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Expert November 2021

What would you do?

Jade, on October 28, 2019 at 9:23 PM Posted in Planning 0 12

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One of my BMs just told me that one of our mutual friends was talking very poorly about my and my wedding. She was saying I was stupid for getting married at 24 and that maybe if I waited longer I’d actually get a nice ring. I love my ring, but I feel like she insulted FH with that one and that’s what I’m most upset about. She also was saying that I was annoying for talking about my wedding a lot. I’d like to clarify now that I haven’t said a word about it to her unless she brings it up first because I know people will start to get annoyed. I try and just keep it to wedding wire lol. Anyways. What should I do? Should I talk to her or just drop it? And btw, my BM really stressed about whether or not to tell me, and I’m really happy she did.

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12 Comments

Latest activity by Catherine, on October 29, 2019 at 10:57 AM

Legend November 2019
Caytlyn · on October 28, 2019 at 9:29 PM
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I wouldn’t do anything unless she says something directly to you. Who needs the extra drama when you don’t even know for sure if it’s true?
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Expert February 2021
Reena · on October 28, 2019 at 9:40 PM
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I wouldn’t say anything either.
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Savvy October 2021
Julie · on October 28, 2019 at 9:45 PM
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I wouldn't say anything unless it continues and she really starts to throw insults. She's probably a little jealous and being hateful. Just remember this- life changes also bring changes to who your friends are. Some are friends for a season, others are for a lifetime. You're not required to invite her as a guest at your wedding if shie dislikes your wedding so much.
-Signed,
A 29 YO that only had FH spend $200 on her favorite ring and picked it out herself.
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Dedicated June 2023
Serenity · on October 28, 2019 at 11:44 PM
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I would just wait and see honestly the one that told you could be talking about you too, if she don’t want you to say anything and the other girl felt comfortable enough to talk about you in such manner. 🤷🏾‍♀️ Just doesn’t sit right with me.
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Master August 2019
Rebecca · on October 29, 2019 at 2:54 AM
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"Why are you telling me this?"
I know you say you're glad your BM told you... but why? Why does it matter what someone else says, particularly if they can't say it to your face?
Maybe it's because I'm a good 10+ years older than you, but, honestly? Whatever someone else says about my relationship/wedding is none of my business, because it's not what *I* think about my relationship/wedding.
If this young woman can't say these things to your face, and she isn't concerned with your safety/health/general well-being, then absolutely none of it matters.
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Expert November 2021
Jade · on October 29, 2019 at 9:37 AM
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Rebecca, I totally get what you’re saying! I’m glad she told me because I was considering asking the girl that was speaking badly about me to be a BM. since she is so against my engagement I obviously don’t want her as a BM lol
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Expert November 2021
Jade · on October 29, 2019 at 9:39 AM
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I thought about this too! But my BM that told me this doesn’t care if I confront the other girl. She did tell me she defended me and I trust her. Ive seen her defend other people in the past so I do not think she’d lie about that. I’m glad she told me because the girl speaking badly was a close friend and I was thinking about asking her to be a BM! Not anymore lol
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Expert October 2019
Kimberly · on October 29, 2019 at 9:53 AM
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Ignore it. Unless she comes to you specifically and says something, it's hearsay. Also, you shouldn't care if she feels this way. It's your wedding, it's your ring, it's your life. People get weird around weddings and maybe this friend of yours really isn't a friend. I'd look into your friendship with this girl over the years and see if it's worth keeping
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Master August 2019
Rebecca · on October 29, 2019 at 9:56 AM
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Ok, so she can say it to your face.
She sounds jealous, petty, and childish. Does she display this behavior in other aspects of her life?

Still, this is 2nd hand information and, essentially, gossip.
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Dedicated June 2023
Serenity · on October 29, 2019 at 10:14 AM
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Well you are going about it right. I would just remain unbothered, she sounds very jealous.
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VIP August 2021
Jennifer · on October 29, 2019 at 10:55 AM
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She is definitely jealous. I totally get why it would bother you though, what she said was really mean!!
I would take a step back and evaluate if you want someone like that not just in/at your wedding, but in your life in general. Life is too short to be spending time or energy on people who do nothing but speak ill of others when they aren't in the room!
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VIP November 2019
Catherine · on October 29, 2019 at 10:57 AM
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Screw her. don't even let her bother you! you are happy and in love. people tend to be rude and nasty to others who have what they don't have. just enjoy your planning and your beautiful day. if she has the nerve to say something at your wedding - then you handle it.
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