Why can’t venues feature same sex couples?

Then you don't get married there. Representation was very important to us for vendors like photographers and videographers, but if we would have waited around to find a venue in our area that posted same sex couples on their social media, we still wouldn't have a wedding date. It's unfortunate and I'm not saying it's right, but it's the way it is. Businesses don't want to risk their reputation by posting something so controversial that could potentially cost them future clients. If they simply refuse same sex couples, are those the kind of people you want to give your money to anyway?

I'm not saying this is the case with some venues, but maybe the couples don't agree to have their weddings featured? My photographer didnt share any of our photos on their socials because we didnt want them to.

View Quoted Comment That makes sense and I understand the couples not wanting to be featured! I guess what I’m saying is that I wish it was made known that the venue allows same sex couples in their about us or info page!

I’m not part of a same sex couple but our venue did have that info on their homepage/FAQ. I was very happy to see it included.

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I'm not sure, but I was under the impression that any vendor who advertises on WW welcomes all clients. I think I saw a little blurb about the policy somewhere. Good luck!

I found the policy. It's available by clicking on the link on the right side of this page that says, "Wedding Wire celebrates love, and so does everyone on this site." In part, the policy reads:

"WeddingWire does not tolerate discrimination of any kind. On WeddingWire, you never have to worry about anyone refusing to provide or accept services, or encountering any other type of discrimination, because of who you are. If you experience discrimination with any user or vendor, please email support@weddingwire.com, with the subject "Nondiscrimination Policy," so we can immediately investigate and take appropriate measures, including removing vendors and users who violate our policy."
Good luck!

That's frustrating not being represented for your venue's marketing materials. Of course you want to know you will be welcomed and included! While it isn't the same, are you working with a photographer or caterer than can direct you to these venues? These vendors have worked a ton of weddings and usually can make recommendations. And then when you find a venue, encourage them to represent LGBT weddings on their site if they already are not.

View Quoted Comment That’s very good to know I had no idea thank you !!

There seem to be a lot featured in Chicago.

I think it really depends on the area. Many vendors here are pretty upfront, but some we still had to ask. In fact our biggest concern was the cake and we had no issues, they smiled and said they work with anyone. Our biggest problem was finding an officiant willing to marry us and represent my wife's faith, but luckily I have known someone for a few years that is not only an officiant but also "family" so he was happy to help. It meant a lot to us. Representation is extremely important, but smaller businesses also feel they have to walk a line in certain areas. Do you have a local LGBTQ organization that may have a list of friendly businesses? That may help your search.

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Unfortunately that is not true in all cased. Lighthouse Wedding Officiant in Hampton Roads, VA refused to marry us because we are a same sex couple. Many others just would not respond. I don't know if there is a clause here for officiants but some only claim to be friendly.

Almost every venue I looked at mentioned same sex friendly. Maybe it's the type of venue?!

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I'm so sorry. Did you report any of the vendors who were more blantant in their refusals to work with you to WeddingWire so they had the chance to follow-up or intervene? I can understand if you didn't, sometimes the path of least resistance is a better choice for our own peace. I'm just wondering how effective WW's "investigations" are, if/when issues are brought to their attention. The ghosting/non-response issue is so much harder to pin down...unfortunately. Based on posts, lots of vendors ignore tons of inquirers, so it's difficult to indentify when they are being discriminatory and when they just have terrible customer service. I'm glad dispite the unfairness you encountered along the way, you had such a beautiful and perfect wedding!

So I am playing devil's advocate...just because they have photos of heterosexual couples doesn't mean they are solely advertising only working with heterosexual couples. Many venues may have not had a same sex couple yet or perhaps the couple doesnt want to show off their intimate day (definitely us lol). Also, when going to a policy or FAQ'S page, I have never seen a site that states they only work with heterosexual couples. Perhaps instead of labeling their prefered clientele as heterosexual or same-sex, they just advertise a great location for a wedding for all people without the label?! Do you have to see a same-sex couple featured or a note that labels their guests by gender preference in order to feel comfortable? I am not trying to be rude, but I hate companies that label people and I find it pretty derogatory to basically say "hey we welcome you because you don't fit the societal norm." I am more under the impression that a good business accepts all people and therefore doesn't need to prove that they are an establishment that simply accepts everyone. All I am saying, there is a pretty solid chance you may miss out on some great venues if you are just looking at some wording that is missing or some photos that may not be on the front page of a site.

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That particular vendor was the only one that was blatant in their unwillingness to work with same-sex couples and since they are considered clergy I simply assumed they were "protected". Of course it bothers me that they choose to interpret their faith in a way that is hateful and harmful, I can't tell anyone how to worship just like I don't want anyone to tell me how to. I did leave a review on Google or Yelp and his only response was "I should have provided names of other officiants" so I left it at that.

One reason we loved our venue, and chose to go tour it to begin with, was because they advertised same sex weddings as well as heterosexual weddings. While researching venues we did come across one that stated on their website that they would not perform same sex weddings at their venue. Being a same sex couple, that one was obviously crossed off the list. But even if we were a heterosexual couple, I would never marry there. I would refuse to give my money to a business advertising blatant hate.

During our vendor search, we had no issues with any vendors (that we actually met with) being unacceptable or rude to us because we were a same sex couple, and many that we met with did not advertise that they accepted same sex couples.

Must depend on where you live. I see a lot of venues and photographers display it to the forefront to let everyone know they support all diverse groups! Maybe it be one of the very first questions to ask before having a tour and falling in love with it. I'm sure if they didn't support it, you'd fall out of love quickly though.