Will I Regret Not Having a Shower

Yes.

I don't want one, and am not having one. My mom tried to convince me too, but when the "coed BBQ/shower" fell through I knew it I would rather not do one at all. You do what's right for you.

You do not have to have a shower if it will be awkward for you! You could even do a small luncheon so the moms can meet if you like, maybe invite your bridesmaids or whatever, but don't feel obligated to have a big occasion where people watch you open presents.

I think this is totally up to you. You could always have another type of party. For me a tea party would be cool. This is such a personal thing. If you're your moms only child then I do think she would feel like she's missing out.

I had a surprise shower so I didn't really get a choice, but I loved it. It was fun.

I didn't have one, I did not want one and I regret nothing.

I'm not an only child, but I am the only daughter (I have one brother). My FH is also an only child. Part of me is concerned about whether this is something that the moms would really want and if that was the case I think I would do it for them. I'm just super socially awkward and weird about things. I think my avatar sums that up pretty well.

If you don't want one, no! Maybe, if you want the in laws to meet each other and get to know the wedding party, just do a simple brunch or something similar.

I have no desire for any sort of engagement/bridal/wedding/bachelorette anything. But that has always been my preference. No regrets at all.

I didn't have one. Work was really crazy leading up to the wedding and I felt like another event would stress me out. I don't regret it. The wedding was enough IMO.

Yes!!!im sure your mom would be so happy to throw u one ( if she's not already doing one anyways lol)

Edit: if you really don't want one I guess not. But if u are already second guessing??

Remember, just because the wedding industry or brides-to-be say you have to do whatever, you don't have to do whatever. If you're socially awkward, don't like the idea of having people believing they have to come to a pre-wedding party and bring you a gift, and you really don't want or need those gifts, then be who you are -- just say no (the truth is, a majority of contemporary brides don't need the household items that brides decades ago truly needed to set up their homes. Society has changed, and many women are either living with their intended spouses, or living alone. They've done the shopping, and they've selected what they need and want. Many of them already have toasters, pots/pans, dinnerware, glassware, flatware, sheets, shower curtains, area rugs, wall art, blenders, mixers, dish towels, bath towels, and roasting pans).

What might be fun is a recipe shower. It doesn't cost anyone a cent, and at the end of it, the bride has embraced a once-in-a-lifetime event spent socializing with wonderful people while enjoying some wine or champagne, an open forum to talk about her wedding to her heart's content, and at the end of the day, she'll have a stack of great recipes that she might end up loving so much, she'll still be cooking them 30 years from now -- when her own children are getting married.

I'm all for pre-wedding celebrations. In this world of challenges, losses, and disappointments, nothing brightens our world like celebrations -- and wedding celebrations are among the most happy, beautiful, and hopeful. Actually, I'd love to get an shower invitation that made it clear that the bride wasn't interested in a gift, but rather, she just wanted an afternoon or evening to enjoy cocktails and apps while collecting the beginning of her own personal cookbook. I'd give a lot of thought to the subject, and the bride would probably be the recipient of one of my most universally beloved chicken casserole recipes.

If you're okay with that, I think you're guests will love it.

I did not have one and I do not regret it one bit. I didn't have a registry either.

It's totally up to you but my aunt is throwing me one and I'm excited for it. It'll be a great excuse to just be around the women who you love the most and they love you. Let them shower you with gifts!

I've felt the same way but my mom said...let your family and friends do something for you, they WANT to do something for you. That made me look at things differently. For some reason I saw showers as a gift grab and another opportunity for a bride to play pretty perry princess, center of attention.

The only problem I'm having now is getting the ladies organizing to understand that it will be small because I only want people invited to the wedding at the shower. Since all the female members of my family live out of state, and I only have four friends here invited to the wedding, it shouldn't be a big party. I was hoping for a little brunch. However, I think they want something big and will try to invite extra random people just to have a bigger party. They keep saying it isn't a big deal to invite folks not invited to the wedding :-/ Sigh...

I'm not having one either. My mom wanted to throw it the same week as the wedding because we live in different states and I only plan on coming back for the wedding. I quickly said NO WAY to that idea.

If you don't like to think people are "coming to an event for you because they're obligated", then why are you having a wedding?

I think you need to stop feeling bad that people WANT to do something for you and just let them throw you a party for heaven's sake!!!

And, if someone REALLY didn't want to come to your shower/wedding, they would NOT go. Try to think more positively and think that the people that show up, CHOSE to be there, they CHOSE to free up their Saturday or Sunday for YOU because they want to celebrate YOU.

I agree, you should do what your heart tells you to do. My FSIL just had a baby shower recently and enjoyed every second of it. She kept telling us the she regretted not having a bridal shower for her marriage. She even mentioned that keeping it small and more about socializing/eating/drinking would have been the best way to go for her if she could do it all over again! Good luck! I hope you do whatever makes you feel happy!

You don't need to have one, but I'll tell you what I truly enjoyed planning a bridal shower for my best friend and am already looking forward to planning another, for another friend. When people love you, they take joy in it.

My best friend already lived with her fiancé and they really didn't need house stuff so we spread the word that anyone who brought a gift could bring wedding related stuff (I got her the flutes, someone else the cutting set, lingerie, ring holder, etc.)

I've also heard of people doing rooms specific bridal showers. Like if your kitchen needs upgrade then asking for kitchen related items specifically.

We also did hers at a restaurant, it was easy set up, a few table decorations, inviting people and we didn't have to pick up, we had a great time!

Two of my bridesmaids would have to fly to be at my shower. And my FH's mom lives in another country. I wouldn't ask or expect them to come and it would feel weird to have one and them not be there. So that's my main reason for not having one. If there are people who want to throw you one, and everyone you want to be there is able and you're on the fence about it, I say go for it. The chances of you regretting that you did are slim yet the chances of you regretting that you didn't is higher. Good luck deciding!

Yes