Worst Momzilla Ever

She continually tells me I need to pay my bridesmaids if I ask them to do anything in regards to helping me with wedding planning.

Told me the dress I picked was a terrible choice because "Who wears silk in June?"

The venue she booked is insanely expensive, causing a lot of unneeded financial stress on FH and I.

Insists I throw a second reception after the ceremony for people from church who aren't invited to the actual ceremony.

Thinks $1500 for an EXCELLENT photographer is ridiculous.

Raised the budget enough to accommodate her "needs" for the wedding, but not enough to include anything FH and I would enjoy. (Like the cake we would like, or the bouquet I'm in love with.)

Continually tells everyone she comes in contact with the amount they're contributing to the wedding. (Seriously, it's not their business...)

Plans on donating EVERYTHING from the wedding to church so she can use it as a tax write off...

The list goes on you guys... But I'll stop there.

I suggest talking to her.

Ashley, I've tried. I've even gone into my pastor with her there and tried talking to her. Believe me, there has been plenty of talking.

I'll say this if you and FH can afford to pay for the Wedding in full on your own! Do it!!! This sounds insane almost, I was waiting for you to say "Just Kidding" at the end of your post... I understand why you're seeing two therapists... It's nice to have extra financial help I'm sure but that's when you have to listen to their opinions and kinda give in at times and give them what they want... Honestly if you can stop the madness now and pay for your Wedding on your own it'll probably be less stress

I'd refuse any more of her "help". Plan the wedding you want and can afford, and leave her out of it.

Elope!!! Actually, if talking hasn't worked I don't know what will. I'm joking about eloping.

Money comes with strings. You're finding that out now. If you don't want her involvement then decline the financial help and have the wedding you can afford. Then you can say no.

What PPs have said. If I were you, I wouldn't want her involved AT ALL anymore. That means no financial help. If it means you have to have a smaller wedding, or push the date out to give more time for you and FH to save, I would do it!

It seems like a lot of your issues stem from her financial involvement in the wedding.

The solution is to pay for it all yourself then.

If two qualified therapists are treating you for this one issue, I don't know what better advice we could possibly offer. But, I'll bite.

You need to cut the purse strings and the proverbial apron strings. You are not her problem child, you are her adult daughter -- an adult daughter who accepted her offer of money. That's when the mouse trap snapped. Hit the reset button on this relationship, and that doesn't always mean a big discussion must ensue; sometimes it means emotional distance. You have work to do. Don't engage the nonsense. You really do tell people how to treat you -- even your mother, and even if you're not really aware of it.

Lastly, if your parents booked your venue with a deposit, they signed a contract. That means THEY are the clients, not you. You do realize that, don't you? You just gave her a lot of power over what your wedding ultimately looks and feels like. I'd think long and hard about letting that stand. They may lose their deposit, but you could always pay it back in increments.

Good luck.

I echo what PPs have said. Tell her simply you're going to need to decline her financial contribution. Thanks, but no thanks. And walk away. Save yourself and plan a wedding you and your FH can afford. We're happy to help you plan a wedding that fits your budget from micro elopements in the park to small restaurant receptions and up to 3-year engagements to save the money for your dream. But you can't have any of that if you continue to let your mother have control, and so long as she's paying, she has a right to some of that control.

I have a few questions. 1. Why is MIL in charge of YOUR wedding budget? You are both adults right? And you claim you're contributing financially so shouldn't you be in charge of the budget? 2. Why is your MIL booking venues?? It's YOUR wedding you need to be the one booking. I'm surprised venues even take contracts with someone other than the bride or grooms signature. You need to derail that train but since it's FH mom he should really be the one talking to her. If you can no longer afford that wedding there are options. Cut down the guest list, get a 2nd or 3rd or 4th job, sell things you don't need etc.

Sounds like we could be sisters. This is exactly what would have happened had I let my parents contribute financially. Unfortunately a lot of the time money comes with strings attached. Either keep letting her but in or find a way to pay for it yourselves. Also I agree with her about silk in June but that's beside the point, she shouldn't put down the dress you love.

Elope. Have a frank conversation with Mummy Dearest and explain you're going to do what YOU want...thank you for her I'm put but you'll be no longer taking it. Send her back to her paster. Then stop answering your phone/texts/emails until you're married.

Again..Centerpiece for travel win! Go reread her advice!

1) Go Low Contact oe No Contact with your mother. Just because you're family doesn't mean she loves or respects you.

2) Cancel your venue or even the whole wedding. Do not accept any further assistance from your parents.

3) Start over by planning a wedding you can afford.

4) ???

5) Profit