Worst bridezilla moments?

My worst bridezilla moment has been kicking someone out of my wedding -- I stand by it, but it was a little bridezilla-esk for sure.

Since no one is technically going to be standing with us, I am having my bridesmaids wear different shades of pink, red, and burgundy in a formal gown (not bridesmaid dress) of their choice, but obviously I had the last say. This bridesmaid refused all of those colors and any style I recommended. Her and I had frequent issues for months prior, and she ended up telling me that my wedding wasn't worth her PTO - which was kind of her stepping down, IMO. There were lots of other details that contributed on both sides, but I not so politely let her know I didn't want her in my bridal party. I don't regret doing it, but wish I would have done it a little more gracefully.

Oh, absolutely! It's no excuse, but wedding planning right now can really get the best of you. It can be so stressful and bring out your worst. I've seen, and been apart of it, even on these forums to total strangers - let alone the people who I lean on, some. Sometimes we all can get mean and hateful. It's all about finding your line between being gracious and understanding, and standing firm on your wishes with your wedding. Engagement and wedding planning is all a huge experience that we'll all learn and grow from!

I don't have a lot of bridezilla moments because I've been pretty chill so far...we still have 8 months to go though! So I'll say my worst, but I stand by this completely still!...my best friend volunteered to design my save the dates and invitations at no charge so I'd have something unique and not just use a template. Well. I told her I wanted the save the dates done by early February because I still had to get them printed, addressed and mailed out. Come late January and she still hadn't done them. So I went behind her back, ordered some, and then told her not to worry about it because I couldn't wait anymore. She was really apologetic and I told her it was fine because life gets in the way, but I couldn't wait anymore! So I guess that's a little bridezilla.

In my defense, that same friend made us wear mini dresses to her late October wedding on a mountain without any nylons or a shawl allowed, so half of the girls were freezing and the other half of us walked down her aisle a little drunk because we took shots before to keep warm since it was a cooler day. So it evens out!

Mine had to be asking guests to avoid pink because that was what my bridesmaids were wearing and my bridesmaids were in all different dresses and shades of blush pink. honestly someone didn't do that and got mistaken as a bridesmaid. i know that's kind of bridezilla to do but at the same time, i just wanted my bridesmaids to stand out more as well. i did not say don't wear pink at all haha. i just wanted people to try to avoid solid color blush hues so they wouldn't get mixed up as a bridesmaid. I'VE BEEN MIXED UP AS ONE BEFORE AND IT WAS NOT FUN HAHA. i literally was standing near the greeting table at a wedding and people totally mistakened me for the bridesmaid before at a wedding. so i learned my lesson to avoid wearing the wedding colors

I have 2 bridezilla moments... but my mom and whole family got to hear it , instead of the person who I REALLY wanted to lay into.. i paid for a custom made dress, supposed to fit my body PERFECTLY and have pockets in the skirt.. i emailed this woman march/april 2020 she confirmed it ALL.. I get the dress Aug 2020 and the skirt is 5-6 inches too long, there are no pockets in the skirt, at all, and the bodice and skirt are too big overall. from the beginning this woman was going back and forth with me on measurements ... so i send the dress back to her, she agreed to correct to the issues.. i get the dress back Dec 23, 2020.. STILL 5-6 INCHES TOO LONG and the pockets were sewed into the other layer of the skirt instead of the inner layer!!! and now the cold shoulder sleeves are not correct either... WHAT IN THE WORLD???!!!! i tried to nicely word the email about my issues to this woman, and thankfully she offered a FULL refund of the dress if i sent it back to her, in the meantime i took it to a local seamstress who said she could fix the issues for $150, so decided to go that route instead. so instead of getting a full refund, i found someone to fix her idiotic mistakes.

2nd bridezilla moment - IT'S MY MUSIC AND I WANT IT PLAYED MY WAY. AND THE SLIDESHOW as well. I have playlists I created on itunes and want them played in a certain order, and i am making a powerpoint slideshow of pictures of us growing up/dating/ect. put to music on my 2003 powerpoint program. i want my laptop hooked up to their soundsystem /projector. The church sound guy just wanted me to give him the stuff on a USB port, which WON'T WORK CUZ THE MUSIC WILL GET OUT OF ORDER TRANSFERRING FROM ONE COMPUTER TO ANOTHER, AND THE OLDER POWERPOINT DOESN'T TRANSITION TO NEWER VERY WELL, AND I USED FONTS THAT ARE ON MY LAPTOP DOWNLOADED FROM INTERNET THAT ARE NOT BASIC FONTS ON EVERY COMPUTER!!!

I KNOW THIS because we tried this at my sister's wedding and it didn't work with their way, we had to bring my laptop and hook it up.. so yeh, I put SO much time and effort into this I want it my way!!! otherwise I will be wasting time night before or morning of the wedding re-ordering ALL of the songs. ugh...

I had been getting grief from everyone about everything. I was paying for the wedding myself, and yet for some reason, my in-laws felt they were entitled to some kind of control. They complained repeatedly about the venue being 40 minutes away (even though they regularly drove to the mall that was 50 minutes away in the same direction) and even gave my information to "in town" vendors trying to bully me into changing the location.

My mom, who is normally the most relaxed, loving, supportive, wonderful person, had a negative opinion on EVERYTHING. I never thought she would be like this, but I guess because none of her other daughters had weddings, she just got bit by some kind of bug. She complained about invitations without even seeing them simply because "wedding invitations should be white and pearl." She was aghast at my plain veil ("veils should have lace and beading!") She complained about my sketched cake design ("it's so simple! Wedding cakes should have lace and ruffles and flowers!!!") She threw a fit about the bridesmaids wearing black dresses ("Everyone is in BLACK?!?! It's going to look like a FUNERAL PROCESSION!") It was just a case of... my mom definitely would have been a Cinderella princess floofy cakes bride, and I have always, always been a minimalist. But she couldn't keep it to herself.

