So my fiance and I are fighting again, but this time we don't agree about how to address the fights.
Basically, we got in two relatively minor fights last weekend. In one, I insulted FH's friend during an argument about said friend (which I shouldn't have done), and he said that he didn't wish to continue the argument when I was in a "mood." I really don't think it was fair to him to say that I was in a mood so we couldn't talk about it, and I don't think that's how a husband should talk to a wife. In the second fight, I said something that embarrassed my fiance in front of our friends (I didn't realize it would do that, I thought it was innocent), and he spent hours later on being upset about it because he had apparently already asked me not to say this embarrassing thing in front of other people several times. However, it was an honest mistake by me, and I don't think it's fair that he made a mountain out of a molehill.
I told my fiance that I think our arguments are a big problem and that our mode of arguing is not appropriate for a marriage. I don't like being made to feel like I did something hugely wrong when I really didn't, and I don't like my fiance shutting the conversation down during a fight because he is upset. I want these problems to be completely fixed before we are married or I won't feel comfortable marrying him, even though I love him and want to marry him.
He is open to going to therapy, but he doesn't think our fights are a big problem. He thinks that because we never name-call, insult, yell, swear, belittle, condescend, etc. that we are just having normal fights that are part of a relationship. He doesn't think that my expectation to fix these issues before getting married is reasonable because he thinks we fight like a normal couple. This is my first long-term relationship, so I guess I don't have a good sample size, but these fights seem really hurtful and unfair to me.
Any advice on what we should do to get past this?