Words of Advice for a Covid Bride?

I can’t imagine what you’re going thru and this may or may not work but every wedding has issues. All the BAM posts out there there’s none I’ve seen where things were 100% perfect. Logistically something is bound to happen but all those BAM posts will express that regardless even if things went wrong, it was still a beautiful day. So I guess what I’m saying is I hope knowing that even if it was pre pandemic, weddings are still prone to imperfection but that it’s still such a glorious day anyway

My FH and I struggled with this. We have kind of been grieving that our wedding will never be what we imagined or wanted. I don't know if I have any better advice than to grieve the loss of this like you would any other loss-- let yourself cry for a time, experience your emotions, then set about planning under the new circumstances.

For FH and I, we both dreamed of having lots of people at our wedding, and we have had to accept for a variety of reasons that our wedding will be smaller. We have cried about this, tried to think about ways around it, and eventually, we have accepted it. We have planned some vacation time to visit people we love who we won't be able to have at the wedding. We have also tried to focus on the parts of the wedding that are still exciting, like the dress and the decorations. In the end, we have just had to resolve to focus on the things about marriage that we are excited about, like shopping for a place together, using our wedding gifts to cook a meal together, taking our honeymoon, having friends over for dinner, having children, etc.

I hope you and your FS will be able to come to terms with the disappointment. There is no way around it, it just sucks. But there are many great things in the future to look forward to, especially a wonderful marriage!

Don't stress too much. My big wedding is March 2021 and I have a feeling that COVID will be a little more under control and we will be able to have our dream wedding . Obviously there will be some restrictions, BUT I don't think it will be anywhere near what it is now.

Do: Cry about it. It's a really unfair situation for every bride getting married this year, and its so overwhelming to realize that the day may not be the day you've always imagined.
Do embrace the fact that those that show up are showing up purely to support you. Covid is stripping out the social barriers: no need to invite great aunt Sue and her horrible live in boyfriend and spend hundreds on a plate just for her to spend the night gossiping about your flower choices and the colors.
Do try to relax. Your day may not be what you expected. Things will go wrong. But acknowledge that that is beyond you and your control. You can only control how you react.Do make preparations such as masks and hand sanitizer. Plan to cut your guest list again, plan to space everyone out, plan to make the catering Covid verified. Plan to work with the virus.Do remember to love your other half. I know it's been said a lot, but day of you'll be standing there knowing that even if all the plans fall apart, you'll have each other.Do know that marrying during this virus may look different from how you pictured, but its a beautiful moment of pure love. And even if you can't or don't feel good with going ahead in April, it'll still be ok.

Don'ton't internalize your grief. Acknowledge it and talk it out with your fiance. You're both dealing with a lot, and there is no certainty. We were all set to get married in April, completely paid off, then things collapsed. And now we had a minimony but have to have another ceremony anyway.Don't stress about the details. On the day, there was not time for me to worry about people wearing masks. The pictures I've seen, its just kind of part of the moment. And as someone who has gone through a ceremony, there will be so much going on that you won't even notice if someone wears the wrong tie.Don't forget to laugh. It's important to keep smiling and enjoying the day.

Unfortunately, none of us know how things are going to go this winter and what next year will look like, so I totally understand. It doesn’t do you any good to stress about things you can’t control, and it doesn’t do you any good to sports your feelings. Let yourself grieve the postponement and this whole uncertain terrible situation. Sure, there are people who have it much worse, but that doesn’t make your feelings any less valid. Take care of yourself, give yourself whatever time you need to step away from focusing on wedding stuff. I think it’s important to remain hopefully for next year, but when you’re ready to tackle it with a clearer head I think it’s also important to have a backup plan for your new date too. For me, part of the anxiety attached to the uncertainty is not having a plan if things don’t go the way I want them to.


First though, let yourself feel what you’re feeling, you don’t have to force yourself to focus on the positive right now. Also, lean on your partner, friends, and/or family for support.