Will your vendors be treated like guests? Or employees?

We are going to treat our vendors like guests whenever they are not “on the clock”. For example, we are inviting our officiant and her wife, and my makeup artist and her husband to stick around after their “jobs” are finished to have cocktails at cocktail hour, and also join us for dinner and drinks at the reception. Our photographers and videographers are also invited to sit down with us and enjoy dinner, and also enjoy the open bar (in moderation until they are finished shooting, then they are more than welcome to party it up with us once they’re done!)

My situation is kind of odd in that, two of my major vendors are also guests. My officiant is a friend, and the florist is my mom. The others that will be on site - the DJ/MC and photographers - we have scheduled to be there and working through the entire reception. I do plan on having vendor meals for them, however, as I certainly don't want them to be without a meal! But they are being paid through the last moment of the reception, so there really won't be time for them to join in the party.

It's a nice idea, if you can afford that in your budget and they aren't contracted to be working the whole time, though I've never heard of anyone doing that before.

We invited our officiant and her husband to our reception and they ate and drank along with the guests. Our photographers and DJ were given the same meal as guests, but weren’t supposed to utilize the open bar for alcohol- obviously they were free to grab any non-alcoholic drinks of choice they wanted. They also provided services for our entire event so they were working until the end of our reception so it wouldn’t have been very professional for them to be drinking.

We invited the officiant and his wife, who declined attending the reception. Our MUA was invited to partake in the food we had out while she was there (though she left before the ceremony). The photographer and coordinator were both given seats at guest tables and ate what everyone else did. I appreciated the time and effort each and every one of my vendors put into my wedding, and treated them accordingly.

Our vendors were treated as vendors. They revived the same food as the guests but they sat in the back where they could relax at their own table out of view of the guests. Bar was not addressed, but they should not have been drinking as they were being paid to work. The exception being the officiant as they were invited to the reception as a guest with his wife.

We were very relaxed and friendly with ours, but definitely no drinking on the job! We did have flip flops for guests as it was a beach ceremony/backyard wedding and I didn’t want anyone to be miserable bc of the wrong footwear, so we way overbought. I offered them to everyone to take home— a couple of the servers were excited to take some pairs home to their kids! We had a great friendly relationship with all our vendors, but we certainly didn’t cross any lines that would interfere with them doing their professional jobs they were hired to do. Like, I think they had a good time…but they definitely weren’t guests. They ate delicious food and I know were able to chat with some guests , but they weren’t ripping shots or on the dance floor 🤣

I also have a vendor who is a guest - but she's the florist and her job will be done by the time the reception rolls around. The others - I guess it's really only the band and the photographers?

I don't think you should (in Australian) carry on like a pork chop and be a painful, demanding bridezilla, but I also don't think you should treat them like guests, because they are not guests. We are paying for their service, and there are contractual obligations on both sides.

From our side, we are required contractually to feed them, and it is my personal opinion that you should be gracious and a good host - they'd be welcome to have a beer etc as long as they don't have so many that it begins to impact their ability to do good work. I don't actually know where the venue puts them to eat. I should ask. It isn't on a table with guests though.

In addition to what is clearly set out in the contract, I firmly believe they deserve regular breaks, and I would hope I'd make sure they had time to use the facilities, get a drink of water etc as needed, and that I'd remember to ask those questions to ensure they feel like they're free to take what they need. I also would be happy for them to take any leftover favours if they wanted one, but I haven't bought one for them - our favours are cookies that double as place names on the tables, so ordering them extras might be weird when they don't have a spot on the tables.

I'm glad you raised this because it is something I will think about the logistics of a little more, now. It's a long day for our vendors, so the least we can do is ensure they're comfortable!

I struggle with this one. I don't pay or tip my guests...

We are inviting our Chaplin and his wife to our reception for a plated dinner (not sure if they’ll come), but otherwise the only other vendor (outside the venue’s event coordinator and catering staff) is our photographer. He’ll likely be sitting for dinner at a table near us (and/or he can go to one of our lounge areas that will be set-up in the cocktail hour spaces for breaks), as our venue serves the same plated options to vendors as our guests.

We made sure to have an extra table set up specifically just for all vendors and workers as well as offered their choice of meal from the options we were providing. We even made sure to inform them that they were able to enjoy any non-alcoholic drinks, the coffee bar, cake and cookies.

We treated our vendors like guests, but only two or three of them actually partook in the food, cake, or bar. We made sure beforehand to have the correct dinner choice for all of the vendors!

My officiant is a long time friend, cake is being done by FH stepsister, photographer is FH Uncle and the caterer is the best man. So obviously they are family. The DJ and his wife are more than welcome to eat and help themselves to whatever they want.

My wedding is super chill with a taco truck and desserts and no seating chart. My vendors will be 100% welcome to eat and party if they want

Guests! My fiancé and I have always felt that way. We’ll be treating them to breakfast/ lunch before hand and then they all get to eat with us and hang out and grab a drink or whatever!

View Quoted Comment I hadn’t really heard of it before, either. We are having a destination wedding, so it is going to be more of a small, intimate affair; but definitely a four-day party! We are very laid back people and always embrace newcomers, so it only made sense to us to include our vendors in as much of the party vibe as possible! I think the more immersed in the experience the photographers and videographers are, the more fun and accurate the resulting photos/video will be!

View Quoted Comment I think the only professionals that will be working the entire evening for us are the photographer and videographer. I am telling them they are free to enjoy a cocktail here and there (if they want to, that is), after dinner. I figure by then they will have all of the important photos done, and it will only be “party” pics/footage at that point. And the more immersed they are in the party vibe, the more fun/accurate the photos and video are going to be. I am just going to trust that they are professional adults and won’t get sloshed during the event (or at least not until after they have gotten all the pictures/footage they need LOL)

View Quoted Comment I love that you were courteous to your vendors. You hear so many horror stories about brides/couples who treat their vendors like crap. I think it’s absolutely horrible! Just because you’re paying for a service, doesn’t mean you don’t treat people kindly and respectfully.

View Quoted Comment I do think a lot of couples treat their vendors as vendors, as you did. I can completely understand that a lot of people have a very specific way they see their wedding going, and want their vendors to remain on a very professional level. We are having a very chill “party” vibe at our wedding, and it was really important to FH and I that every single person in attendance (including vendors) have a great time. I know we are paying them to do a job, but I love the idea of them also having fun! Plus, I think for us, it would feel strange partying it up while people walked around all professional and stuffy taking our pictures. Just thinking about it makes me feel awkward LOL

View Quoted Comment We are actually hoping they are ripping shots and on the dance floor! 😂😂 We figure by the time dinner is over, all the important photos are done anyway, then it’s just “party” pics/videos. Luckily, our photographer and videographer will be the only ones still “on the clock” at that point; and FH and I seem to be in the minority and that photos aren’t that important to us. We prefer to have a great experience/memories over great photos. Hopefully we end up with both though! Lol

View Quoted Comment Photos weren’t that important to us either, our photographers were long gone by the end of the night. We didn’t even have them at the reception 🤣. Worked out perfectly for us!


Our vendors who were left towards the end of the night were the DJ and the caterer’s clean up crew, so they all still had things to do/ expensive equipment to pack up, and themselves to drive home. Ours was a backyard wedding in a rural location, so I had worry of liability with everyone getting home — for our guests we had a shuttle service so didn’t need to worry about drinking and driving; if our vendors were drinking it would’ve been a huge worry for me about them getting off the property.