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Just Said Yes August 2020

Who should give the toast?

Sadie, on May 29, 2019 at 7:53 PM Posted in Wedding Reception 0 7

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Hi everyone! My name is Sadie and this is my first post, woohoo! Anyhow, my fiance and are are having a more non traditional wedding. For my bridal party, I'm having my 3 younger sisters, my aunt, and my best friend. For my fiance's "groomsmen", he is having his two younger sisters. He didn't want anyone else because he is so close to his sisters. We were talking about giving speeches and stuff and he wants one of his good friends (he only hangs out with him once every few months) to do the toast. Is that weird or totally normal? I saw it as weird but I feel like it's just because people don't normally do it like that...I don't know. Just let me know if that seems weird.

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7 Comments

Latest activity by Jolie, on May 30, 2019 at 12:02 PM

Master September 2019
Sarah · on May 29, 2019 at 8:00 PM
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I feel like this is weird. Personally I see the toast as an even more personal gesture than being in someone’s wedding party. If he isn’t close enough to this person to include them in the wedding party as a groomsman, I think it’s strange he considers them close enough to ask him to do a toast.
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Master July 2019
Hannah · on May 29, 2019 at 8:08 PM
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I would have to agree with Sarah. The toasts are usually done by the best man/woman and maid/matron/man of honor because those are the 2 closest people to the bride and groom. If your fiance doesn't think this friend is close enough to be a groomsman, why does he want him to do the toast? At the end of the day, you guys can do whatever you guys want, as it's your wedding. As a guest, I would be confused as to why this guy is up there speaking though.
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VIP April 2019
Nikita · on May 29, 2019 at 10:17 PM
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Sure it's non-traditional. As a guest I might go, "oh, I didn't expect that." But I don't see anything wrong with it. In fact, I might find it sweet/endearing that the sisters were in the wedding party and a good friend doing the toast. I'm all for having traditional elements done in a non-traditional way. I think that's where you see the true personality of the couple and makes the most memorable moments.
If you want, you can even have multiple toasts, so that the wedding party speaks first and the friend second. That might help make some more traditional guests less confused.
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VIP September 2019
CDickman · on May 29, 2019 at 10:38 PM
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Maybe he can do a reading. A toast is when the bride and groom thank everyone for coming.
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VIP September 2019
CDickman · on May 29, 2019 at 10:40 PM
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I always thought of the toast if when bride and groom thank everyone for calming then the grooms lady and BM will do a small speech.
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Super November 2019
Kristin · on May 30, 2019 at 9:16 AM
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We are only having the dad's give a toast at the reception. MOH and Best Man will also say a few words but will keep it real short. We don't want to break up the night by having a million people drone on and on at the reception. MOH and Best Man are going to give longer toasts (if they want) at the Rehearsal dinner and then we are going to open it up to anyone to say a few words that wants to. We are inviting all OOT guests to the rehearsal so about 50 of 200 people. It's more intimate and casual and we feel its a more appropriate time to do longer speeches. We also don't want anyone to feel snubbed who might have wanted to say something so this plan just seems to work best for us.
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Master October 2019
Jolie · on May 30, 2019 at 12:02 PM
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The toast is usually done by the father of the bride. So yes, I think it is weird a friend would do it. I think the friend can give a nice speech instead! But even so, usually it's bridal party that gives speeches..
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