Why can people just mind there business

When it comes to weddings, loads of people suddenly become super opinionated about everything in your wedding and your relationship aha. It’s like suddenly everyone has an opinion about what you’re doing. It’s annoying for sure, just gotta shake it off and focus on you and the positive people around you.

View Quoted Comment Thank you Melle it’s like everyone wants to put there two cents in I’m the type of person I really just want to change my number after I get married and just start a new life.

Girl I feel ya. Deleted our social media and have even cut out friends and some family because of the negativity. People are opinionated about anything and its ashame.

Social media can be destructive a lot of the time, encouraging everyone to put their private lives on display, in detail, to more people than they would confide in normally. With no restrictions on how they pass it on. And between that and reality TV, people have no idea of privacy anymore. No boundaries. No sense that everyone else does not want their opinions on every detail of everything. For weddings, you really have to preempt trouble. Going off Facebook and others helps. Practice replying to unwanted suggestions with innocuous ways of saying, Shut up and MYOB. My MIL is wonderful. But 6 of hubby's 7 sisters and 5 of his seven brother's wives could incorporate as advice central. I started saying, since FI and I are planning things for the first time together, we have decided not to take any suggestions. Nope, sorry, not listening. We want to surprise everyone. My MIL was and is a godsend. Any time we were with family as a group, it was always at his parents ( most grown and married kids live nearby.) And she was like having a big dog. One of them would start up with opinions and she would speak up, or even get people's attention and stand up. Excuse me, but whose wedding is this? T and J's, that is right. So these are their decisions to make. If they want opinions, they will ask. You planned your wedding, now is time for you to be quiet..... She had several variations on the same thing. I wish I could have taken her to work with me. Enough of politely tiptoing around. I DON'T WANT TO HEAR ANY SUGGESTIONS FROM YOU!!! Where do people you would never invite to your home, get off advising you on lingerie for your wedding night, your diet, or anything else?

View Quoted Comment Thank y’all so much everyone it’s more my mom treating my like a child still and her being unhappy in her life because her husband was African and he dogged her out (now there getting a divorce) but she had a part in her marriage going down as well my FH is African and she just stick that one country men’s in a box and at this point I don’t want a relationship with her anymore because I’m tried of the negative and her trying to live her life through me.

View Quoted Comment This isn't just messing with your wedding, but with your relationship itself ! No, cut her off or cut her out. It usually takes 2 people, their misjudgements to start with, and their behavior while married, to make a marriage go bad. It is not right for her to say everything bad came from her ex, and worse for her to assume you and your fiance are as bad. As you say, she had her part she played, too. You are you, not another her. I hope you have chosen a nicer guy, and that together you make a great marriage. We are from very different backgrounds, different races, different religion, our parents from very different cultures, different languages. But we work as a couple, because of the people we are. We are mostly in agreement, or are within working it out distance, on how we live our daily lives, how we treat each other, how we feel about jobs and sex and money and children. We are more than 12 years into a happy marriage that will last. We shut out all those who said, you will never make it. Their thoughts, their problems. Make things work for you, for each other. And don't tolerate being told differently. Your marriage. You two can make it happen. Mom failed, that is her problem. Don't you carry her burdens. Don't let her dump them on you. Loving your mother does not mean letting her dump on you. Separate from her. If she comes around, she can be a guest. If not, in a few years things will be different, maybe you can be family again. But now, don't let her prejudging FI hurt you. I wish you the best, making a happy, lasting marriage with your man.

Honey, I'm in my thirties and my family still treats me like a baby. My fiance and I got engaged after 3 months and oh boy! I litterally felt I had to explain to all family members, coworkers and friends exactly why I wanted to get married. I realized my my fiance' wasn't having this problem; simply put, he doesn't care about what people think. I finally stopped caring too and have asserted myself as an adult who'se done well in life and I don't need to consult anyone about getting married. This is both our 2nd marriage.

People are sooo opinionated! We got engaged at 21 and 22; we'll be married at 23 and 24. Everyone only wants to say "you're so young, how do you know it's right" or "you're so young, there's no rush" etc etc. But that doesn't even bother me the most - what gets me is the "well you're different, you don't understand" because I found my partner early and haven't been in the "dating scene" in my 20s. Like, no, our relationship and experiences are just as real, even though you think we're weird and silly for getting married so young. I hear you, I empathize with you, you aren't alone!!

It really depends on the couple. Getting married in your early 20s used to never even cause someone to blink an eye. Twenty years from now, they'll say 30 is too young. Just trust in your own relationship, and leave everyone else with negativety in the dust. They don't know you or your relationship.

Honestly it doesn't matter what age you are or how long you and your fiance have been together, there is always going to be people who put their 2 cents in where it's not needed. I'm almost 30 and been with my fiance for 3 years and I have people getting into my business. I've had a lot of people getting into my business about getting married. I got people getting in my business about when we are going to have kids. Honestly you just got to tell them off or ignore it because it will never end. No matter what path you choose you will have people judging you and in your business.

View Quoted Comment Thank you Elizabeth I appreciate it.

View Quoted Comment I appreciate it Katie.

Hey, lady! I feel the exact same way. This is my 2nd marriage and my fiance got engaged within 4 months of knowing one another. We're buying a house together as we speak and are planning to have children. We have a date set for October but both decided we wanted to get married this month. Boy - family are not happy! My mom, especially. Everyone has an opion and my mom say it wasn't in her "vision" to see me move so quickly. Well, I thought about it and asked myself, "what am I waiting for"? I'm in my 30's, I've done what my parents have asked me to do by graduating from college, moving out on my own and contributing to society. I'm very involved socially so why should I take another 2 years to determine if this is a great guy to start a family with? We're in love and happy and that's all that matters. Family will get over it.

Your family will get over it sooner than later and when they see the beautiful family you two have created, they'll only be able to smile. Good luck - always!