when i get asked "did you set a date yet?"

Lol my parents (both separately) asked me did we have a date set when I called them to announce it. My response "Its only been 10 minutes".

That was the first question out of most of my friends and family. FH proposed in Italy. We stepped off the plane and we were already being asked that question. Why would I ever be sitting inside my hotel room researching wedding venues instead of going outside and exploring Italy. It's an innocent questions but I definitely had a "huh?" moment in my head when people asked me that within the first 7 days of being engaged, expecting a serious response lol

I don't think that you should be upset by the question. They just want to make sure that they put it on their calendar. Or they are curious or excited or just ask that question because it is the first question that people ask.

Where did you get the 9-24-16 date?

I've been dealing with that question too. We've only been engaged for a month, and I feel like people are expecting to have a wedding all planned out already. (They're excited.) I just tell people not for a few years, or around 2017, 2018. We had always talked of having a long engagement whenever he decided to propose because we want to be financially stable, and have time to save and plan without added stress of a close date. Plus we're young, we're in no rush, just enjoying life as fiancé's

I get this question on a weekly basis. I just started looking at venues this weekend and won't consider my date set until I've put a deposit down. My date says 2/11/17 but I am flexible depending on venue availability. Definitely will be around that time frame.

Change your avatar, it will help you get more responses

I agree that's an annoying question! We had an answer, because we found a venue within 2 weeks of being engaged, but I would suggest just replying with "we've got a lot going on right now, and are just enjoying being engaged" or "you'll be one of the first to know!" Something like that.

FH and I had been engaged for a year and a half before we ever set a date, so I definitely understand your experience! I would just explain the situation honestly to them. Tell them that you are in no rush to set a date and that you have found a venue that you really want and are trying to work with their scheduling. It'll dwindle down after a while, but I don't think the question ever truly goes away!

People are just excited. If you're annoyed by this question I can't imagine how you'll react when people ask you when you're going to start having babies. Because I'm sure you'll get asked that starting on your wedding day. Heck I get asked that now and I'm a little less than a year out from my wedding.

Coincidentally (I think), FH was hosting a party the day after he proposed. So, all of the guests were asking if we had set a date. My reply was, "We've only been engaged for 24 hours!"

I completely understand and it does get annoying. It was the first question a lot of people asked us when we told them as well. Like others, I was like "we've only been engaged less than 24 hours, so I don't know". I got tired of the question after a day or two, so we figured out a general date and started tell people May 2016 or October 2016. Giving a general date seemed to help a tad. It seems like most people just don't get that you need a venue to have a date.

Thanks for sharing and understanding everyone! I'll change my avatar soon. And the date I have listed is tentative. We r days away from getting that finalized (we have to partake in a lotto draw in order to get our venue ).

We initially planned on a 2 yr engagement and didn't expect to get reactions ranging for annoyed ti disappointment. It just felt overbearing for a while. We r paying for everything on our own so no, sorry mom in law, I can't just make it happen in 6 mos. Lol. We ultimately choose to make it shorter bc well, that's just how we feel now .

Thank you again, it's great to vent and get advice on here. I don't have anyone who's nearby and in my position so this site has become my go to wedding haven. O

My FH popped the question last Sunday and he is already asking what date I have in mind