What goes on during rehearsal dinner?

If your hosting you pay. Everyone I've been to the parents have paid. You rehearse then go to eat at restaurant (ones I've been to) bride and groom give bridal party and parents thank you gifts. Relax have fun n go home.

As others have said traditionally the grooms parents pay, but that would be something that needs to be established.

What we are doing is going to rehearsal and then going back to FMIL's house and having drinks and bringing in food from somewhere.

If you have a rehearsal, you have to have a dinner that the couple pays for. Or you could skip the rehearsal, in which case you're not obligated to have a rehearsal dinner.

If you are planning on having a rehearsal dinner, start your research early because you might want to see if they have a private room and if there are any additional fees added onto reserving the private room for that night. Some restaurants will have an extra fee if it is a weekend night or have a minimum requirement that you have to meet for the overall cost. This will help having this information for budget purposes. The most economical thing my FH and I have found is Mexican food. We are having sizzling fajitas and had gone to several Mexican restaurants over the last month on our date night sir research.Everyone in our party loves Tex-Mex food so this is a winner for us!

Just jumping on this thread for a quick rehearsal question since many of you seem to have good advice on this subject. So I know the dates for those in the wedding party should get invited for the dinner. Do they (dates) get invited to the rehearsal part as well or do they meet the rest of the party just for dinner? We've got a wedding in a few months where FH is the bestman for a destination wedding. I'm just not sure if I should find alternatives to kill time for the actual rehearsal part.

Also jumping in with my own two questions:

Does it have to be the night before the wedding? Does anybody have it a couple days or a week earlier to spread out the events? (provided the attendees are local) It appeals to me to have a very low-key night before the wedding.

Is it important for it to take place at the venue?

Thanks!

@May Bride, the rehearsal dinner happens after the rehearsal. If the rehearsal is a few days before the wedding, then that's when you do the dinner. The rehearsal is usually 1-3 days before the wedding from what I've seen.

Your rehearsal/RD does not have to be at the venue. Ours will not be.

@Lil Bee, when I've been a bm, my FH didn't go to the rehearsals. He normally just met us at the RDs. I have seen some SOs attend though. Is the RD at the venue where the rehearsal is happening?

Thank you RJmargo! I think I'll try to make it 2-3 nights before the wedding.

@RJmargo, No the rehearsal dinner is elsewhere. The rehearsal and hotel are the venue. Unfortunately it seems I will just have to kill time in the room since this is in the middle of nowhere. How long do the rehearsals last? This wedding has 9 members on each side of the bridal party.

@Lil Bee, I went to one as a spouse and just hung out with other spouses and other attendees who didn't have a role until the rehearsal part was done.

ETA: The rehearsal part took about 15-20 minutes, I think. They only went through the logistics of the ceremony (E.g., "you walk down here with him and then turn to stand beside her") rather than go through any content.

@Lil Bee, since it's a DW in the middle of nowhere, I would just go to the rehearsal. As May bride said, there will be other spouses who will probably go. They usually have the bp practice walking twice and then run through the ceremony, so it should take around a half hour or so.

Thank you guys for helping! You guys rock!! Thank you OP for letting me jump on this thread. It just made no sense to start a new thread for my question.

I have been looking for Rehearsal Dinner locations for the last few weeks. It seem like no one wants to give up that much space in their restraunt on a friday night during dinner. I tried to move my rehearsal to earlier in the day around 2 but the Church couldnt do it I wish I could do it a few days before because there is way too much going on the night before my wedding to break and do a rehearsal and then a dinner and then finish everything I need to and get some sleep, UGH!!!!!

Is it rude to not only invite the wedding party? To be honest I dont really have enough in my budget for a rehearsal dinner and to add 25 additional people who are not apart of the wedding is a HUGE added expense.

Unless you're having a strict catholic church wedding or have something INCREDIBLY unique and different (like doing a choreographed number down the aisle), you really don't need a rehearsal.

The reason for the dinner is IF you are forcing your wedding party to come out the day or 2 before your wedding (often requiring them to leave work early), so they can practice walking, smiling, standing, and walking again, then you should really feed them.

But as others have said, this can be simple like ordering pizzas, or it can be super fancy, and everything in between. But don't feel obligated to have a rehearsal, especially if you have a coordinator directing people down the aisle on your wedding day.

@LilBee - generally people in the wedding party are given dates to the rehearsal dinner only when it's either a very serious partner (been together a long time, living together, married, etc.) or if it's a huge party afterwards. Also the timing will depend on where the ceremony is and who's running it. My rehearsals are anyway from 10-30 minutes, depending on how cooperative the wedding party is. But I've been involved in some church rehearsals that took over an hour.