Would you be upset if your spouse went to a strip club?

That’s a discussion each couple has to have on their own. It’s not cheating unless the customer is asking for the dancer’s number to meet up after hours

I wouldn’t be mad at all! I think honestly, it could be a sense of insecurity from the woman’s side. And this is just my opinion. My now wife had her bachelor party at the strip club and we have also gone together multiple times. I don’t think there’s anything wrong with attending. However, I do know some women would be opposed.

View Quoted Comment I agree with you. I think if it's a regular occurrence or they agree to meet up with a striper outside the club then yes it seems they have other intentions.

I used to not care, but after I worked at a strip club and saw exactly what went on on the DL… now I would never be ok with my man going

View Quoted Comment I feel the same way you do. I feel like it is extreme to force your spouse to not attend a batchlor party just because your worried they might hit up a strip club.

View Quoted Comment Agreed! And it should really be about celebration.

I think it’s completely wrong for either myself or my now husband to go to a strip club. We both agree with each other on that subject. Honestly it’s different for everyone… We aren’t jealous or anything it’s just something we aren’t into.

I'm with Cece. I know what goes on there if you have enough ca$h. I don't think people realize what is actually possible, particularly with "private" shows.

Having said that, I don't think it's up to any of us to determine what someone else should be comfortable with. It's between the couple and should be respected.

It’s definitely a decision that is unique to each couple. I personally don’t mind if my husband goes to a strip club because I have complete trust in him. Yes, some shady things can happen at strip clubs, but the buyer is usually throwing down quite a bit of cash for that, and I know my husband well enough to know he isn’t going to do that. He isn’t a fan of them but has gone a few times for bachelor parties and he usually comes home and tells me how ridiculous it was and what some of the guys got up to. I mean, if he was going regularly and spending a bunch of money, I would probably be more concerned. As it is now, he usually texts me that he’s bored while there and once when he was in Vegas while we were dating, he called me to chat while everyone else in the group was inside the building. I didn’t even know he was at a strip club until I asked him what he was up to.

View Quoted Comment Yes, I was just talking to my husband about this and he said he has never been offered anything like a BJ or something outside the club but he said if you have enough cash more could happen. I'm surprised because I thought they have rules lol

View Quoted Comment I agree with you. My husband is very similar lol he tells me what happens lol

View Quoted Comment Oh trust me, it does not end with BJs. The list goes on and on. There ARE rules, but it doesn’t seem to matter (and I worked at a very high class place with strict rules). The girls there would play “games” where they got certain amounts of points for talking guys into things, and the points doubled if they were married. I’ve seen guys call their girlfriends/wives and lie to them about where they are or how much money they are spending. Or they tell them “they’re bored”, they “didn’t even want to come here, but so-and-so made them”, or “I've got better at home, so why would i want to look at these girls?”…. Then hang up and high five their buddies and immediately go into a private room with a dancer. It was so bad. I could tell the most disgusting, disrespectful and heartbreaking stories of men in strip clubs who have girlfriends and wives.

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Yep. I seriously don't care what other people do, but people who think they know what really goes on just do not. I've worked in health care for far too long not to see that.

You never know what might trigger someone emotionally and why.

I've just made it a rule for myself not to decide for other people what is appropriate for them. The cultural pressure about bachelorette and bachelor parties doesn't make it easy I'm sure.

View Quoted Comment Totally agree. Prior to working in the industry (my boyfriend at the time was a bouncer at a well-known club, so our schedules were basically opposite of each other and we never saw each other. So I took a job as a cocktail waitress there so we could actually see each other/have similar schedules), I didn’t think much of guys going to strip clubs. It seemed like harmless fun. But once I saw how “good guys” acted there once the testosterone and booze were flowing and they were being egged on by their buddies, I decided that would not be a part of any relationship going forward for me. Luckily, I have a guy that thinks behaving that way is disrespectful to a spouse and a relationship, and wants no part of it.

Personally it wouldn't bother me, but everyone's boundaries are different and I respect those who have that boundary. I also know my husband doesn't really like them in general so maybe that skews my perspective because I know he's just sitting there bored and annoyed about over-paying for beer

Dancers make real money from lap dances and it's all within house rules. As this may include touching, I would not be about my spouse or me taking part. If we went together even, the dancers would touch me and assume he'd pay to watch. We'll just refrain. No disrespect to working women and men though.

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The thing that bothers me is that people that don't like their partner going are labelled as "insecure" and "not fun". That really needs to stop.

I've just seen things from the medical end, totally changed my view of it.

My family has owned a club for decades so I probably view them differently than other people do but I would have no issue with my FH going to a club. He has gone a few times but that was years ago. I know what goes on there and I don’t think that it’s fair to use the establishment as the excuse for inappropriate behavior but people do. If someone is going to cheat they can do that on a business trip (which I’ve seen multiple times) or any other normal activity.

I don’t care if he does. I feel the same way you do.

I would be through the roofs bothered. Call me old fashioned, but I hate strip clubs and they are basically "sex tents" filled with half-naked women. I also think it is especially wrong if a man in a relationship goes to a strip club. It's not technically cheating if the man was just watching the half-naked women dance on a pole or whatever, but once lap dances start happening, that is a form of infidelity to me at least. Thank god my fiancé isn't a strip club person.