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Just Said Yes October 2013

who decides what the groom ewars?

susie, on June 29, 2013 at 11:23 PM Posted in Wedding Attire 0 22

My father wants my FH and all GM, including the 2 fathers, to wear a tux but FH wants to wear a black suit. I dont want to disappoint my father and also want my FH to be happy. I am caught in the middle. who should decide what the groom wears?

22 Comments

Latest activity by Ab, on June 30, 2013 at 1:05 PM
  • Allyson
    Master May 2014
    Allyson ·
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    I think the groom should decide. It's his day too.

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  • Sarah
    Super September 2014
    Sarah ·
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    I agree with Allyson

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  • Stacy
    Expert August 2013
    Stacy ·
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    If it's an evening wedding then the groom should wear a tux with everyone else. I chose what my groom is wearing. He wanted to wear a white tux with a fedora and I wasn't having that!

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  • T & Co
    Super March 2014
    T & Co ·
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    Do they all know the difference? I know the difference but it is really not much of one, I would urge your FH to wear a tux since it is more luxurious and it is one day to not look like he is simple going to a business meeting or Christmas party. It does not look right if the fathers wore a tux and the FH wears a suit.

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  • We'llAlwaysHaveParis
    Master November 2013
    We'llAlwaysHaveParis ·
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    In our relationship, it's the groom. FH is not having it when I try to tell him what I think he should wear LOL

    I really do think its up to them. It's their wedding too.

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  • Mrs.Turner
    Devoted September 2013
    Mrs.Turner ·
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    It's up to them unless they don't care, my wedding is rustic and casual so groom is wearing dark wash jeans, a white button up, natural color linen vest, tiffany blue tie and cowboy boots. Groomsmen in dark wash jeans white button up, suspenders, tie and cowboy boots. I want my guy to be comfortable cause he is just not a suit guy (:

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  • S
    Just Said Yes October 2013
    susie ·
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    Thank you for your comments. I'd like to clear one thing up. If my FH wears a suit , all will wear one, except my father.

    I dont care either way, just want to know WHO should decide what the groom wears? My dad or my groom?

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  • Mrs. Katie J
    Super October 2013
    Mrs. Katie J ·
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    The groom - It really shouldn't be a question...

    My fiance and I chose a few tuxedo combinations to try on at the tux shop and we both agreed on the one combination he liked best.

    You're about to be married and have a husband, your father should respect that and there shouldn't even be a question about who chooses what for your groom.

    Would you let his mother choose YOUR wedding dress???

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  • ice fire
    Expert February 2017
    ice fire ·
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    I decide!

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  • Mallory Abroad
    Master October 2014
    Mallory Abroad ·
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    It is his wedding day as well.

    He gets to decide

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  • Ashley
    VIP September 2014
    Ashley ·
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    The groom decides. It is his day too after all.

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  • KitKatDC
    Devoted October 2013
    KitKatDC ·
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    You should let your FH decide the attire for him and the groomsmen. Your father should decide his own attire, but your father should not dress more formally than the groom.

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  • 2d Bride
    Champion October 2009
    2d Bride ·
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    Unless you are prepared to let your FMIL decide what you should wear, your father shouldn't be deciding what the groom will wear.

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  • MrsHicks
    Master June 2014
    MrsHicks ·
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    Definitely the groom's choice as it is his day too. Your father should understand and if he doesn't let him know it would be the same as your FMIL choosing what you wear. A no brainer.

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  • Lillian
    VIP November 2013
    Lillian ·
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    You and your FH

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  • Chrissy
    Expert June 2014
    Chrissy ·
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    Groom has final say over Father. No doubt. Although, my FH wanted to wear a ridiculous white tux, and that was nixed.

    A lot of people say whoever pays, decides. Is your family paying? Then you maybe have a more difficult situation. Either way, if you explain that FH won't be comfortable in a tux and wants to choose his outfit, just like you chose yours, I think your dad would come around.

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  • KristnH
    Master November 2013
    KristnH ·
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    In our relationship FH has final say on what he and the other guys wear. I'll give my opinion, as others (dad) are welcome to do, but it's his wedding too and he should look the way HE wants to. Dad already had his day.

    I don't think it's fair or right for your father to be deciding what anyone wears. He can request tuxedos, but if your FH wants the guys in suits, that should be the decision. Dad shouldn't be more dressed up than FH, and his request shouldn't be more important than FH's.

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  • CeCe
    Master May 2014
    CeCe ·
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    The groom should decide! He is getting married too and your dad should have no say. I agree with the comments about whether your FMIL got to decide what you wore?

    Also if your groom decides he wants to wear a suit then you need to sit down and talk to your dad about how it is inappropriate that he wear a tux. He should not be dressed in more formal attire than the groom

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  • Mrs. A. Fernandez
    Master August 2014
    Mrs. A. Fernandez ·
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    The groom decides.

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  • Capt&MrsMatey =)
    Expert August 2013
    Capt&MrsMatey =) ·
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    Groom, definitely. You might hafta give them parameters tho (i.e: tux vs. suit). I told FH i didn't care but i pulled a little weight with his shirt color...idk if it worked or not =P

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