When do you share the guest list with your parents?

That’s entirely up to you. I showed my mom who we invited of our family and her friends and asked if there was anyone I was missing.

Tbh the only reason i would if you've been talking to them throught making it is if they're putting in money towards it

I'll probably have my mom check over the guest list, but she doesn't even know a bunch of people I'll be inviting. It's up to you if you want to show your parents.

I don’t think my parents will see the guest list at all! It’s my wedding and my money! The family I see and care about will be invited and some random cousins who cares if they don’t care?

I am doing a "courtesy check" with my parents. They are not paying for the wedding and I more want their advice on who they/we may want/not want there. Ultimately, we'll make the final decision on the guest list and are close to finalizing now. 75 people doesn't get us too far so depending on your wedding size it may be helpful to ask only if you plan on adding a ton more people lol!

I think for me along the way I was sharing details with them. I let both parents invite a ton of people so I had to constantly work with them

I did a courtesy check with both sets of parents.
However, I didn’t share the full list with them. FH family had more ppl on the list then my family & I didn’t want to start an argument. The guests #’s are just about even now.

I didn't show the whole list to my parents, but it's basically all family and their family friends. When I started the guest list I asked them to send me their list of family members and friends to be sure I didn't forget anyone, and also made cuts from there.

We're trying to leave maybe 6–10 spots for each set of parents, so they can invite some close friends.

I would share it because I imagine your parents friends and family are excited about the wedding and will be asking your parents questions. If I were them, I wouldn’t want to be clueless if the people i was speaking with were invited or not! Plus, eventually you’re going to ask your parents to help you chase rsvp stragglers, so might as well give them insight now.

We had my FH dad and stepmother review our guest list as they have provided money towards the wedding. We also asked our mothers to review the lists just in case we had forgotten anyone.

It's up to you. If they're putting up money towards the wedding, perhaps it would be nice to share the list. If they have not contributed, you don't really have to, but could as a second set of eyes. Just have to know your crowd - will they demand additional guests that you don't want there? Will it become a power struggle? That's the kind of things I consider before asking opinions.

I don't know if my mom asked once who I was inviting, to be honest. I voluntarily showed her. It wouldn't hurt to show your parents, nothing wrong with that in my eyes

I shared the full guest list with my mom & grandma so they could make sure I wasn't missing anyone. FMIL sent her guest list to me before I finalized the total amount. We invited everyone each family requested as they're paying for everything (and I honestly love big weddings).

I don’t think anyone ever saw the final list. But we put our guestlists together in an open conversation with each side of parents, so we had already had a “I’m not missing anyone” or “do we have to invite X?” conversation.

I can't imagine why you would do this, assuming you're paying for your wedding. It can only lead to your parents wanting to make expensive additions of people you don't particularly care about (or they would already be on the list).

A lot of times when brides show their parents the guest list the parents complain and write a list of all their friends that they want the bride and groom to add and they have to explain to their parents they cannot add those friends because of budget and its an awkward conversation and gives brides a lot of stress. So I'd say its best not to show them. It'll probably come up in conversation anyway so over time they'll know who's invited

For my family it was obvious who we invited because I have a pretty small family so my parents didn't have to ask. I just let them know what family friends I invited. We told my MIL some of the guests on her side after they RSVPed. That way it was too late for her to be like oh what about these people

I never thought to do that since we’re paying for the wedding on our own.

We both did courtesy checks with all sides..even though we are not accepting money from anyone. I ended up adding a couple for my mom and FH for his. Hopefully we didn't miss anyone!

I'd say up to you! When we first started the planning process my mom wanted to at least extend and invitation to all family (even tho i didn't want to -but offered to pay for those over my budgeted guests) she gave me all their addresses and other than that she doesn't know about anyone else. I will be asking her for some advice with seating chart tho.

We're paying for our own, but I did check with my mom to make sure I didn't forget anyone!