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Savvy July 2020

What to do about the bar..?

Brittany, on October 16, 2019 at 9:04 PM Posted in Wedding Reception 0 13

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So I know it is proper etiquette to host an open bar all night. The thing is that my fiancé and I don’t drink. We are actually both 2 years sober. I have a hard time paying upwards of $5,000 for alcohol for everybody else when we don’t even drink! We were thinking of hosting beer wine and soda. Wondering if people will be understanding of this given our situation (and yes mostly everyone knows that we are sober). Some people didn’t even think we would have alcohol at all!

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13 Comments

Latest activity by Lady, on October 17, 2019 at 2:25 PM

Master May 2019
Cyndy · on October 16, 2019 at 9:21 PM
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Beer and wine is totally fine. Do what makes you and your FH comfortable.
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Dedicated October 2020
Amber · on October 16, 2019 at 9:29 PM
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My fiance and I both drink but we're only doing beer and wine. People get too sloppy with hard alcohol. Our venue allows outside alcohol so we're getting ours from totalwineandmore.com it should only cost us about $1000 for 80 people.
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VIP May 2015
KiwiDerbyBride · on October 16, 2019 at 9:33 PM
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Beer and wine is completely acceptable - go for it.
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Legend June 2019
Melle · on October 16, 2019 at 9:49 PM
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Hosting beer and wine is plenty
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Expert September 2020
Marcia · on October 16, 2019 at 9:53 PM
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We are also only doing beer and wine.
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Legend November 2019
Caytlyn · on October 16, 2019 at 10:46 PM
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Beer and wine is absolutely fine.
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Just Said Yes November 2020
Kaylee · on October 16, 2019 at 11:10 PM
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I have thought heavily on this topic! I've been a bartender for years, and while most of my friends are heavy partiers when given the chance, I also have MANY sober friends (with all different reasons), AND I come from a very religious family. That being said, while the future hubs, myself and many of our friends still drink on occasion (or more), we are all very understanding and respectful when it comes to our sober friends' personal choices -- and IMO if there is anyone on your guest list who can't be respectful of that, maybe they don't deserve to be a part of your special day! Furthermore, if you two are still going to be so awesome as to still provide beer and wine, your guests should be pretty pumped.
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Savvy July 2020
Brittany · on October 17, 2019 at 9:05 AM
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Thanks for your comment! Makes me feel a lot better!
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Master October 2019
Laura · on October 17, 2019 at 9:21 AM
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You don't have to serve it if you don't want to. The people close to you would probably understand since they know you and your FH are living sober
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Devoted July 2020
Brandi · on October 17, 2019 at 9:51 AM
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You absolutely do not have to have any alcohol at all. I've been to a wedding without liquor and, brought my own. I'm also attending a wedding in June that won't have alcohol. The wedding in June, the groom is a recovering alcoholic and prefers not to have it. So, we all will respect that. Just like the wedding I attended in 2012, they both were in a DUI accident and did not wish to serve. You don't have to serve it at all. However, if you wish or feel that you must, you can simply serve beer and wine or you can do a cash bar. It's not unheard of. You can also have a limited time for the open bar. Many venues work with you. I hope this helps.
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Legend July 2019
MrsD · on October 17, 2019 at 11:15 AM
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I think beer & wine hosted is totally fine, it's better than a cash bar or dry wedding.
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Dedicated March 2020
Holly · on October 17, 2019 at 12:52 PM
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I think you guys should do what you feel would be best. Personally, if you guys don't want to provide alcohol because you guys are sober, then I would hope that your guests would understand. If you guys just want to accommodate everyone, then I would do a cash bar. If they would like to drink, then they could pay for it. We are doing beer and wine, but we are drinking as well. I think this decision should be totally up to you guys!
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Lady · on October 17, 2019 at 2:25 PM
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Beer and wine, or no alcohol at all is totally fine. The only etiquette rule is that whatever you offer, your guests should not have to pay for.
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