Wheelchair- bound FMIL question re dance

The idea behind wedding traditions is to make the wedding more meaningful and more fun. They should be scrapped if they have the opposite effect. In your case, his mother can't dance and a father/daughter dance would just create drama. I'd skip both. So long as the reception is fun, guests really don't miss tend to miss any traditions that are skipped. And that's doubly true if there is an obvious reason (his mother being confined to a wheelchair) for skipping them.

My FBIL and FSIL got married in August. It was the first wedding for both. FBIL had a dance with his mom, but FSIL's father has gout and experiences a lot of pain in his feet, so he told his daughter he didn't want to dance. To replace the tradition, FSIL gave a short and sweet speech about her dad and his impact on her life. It was well-received by the guests from what I could tell, so that could be a possibility for your FH and his mom.

Love4s, my fiancé is THE most dedicated son. He would love to do something akin to that.

@love4slife Thats soo sweet I think thats an awesome idea!

I might ask his mom what she wants. If it's something she has been dreaming of his whole life, I wouldn't want to take that away from her so I would try to figure something out. If, however, she would be ok with skipping it or doing an alternative then you are good to go.

I'd do a rose presentation for the moms during the ceremony. But the bottom line is that he should ask her what would be her favorite kind of tribute.

Noelle, remember, a wedding is a joyous, family event. Guests at weddings are touched by connections of the heart, not talent shows. Can your FH dance with his wheelchair bound mother? Absolutely. Get out your Kleenex, because when you see this mom's face in reaction to the way in which her wonderful son honored her at his wedding with the mother-son dance...well, I challenge you not to tear up (and watch the guests -- they are probably more touched by this dance than they would have been if the two of them were professional dancers):

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=l2S0xeyLr1I

Copy and paste it, Noelle. It' worth it (I wish the link worked by clicking it, but it's hit and miss with youtube).

Well, that's sort of what I've been thinking: sure she can dance, just not like he and I can. :-)

Oh my goodness, sobbing over that video! I would ask your FH's mom what she'd like. Maybe she would feel uncomfortable with a dance, or maybe she already has ideas for one! I feel like communication is key here.

Ask both your FH & FMIL what they would like to do. You wouldn't want to hurt any feelings by not including them if they have something else in mind.

My fiance is a paraplegic and it has not stopped us before. We may not be all over the dance floor, but it is definitely doable. Attached photo.

Wouldn't have it any other way!

My parents have both passed, and his mother did not want to to the parent dances. We simply skipped it, along with the bridal party dance too!

I would ask FH what he wants to do. Maybe his mother wants to do the dance and is looking at songs for her dance. You just never know.

If he wants to do a dance but you don't it's totally fine. I did a dance with my dad but my DH didn't really want to do a special dance with his mom (his mom didn't really know about that wedding tradition, they ended up dancing a little during the reception though anyway). So don't feel like it will be awkward to have one parents dance but not the other.

As far as your FMIL in a wheelchair, others have given great ideas! I think it would be really sweet if she's up for it!

Hey all, I read through this thread and felt compelled to share a story about my aunt and uncle's second wedding last year. Both were injured in an automobile accent that left them with major mobility issues. At their wedding, we arranged a special wheelchair dance in addition to many other activities in which the bride and groom could actively participate with their wheelchairs. Just for the wedding, we bought a set of new wheelchairs for them from the website, Spinlife (

http://www.spinlife.com/ ) which has a wide range of wheelchairs as well as power chairs.

My friends husband’s mother broker her foot and was in a wheelchair and they still danced. It was really sweet, he wheeled her in and like turned her chair and she was waving her arms, really sweet. If FH wants to dance w his mom I think it’s definitely still doable from a wheelchair