What to do about people who don’t rsvp

I would text a short message (not self-deprecating because you are not a "bother"): Hi __. I haven't received your RSVP yet for my wedding. Tomorrow is the last day to give final numbers to my caterer. If I don't hear from you, I'll consider you a Decline and not reserve a seat for you. Take care. _name_"

I agree with Michelle. Don't apologize. You can reach out one last time and if they still don't respond they'll simply not be included in the headcount.

Heres what you do.... You get married at the courthouse with immediate family as witnesses. Then have a NO FOOD, BYOB reception party and save thousands of dollars. It wont cost you anything if they dont show up and the ones who show up are the only ones who matter.

The host or hosts should be the ones chasing down the non-responders. I would not put myself in that position since it makes it look as if you're throwing your own shower. If there is still no reply, she can leave a message saying that she'll have to count them as a no if she doesn't hear by a reasonable grace period. That said, caterers can often add numbers last minute, so check there as well. Showers are really meant to be more casual, intimate and low key, so in their place, even though not replying in a timely way to any event is rude, I'd try to be a bit flexible, if possible.

@Haley I would put a "like" if I could! RSVP are for head count plain and simple.

I don't know how involved this party is, or if it's way too late to cancel at this point. Showers are an optional, low key event, not an entitlement. It's gift grabby and in poor taste to throw a gift giving event in honor of yourself. If this is a done deal, at the very least I'd still have someone else follow up on those RSVPs. Have you considered the possibility that you're not getting RSVPs because some people are turned off?