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Expert March 2021

Would you send a gift?

Marcia, on July 24, 2020 at 5:01 PM Posted in Etiquette and Advice 0 10

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I have two weddings I won't be attending, and I'm wondering if you all would send a gift to either or both?

1. Friend having a large wedding during covid that I don't feel comfortable attending
2. Cousin who isn't speaking to me after a big falling out but invited me on her mother's request
I know I have a year from the event date to decide, but I am curious what everyone thinks

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10 Comments

Latest activity by Kari, on July 25, 2020 at 3:21 PM

Legend November 2019
Caytlyn · on July 24, 2020 at 5:03 PM
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If I was close to friend #1, I would send a gift. I wouldn't send a gift to the cousin.
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Master October 2020
Yasmine · on July 24, 2020 at 5:03 PM
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I would most definitely send a gift for the first one. I honestly probably would for the second one also.
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Devoted May 2021
Jess · on July 24, 2020 at 5:04 PM
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Agreed. I would do the same.
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Master October 2022
Jana · on July 24, 2020 at 5:09 PM
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Send a gift to friend. Send cousin a card (no gift, no cash).
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Legend June 2019
Melle · on July 24, 2020 at 5:12 PM
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I like PP suggestion of sending a gift to the first wedding and a card to the second
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Super October 2020
Eri · on July 24, 2020 at 5:14 PM
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1 yes, 2 no.
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Master 0000
Judith · on July 24, 2020 at 5:24 PM
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Anyone I feel close to, I give a gift and best wishes when they marry, whether I witness it or not. Anyone I don't feel close to, I decline any party invitations, and any invitation to the wedding, and send neither a card or gift. So yes #1 and No #2
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VIP August 2020
· on July 24, 2020 at 8:12 PM
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Yes to the friend. No to the cousin, but I'd send a card if I still had a relationship with other members of her immediate family.
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Legend March 2017
Pirate & 60s Bride · on July 25, 2020 at 3:16 PM
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I’d just send a card to each.
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Master May 2020
Kari · on July 25, 2020 at 3:21 PM
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I'd send a gift if you feel close to the people getting married, wish you could attend their wedding but can't, and/or can think of something you'd really like to gift them.
I would not at all feel obligated to send a gift to a person who I didn't have a strong relationship with, regardless of their reason for inviting me to their wedding.
As long as you RSVP by the deadline (or sooner, if you can) that is the only thing you are really required to do, and shows plenty of consideration for the couple, even if you don't send a gift.
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Would you send a gift?

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