Worried about photographer

I would be concerned. I would ask him to provide you a list of shots he plans to do since your wedding is not like everyone else's wedding and that you also have photos you want to have added to his list. There should be no debate about this if he is a professional and does weddings. I would find it very hard to believe that in over 30 years, no bride has ever asked for anything special and was fine with everything being standard. If you are having a DOC, I would also make sure they have a list of your photos so that they can maybe ask from time to time if he has gotten this or that.

I am having a small wedding and we are only keeping our photographer for 4 hours. I think his thoughts may not be so far off depending on wedding style. Intimate weddings have less people so there isn't going to be as many action shots. Also, getting ready photos can be mocked up after you are actually ready. Unless you want it, there isn't a need for a photographer to be hanging around while you get your hair and makeup done. For example, you can pretend to touch up lipstick or zip up your gown. Details can be shot quickly, and even more so with an intimate wedding. Now, the reception is where I think it gets tricky. Are you having a big exit, first dances or a cake cutting that you want captured? We aren't doing any of that (besides the cake) so for us keeping a photographer isn't a necessity. For me, I sat down and decided what photos I would actually display in my home someday. Most likely the more intimate shots of us as newlyweds and the ones with close family and friends. If you think you want every shot possible, then he is going to need to extend whether he likes it or not. Honestly, your photographer doesn't sound super professional. While he may be making solid points based off experiences, if a bride wants more hours...then you give the bride more hours. Imo, it sounds like because he is a good photographer that perhaps he doesn't like being told what type of photos to take.

I feel like that’s good reason to be concerned. You’re paying for a service and want to get what you want from said service. I think you need to have a serious conversation with your photographer so that he clearly knows your expectations.

I think what he said wasn't that bad, it's the way he said it. I can see why he might not need to stay the whole time, but he definitely should have calmed your fears in a more reassuring way. Also, he probably has a specific style for his photographs. I assume you looked at his work before hiring him? The way he dismissed your ideas was very unprofessional. I'm sorry he's being crappy!!

View Quoted Comment What would you say? I don't even know how to talk to him.

View Quoted Comment With my photographer he offers a meeting a few weeks prior to the wedding to make sure he knows exactly what we want, so I would set up a meeting in person with your photographer to discuss what you want. Maybe go over the timeline of the wedding and the most important moments you want pictures taken of. Bring in any inspiration you have to show what you really want.

Have you asked to see some examples of his "complete wedding galleries," especially for smaller weddings like yours? Hopefully, you reviewed some before you booked him, but if not, I don't see any reason why you shouldn't ask to review some now! Fingers crossed, when you look at every photo he edited for a few couples with weddings like yours (that's what a gallery should include), you'll feel more confident that he knows what he's doing and will do an equally wonderful job with your wedding. If, after reviewing some full samples of his wedding coverage, you notice that there are specific types of photos he doesn't typically shoot that YOU WANT, I'd send him an email, with examples of photos attached, of some shots you would really like for him to get. Also, daughter's photographer asked for her to ask a wedding guest to be his "photo wrangler" who had a copy of the shot list she gave the photographer and would help ensure that when he was trying to get shots of "the bride's family" everyone who should be in that shot was there. Daughter asked my two sisters to be her "wranglers" and it really helped move things along. Good luck! Based on your posts, I know how much effort you've put in to planning your perfect day. Fingers-crossed you can relax about this knowing the photographer will do a great job!