What to do if my father requests that my ex-step-mom not be invited

Well, if you sent stepmom a STD, you're obligated follow up with an invitation. Your father should've made his request prior to the STDs; if he didn't and you sent one to your stepmom, you need to tell your father no.

If you already sent a STD, your father is SOL.

As messy as things might get, and as upset as your dad might get, you need to send them invitations, as you've already sent them STDs.

Send the invites as planned and have them seated as far away from each other as possible. I'm sure neither of them will make a scene during a wedding. It's not about them, it's about celebrating you and your FH.

I never understand why parents can't deal with it for one damn day for the sake of their child. Tell your father you already made her aware of the wedding, and you're obligated to invite her.

You would still send her an invitation. If she feels the way your father does, she won't attend. However, your father does not have to talk to them at all.

You should probably explain to your dad that you already sent the STD, and if he had asked earlier you would have done your best to accommodate his request, but unfortunately it's too late now.

Go back to your dad and apologize for agreeing to honor his ridiculous request n the first place and tell him she's invited already. You hav a relationship with former stepmom that didn't end with their divorce. He needs to grow up and act like an adult for one afternoon if she decides to accept your invitation.

I think it's horrible for your Dad to ask you not to invite a woman who helped raise you. You divorce wives. Not parents and not children. Is he no longer close to his step daughter? I would talk to him and explain that it means a lot to have her there. Seat them far apart. Maybe he'll understand.

Too late now really....they need to adult for a day, if she even comes.

Maybe I'm an asshole but he doesn't want her there so bad, he can tell her himself.