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Sierra
Beginner September 2021

Weekday Wedding

Sierra, on January 26, 2021 at 1:10 PM Posted in Planning 0 14
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So my fiancé and I, after much research and pondering, have decided that we wanted a small ceremony (like the two of us, the officiant and our parents). We thought it would be cute to do it on 9/21/21 because we both love music and met at an EWF tribute concert he was preforming in. However, this year that date falls on a Tuesday. While it is super convenient for us as we have a smaller budget and weekday ceremonies are cheaper. We plan to say "I Do" at a botanical garden that has a great deal on week day elopements/ micro weddings.

We've discussed it with our parents, mine who live two hours away and his who live in town, and they have enthusiastically said they'd be there. We wanted to have a dinner party afterwards with about 15-20 friends at a local restaurant with a private dining room, nothing super rowdy and it conclude at about 8 or 9pm.

My question is does this seem feasible? I searched this site and others with archived posts similar to this topic and a lot of the comments say its inconvenient to get married in the middle of the week, and its rude/tacky to have a reception with people who didn't witness the ceremony. Wedding planning has been an emotional rollercoaster, even in these early stages, and I'd hate to deal with backlash for our choices.

14 Comments

Latest activity by Sierra, on January 27, 2021 at 12:14 PM
  • Meghan
    Rockstar October 2019
    Meghan ·
    • Flag

    For a small ceremony like you are describing, a weekday will be just fine. I do agree that it is rude to invite people to the reception/dinner without inviting them to the wedding. Unless of course you choose to do the dinner at a later time when Covid restrictions have loosened.

    • Reply
  • M
    Dedicated February 2021
    Melissa ·
    • Flag

    Hey there! So I'm getting married on a Tuesday (in to weeks!!!) And, so far, its been easy and no issue.

    While I would never want to be considered a rude person, I feel today's wedding etiquette is a bit extreme in some ways and I don't agree that you cant invite people to the celebration without the ceremony. Especially during the current times, planning is very unpredictable. We planned a small ceremony with basically no guests without worry of the day being cancelled or losing money; HOWEVER, the reservation for an after party can be made the week before and cancelled with no repercussions.

    I've personally found my loved ones, family and friends to be very understanding of the choice to marry privately. No guarantees everyone will be this way but those that take issue can just RSVP no to the dinner portion and leave it at that.

    • Reply
  • Biaani
    Expert May 2021
    Biaani ·
    • Flag

    What you described sounds amazing!!! I would actually love to do that lol. You're not even ending late.

    • Reply
  • Yasmine
    Rockstar October 2020
    Yasmine ·
    • Flag
    Definitely feasible. We had our minimony on 10/6/20 because that was our original anniversary date and that was a Tuesday. We had 35guests (our closest family and friends) and no one complained at all. Everyone loved it!


    I say all this to say, if you have people who truly love and support you then they will find a way to make it and be happy for you.
    • Reply
  • K
    Devoted October 2021
    Kristen ·
    • Flag
    Yes, this sounds lovely! I would be happy to attend a celebration dinner for a friend on a Tuesday.
    Since it isn’t really the same thing as the traditional large reception (dances, speeches, many relatives), personally, I don’t think you need to worry about deviating from traditional etiquette. Anyone invited to celebrate in such an intimate setting will likely be thrilled to be included (not that they won’t be a tiny bit sad not to see the ceremony!)
    • Reply
  • Sierra
    Beginner September 2021
    Sierra ·
    • Flag
    View Quoted Comment
    We have discussed planning a bigger vow renewal and reception in a few years when our budget allows and hopefully restrictions have been lifted. We’re young and in the early stages of our careers, so money is definitely a limiting factor and I have a huge family and most of his family is scattered around the country.
    • Reply
  • Michelle
    Master October 2022
    Michelle Online ·
    • Flag
    Make sure to contact all your guests to find out if they can make that date before you commit.
    • Reply
  • J
    Master 0000
    Judith ·
    • Flag
    Wedding Wire is the only place I have encountered people who think it rude to jave a smaller private wedding, with more invited for a dinner reception.
    Weekday Wedding 1
    Emily Post 17th edition
    Emily Post, Dear Abby, Letitia Baldwin, even The Knot editors etiquette books have always said it is fine. It used to be far more common, when either home or small religious weddings were more common. But a lot of people still do it. It is fine. Weekday weddings are strictly a know your crowd thing. If most of the people you want present are available on a weekday, it is fine, as is about 3 hours of dinner reception ending by 8:30, with no one traveling long distances. Go for it.

    • Reply
  • Jaime
    Savvy November 2021
    Jaime ·
    • Flag

    We are planning a weekday wedding and no one seems put out. The date we chose is special to us. We are both veterans and we loved the idea of getting married the day before Veteran's Day so we could have a longer celebration every year. I think you should do what is right for you.

    • Reply
  • Chelsea
    Devoted June 2021
    Chelsea ·
    • Flag

    Honestly, I think it sounds perfect for your situation! You clearly know that you want an intimate get together, and by the sounds of it, the people who really matter are on board!

    I got a little pushback for planning a Sunday wedding, but like you, we're ending the reception at 8pm.

    I think you'll have a great time — and it'll be meaningful!

    • Reply
  • Mrs. Spring
    Master April 2021
    Mrs. Spring ·
    • Flag
    If the guests can make it then a weekday wedding is just fine
    • Reply
  • Tee
    Dedicated October 2021
    Tee ·
    • Flag
    Sounds perfect! I’m sure it will be lovely.
    • Reply
  • Rebecca
    Rockstar August 2019
    Rebecca ·
    • Flag

    If it works for you, do it!

    While I'm normally camp, "invite to both ceremony and reception", things are a little wacky right now.

    In addition, you're doing a *family only* ceremony, which changes the whole game!

    This sounds special and very you, so make it happen!

    • Reply
  • Sierra
    Beginner September 2021
    Sierra ·
    • Flag

    Thanks ya'll! Your kind response have helped alleviate a ton of anxiety!

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