Wedding showers

Yes it is rude to invite people to the shower who are not invited to the wedding.

Yes I believe I read somewhere it’s not appropriate.


I didn’t invite any work friends, yet they threw me a work bridal shower. But this was them throwing it for me 🤷🏻‍♀️

Yes, it's rude. Only people invited to the wedding should be invited to the shower.

Yes it’s rude. Everyone on here will tell you it’s rude.

My mom's friend is throwing me a bridal shower for my small destination wedding and will be inviting some of the other friends who are not invited to the wedding because they have expressed a desire to celebrate me. It's also common on my team at work for one of our staff meetings to be a mini wedding shower for anyone on the team getting married, but that doesn't mean anyone on the team is invited.

If you or your mom is throwing the shower, then it's rude to invite people that aren't coming to the wedding. I think if someone else is throwing you a shower, then it's on them to decide what to do about the list.

View Quoted Comment In the case of a work shower or one that is hosted by another group (your house of worship, book club or whatever hobby you share with others) that is perfectly acceptable because they are aware that they are not invited to the wedding but they want to share your happiness and you are not involved in compiling the guest list. It would be equally impolite to turn that down.

Yes, it is considered very poor etiquette for exactly the reason you described.

Nearly everyone is "on a budget" for their wedding and budget is one of the biggest factors in deciding on a guest list number. Reasonable people understand that couples can't invite literally everyone they want to their wedding, for a variety of reasons. The "consolation prize" of being invited to a different event in order to give the couple a gift is not actually a consolation for anyone.

Your instinct is correct. It's rude to invite people to pre-wedding events without welcoming them to the main event too. Particularly bad with gift-giving situations, like showers. The exception is work and some church showers.

It would be rude because the shower is kind of like a pre-celebration to the wedding if that makes sense? So, just stick to who you plan on inviting to the wedding to the shower.

I didn't have any type of shower (bridal or wedding shower). I honestly didn't really care for one I guess? Instead I just splurged a little more for my bachelorette trip with my 4 girls instead.