The combination of these things just finally made me snap. About two weeks before the wedding, I got a message from my future grandmother-in-law complaining again about how far away my venue was and how inconsiderate I was in picking it, and at the same exact moment my mom was hassling me about my cake topper not being a bride and groom. The cake topper, for some reason, was the final straw. I completely flipped and told everyone I was CANCELING THE ENTIRE [GOSH DARN] WEDDING and we were just going to elope in Hawaii. I then told our families they wouldn't even get pictures so they couldn't whine and b%$#h about our elopement, too.

My husband, for his part, just said, "sweetie, if that's what you want to do, let's do it. I'll help you call the vendors."

When everyone realized I was dead freaking serious about canceling the entire thing two weeks out and eloping - I even had a Maui destination elopement planner on call and already had a price quote - and my husband was 100% on board with it, they all promptly shut up.

I was very chill (to the point that my BP kept commenting on it), but I did have one bridezilla day.

It requires a bit of backstory, though.

DH is Catholic. I am not Christian. However, DH REALLY wanted to get married in the Catholic Church, so I agreed to talk to the priest and see what we had to do. Well, that meant precana. I was .... VERY skeptical of it, because it sounded like low-rent, super religious couples' counseling, and we'd already had REAL couples' counseling. THEN, my ILs got excited, and offered to pay for the weekend retreat version.

I balked.

Firstly, I usually work weekends, so that was a whole weekend I couldn't earn money. Secondly, weekend retreats and me don't mix well. At all. Never have. Add in, *not being Christian*, and I wasn't really comfortable with this.

But I let myself get talked into it.

This week was the 2nd anniversary of us going, and I'm *STILL TRAUMATIZED BY IT*. Like, was screaming on the train platform as we waited to go home kind of traumatized. (Our weekend was also incredibly poorly run. Like, the place they chose had rooms that either randomly only had hot water or cold water, but never both, kind of poorly run.)

We get back, and we go to talk to the priest again. I make it really clear that I was seriously traumatized by this weekend, and how the leaders ... kinda didn't care? And that was a problem, and I wanted to talk a LOT more with the priest about a Catholic marriage, because I wasn't currently feeling all that cool with it.

Priest.... never talks to us. Like, just flat out didn't want to give us times to come and figure this out.

So, come May, DH and I are thinking about ordering invitations, but *we still haven't had a chance to talk to the priest*. DH wants to put the Church stuff on the invites, but I hesitated, because we didn't have a green light or even a firm time.

Well.

We FINALLY get to talk to the priest, and... he says no.

Tries to say he's worried about DH's commitment to the church, not just me, but that's news to both of us, as he hadn't mentioned it before in any of our meetings.

3 1/2 months before our wedding, after dodging us for TWO MONTHS, he just yanks our ceremony out from underneath us. And refuses to talk about it at all.

I walk out of the church and I told DH that I was never setting foot in the church again. (I got an awful cold that Christmas, and the COVID happened, so... I haven't!)

Add in that I lost my checkbook AND got my period a week early, that SAME DAY, and I was IN A MOOD. (Bonus, DH called the church and asked if I had dropped my checkbook, and we didn't hear a PEEP from them for 2 days, when MIL said, "Oh, I saw the priest and he said he didn't have the checkbook." .... Um, that was critical information that could have been relayed immediately to us, not a third party.)

So, yeah, my bridezilla moment was the day everything went pear shaped at once.

This behavior was par for the course from my in-laws (who also caused drama at the wedding), but it was completely out of character for my mom. It was like someone flipped a switch. I think it may have been a "living vicariously" situation - my mom never had a wedding celebration, and none of my sisters did, either, so a lot of expectations were unknowingly being cast on mine.

The happy ending here is that when she finally saw it all together, she realized it was perfect for me and it was all beautiful, so all laments were forgotten.

I think I've been relatively chill so far in the planning process, as it's still early for us. However, I was called a Bridezilla by future mother in law a couple nights ago.

She stated she would LOVE to come dress shopping with me (Side Note: She has two other daughter in laws, did not ask to go with either of them and did not actually go with either of them) I apologized and let her know unfortunately that would be a no, I'm only bring 3 people with me, my mom, MOH and my best friend. She threw a fit that it's "so special" and she "wants to be a part of this" I apologized again, said I was sorry but this was something I was putting my foot down on, I have pretty severe body dysmorphia, and am also a REALLY big people pleaser so for my comfort I only want these three specific people, who were carefully chosen for three different specific reasons to come with me. I let her know I'd be happy to go with her to pick her dress, but I need very few people with me, to limit opinions, judgements and chatter when trying on a wedding dress for my mental health. She threw a FIT that I was being unreasonable, that she wouldn't give bad opinions, that she wants to be involved. I apologized again that it was nothing personal, it had nothing to do with her, it had to do with me and my mental health and body image issued. Then she told me I was being Bridezillaish.

Sorry I don't need her opinion on my dress, I don't need all these people talking at me in a vulnerable moment, and not for nothing, I'm not going to fit into a Sample Size, I've worn enough sample size wedding dresses in the past to know I'm no longer a sample size girl and I am going to end up being clamped in a dress where the back will probably be open and my butt hanging out, which she doesn't really need to be present for. \

I just couldn't believe that she wasn't listening to a WORD I was saying and had the nerve to call me a bridezilla when I was being respectful and giving legitimate reasons behind my decision. My mom owned a bridal store for the first 23 years of my life, I've seen what occurs when too many people are in the room, I think I know what I want and have a leg to stand on.