Who pays for what!?

Traditionally (and I cannot stress this enough), the groom's family has been known to pay for things like the rehearsal dinner, alcohol, florals, and the honeymoon. As you said, times have changed so none of this is required. Unless someone offers to pay for things, the bride and groom should expect to foot the entire bill for the wedding.

Agree that until/unless someone offers a specific amount of money they want to contribute, there are no longer any "traditionals." Plan the wedding you can afford with funds available. If people offer to help, it will be a happy surprise! (That being said, we paid for 80% of daughter & SIL's wedding and his dad offered to pay for a photographer of their choosing and an additional cash contribution that combined ended up totaling the other 20%.) Also, if someone offers, tactfully, try to get a firm commitment on the specific dollar amount and when they will be comfortable giving you/a vendor the money. There are SO many posts on this forum from B&G's who were told, "we'll pay for the rehearsal dinner (or something else)" only to find out those making the offer were thinking of something VERY different than what the B&G thought they were committing to or when the time came the offerer could no longer afford the contribution they promised.... Also, if any one offers a financial contribution, make sure you know up front what their expectations are with regard to how much say they will have on how the money is spent. If you don't want to have to listen to others' requests, don't take money from them unless you are positive there are no strings attached (or you can live with the strings...).

From what I've been told, traditionally the groom's family pays for the rehearsal dinner & honeymoon. The bride's family covers everything else. I think a lot of people laugh at "tradition" because it's just not as common anymore to assume one side can pay for a 20k+ wedding by themselves. In our case, that was fine for my father. My father (with a little help from my mom & stepfather) paid for our entire wedding and four nights at hotels for our honeymoon. My husband's father and stepmother paid for our rehearsal dinner, and my husband's mother didn't pay for anything because she wasn't able to financially. We paid for the remaining part of our honeymoon. We also didn't ask anyone to pay for anything, everyone offered then we went from there.

The couple is financially responsible for the wedding and any other pre-wedding events that they decide to host unless someone else offers.

Like you said, my husbands family paid for the rehearsal dinner and the bar for the wedding. They generously also paid for our honeymoon! My dad's girlfriend gifted us by paying for hair and makeup for the morning of (1 bride + 5 bridesmaids + 3 moms) as well as small favors for each guest. My (divorced) parents split the remaining costs evenly.

Some items that my husband and I paid for included: any outfits we wore for various events (showers, bachelorette/bachelor party, rehearsal, bridal brunch), gifts for our parents/bridesmaids/groomsmen, and all of the odds and ends that we finished last minute (table numbers, printed seating chart, thank you notes, etc.)

This time ten. You are both adults, assuming you both work, you can foot the bill for the optional wedding celebration that you are choosing to have. If parents or others offer, fine, otherwise be prepared for the bills. My hubby was a first time groom at age 52 and my MIL/FIL never offered us a dime, nor should they have. (My parents had passed.)

I like your answer MOB ! My Future in laws offered the rehearsal dinner, and a lump sum amount towards whatever we needed. It's turning out to cover most of dinner. My father and step mom offered to pay for our photographer. My mom bought my dress, and is helping out here and there with other things. There's not much that's "traditional" any more!