend for MOH. Your sister is family and will always love you and be there for you. I just had to make that decision and went with my best friend because I knew she would have more time to dedicate to me and the wedding and my needs and she would really take the job seriously ya know? Not that my sister wouldn't, but family tends to do more what they want than what you want sometimes.

    Good luck!

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  • L
    Dedicated July 2008
    LaZea ·
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    For me, I have two maid of honors and four bridesmaids. One of my MOH had a fit because she felt she should be the only one and just as important. Very selfish I think. But I told her that I was "honoring" both of them for the roles they played in my life. Yes, I knew her since we were kids and much longer, but she's not locally here (she's in Californian, I'm in Texas) and been here for me like my other MOH. We argued about if for a week. She said she'll just a greeter than or just a bridesmaid. I told her she was NOT going to ruin my day, nor was she going to make me "choose" who was more important in my life. She got over it since I stuck to my guns. It's really awful to have to be in this type of position. Especially with others trying to MAKE you do something that your really don't want to. Just remember, it's your day, YOU'RE paying for the day, and they need to respect your decisions.

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  • Soon2BeMrs.G
    Savvy October 2009
    Soon2BeMrs.G ·
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    If you only have one sister, i would definitely go with having your sister as your maid of honor. (if you only want one, it's your wedding, if u want 2, that's up to you). If she is not your only sister, then to be fair I wouldnt have one over the other. If your bf and u are not as close as you were, that is another reason not to have her, family will always be family, but friends may go away. I had this same dilema when choosing, im super close with my bf, and have 2 sisters, i was not my sisters, so i did go with my bf. But...my bf only has one sister, so i expect her to have her. It is completely up to you!!! Whoever u think will be there for you the most is who you should have!!! Smiley smile It's a BIG job!!

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  • momof2boyz
    Just Said Yes April 2008
    momof2boyz ·
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    I'm kind of in the same situation. I stopped talking to my best friend for months. We're talking again and when I talk about my sister being my maid of honor (since my best friend and I weren't talking while I was doing most of my planning), she seems disappointed that I don't cancel out on my sister. Problem with my wedding is, is that we're only having one person stand up for each of us. If you feel closer to your sister, that is who should be your maid of honor. My fiance said that your sister will always be your family, friends come and go. You don't want to regret it in the future. I had a girl be my bridesmaid in my previous wedding and I don't talk to her at all and I regret having her in my pictures that I'm saving for my son. Do what you feel is best and you won't feel any regrets later on. Good luck, I hope what I had to say helped.

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  • tifne
    Savvy May 2008
    tifne ·
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    When it comes down to it, you need to be the one happy with your decision. While there may be hurt feelings when you first make the choice, if these girls are really good friends to you, they will support your decision...because it is YOUR decision.

    The best thing you can do is make a choice that you won't regret later.

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  • C
    Beginner June 2007
    Christina ·
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    You are allowed to have 2 maids of honor if you want, this way you can split responsibility between them and let them jointly plan your wedding shower and other events. I personally made my best friend my matron of honor, but she and I are really close, and have been friends since the 6th grade. If you are closer with your sister, simply make her the maid of honor, but give your best friend some things to do to show her that she is needed too. She should understand how close you are with your sister.

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  • Ms Blackanes 25
    Savvy June 2009
    Ms Blackanes 25 ·
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    You have to remember that THIS IS YOUR WEDDING! If you want two maid of honors then you do that. I'm also torn on who should be my maid of honor so they both will do the job. On the other hand that is your sister, she (your friend) should understand that you want your sister to be your maid of honor.

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  • evergeneva
    Devoted September 2009
    evergeneva ·
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    I was the MOH for my best friend and she also asked another friend to be her MOH, so she had two. It took a lot of the stress off of me because we could split the duties, like I planned the shower and the other MOH planned the bachelorette party, and we could be 2 places at once! For my own wedding, I am not having any attendants, and my sister and best friend were really bummed about that, so I can see how your friend or sister might feel, but I say the more, the merrier!

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