Who pays what?

I wouldn't ask them if they haven't offered. "Traditionally", yes the brides family pays for the wedding. But that's often not the case anymore as times have changed. I immediately assumed we would be paying for our wedding entirely on our own until my parents told me that they wanted to contribute. I never would've asked if they hadn't offered, I would've felt really rude doing that. Then again, you know your relationship with your parents better than we do and everyone's situation is different.

You're responsible for the cost of your own wedding. If someone offers help, that's great, but you definitely shouldn't be asking for it.

View Quoted Comment

Right! That's how I feel, but my issue is everyone is telling me I should ask and I feel as though that is out of line.

View Quoted Comment

Trust your gut, don't let everyone tell you what you should be doing. If they offer, then that's great. If not, then no harm done.

I wouldn't ask, unless maybe your parents have mentioned in the past they would like to help and you just need to clarify now. We are paying for our own wedding entirely. So far noone on either side has offered to help. If they do, great, and we will probably just ask them to cover one specific thing (such as the DJ, or the cake) instead of a cash amount, but we do not plan to ask anyone.

Plan to pay for your own wedding unless you are told otherwise. Asking for money or if they are going to contribute is rude in my opinion. People who plan on contributing to your wedding will let you know that they will be doing so.

I have been on my own long enough to know that I will be splitting the wedding with my FH. I don't want the responsibility on my parents or his just because of tradition. If no one has offered I don't think you should assume they will help paying.

Okay so, just a heads up this is just something I've been being told. This is not something I want to do. Just throwing that out there.

I wouldn’t ask and just bank on you and your SO other are paying. I’m sure there might be some things they will offer and pay for once you start the planning process

As person above said, you know your relationship with your parents best. So do what feels right in your heart! Personally FH & I planned to pay for our wedding 100% on our own. Though we got very blessed that FH’s mom is contributing!

Even if it's your parents - I wouldn't ask. If anyone offers you money or offers to pay for specific things as your planning then you are totally free to accept if you want. Definitely rude and awkward to ask anyone for money though.