Wedding Pay & Planning, How did you ask your parents?

I didn't ask. It's my second wedding (but his first) and my parents never dropped a dime on the first one. They at are broke. I'd rather have them put that money into their retirement fund than have them living in my basement in ten years, lol.

We didn't ask, but 3/4 sets of parents offered money. It ended up covering more than our planned budget. We got very lucky.

We didn't ask they just gave. Determined a realistic budget with my mom and dad, they asked us how much we could bring and split the rest.

Thanks for the advice. This combined with what my MOH said I have decided not to ask.

I can't remember who but in regards to having my mom dress shopping and asking for centerpieces that's almost a lost cause, b/c my mom lives 14 hour away and the plane ticket would be $300+ round trip (which me and her agree could go towards the dress), I have tried to convince my mom to join the BP's pinterest but shes not into the internet much (she doesn't have social media)... sigh.

I did not have a problem asking my Gdad because I was raised by my grandparents. Now my dad was another story I was sooo nervous. I knew he would I'm just not used to asking him for much. Both told me to get some numbers and we'd go from there so that's what I did. I guess it depends on family dynamics and things

What Celia said.... often money comes with conditions. My FH and I are paying for the entire wedding ourselves and budgeted accordingly. Because both of us were the second in our respective family to get married both parents agreed to give us the same amount they gave for our siblings. They brought it up when we were discussing budget, we never asked. Both FH and I declined the money but said if they wish to give it as a wedding gift they are more than welcome....

We just delivered the news to our parents and my future MIL just jumped in on the planning and payments since she doesn't have any daughters she was so happy to be apart she just offered and within the week presented the $$$. My dad after hearing the details and price asked how much would it cost him and my granny even offered to pay for decorations. So I

guess just let them know if they offer fine if not well just ask do they plan on helping after all its your parents you know what they can and cant affafford.

Afford

I didn't ask my parents. Both my mom and dad offered to pay for something. I don't think it's anything wrong with asking your parents for help with your wedding if that's what you want. Just don't get upset if they so no for whatever reason respect it and move on.

I come from a background where the parents save their whole lives for their daughters' wedding(s).

When time came of engagement announcement, my mom said she wanted to gift us the wedding, I'm not going crazy on planning because its not money, in fact I'm even being more price conscious because its not my money. I agree, don't ask, just tell them you're getting married and planning, and if they offer to pay, take it, if not then plan what you can afford.

I'm with you on being alone in the planning. None of my bridesmaids or family members except FH live where I live (or where my wedding will be), its hard at times, and sometimes I wish I could go wedding shopping with someone, but it is what it is...

With my parents, they offered without me asking, but that's something they'd made clear to me that they would want to do for me...they're traditional and I'm the only girl and first to get married so they graciously offered to pay for the reception (venue and catering) like my grandfather did for my Mom and Dad's wedding. The rest is on us.

For FILs, he knew they'd most likely want to contribute but they were waiting to hear what was needed to he had a talk with them and they were like "well what were you waiting for?" lol. They'll be picking up certain tabs, some of which haven't been decided yet. But for example it's tradition here for the parents of the groom to pay for the brides dress so after I found my dress they surprised me by telling me they'd be taking care of it!

Like someone else said, it's your parents, not strangers you'd be talking to. You know them best and how to approach this with them, either by waiting to hear from them or initiating a conversation. Good luck!

Don't ask. If they offer be prepared with your budget and be grateful. But don't ask because they may not be able. You're wise to budget for it yourself.

I think you announce the engagement and if they are planning to help pay, they will bring it up.

My parents are paying for the wedding, it was always just sort of understood that my parents would pay for it.

I didn't ask my parents, they inquired with me. If you don't plan to change your plans and can afford your wedding without their help, then don't ask. However, if possible keep the included in the planning talk and let them in; sometimes, this will spark the conversation on it's own.

I had my sister ask my mom if she was going to help me...yea that sounds weird but I knew my parents would help I was just too embarrassed to ask them myself. Once she told my sister she would pay for venue and food, I just invited her to go venue hunting with me. She knew my sister told me but I was able to avoid the "talk" until she awkwardly handed me the venue check. It's still awkward for me, I'm so proud to take money from people!

I didn't ask. My parents told me how they would help. My father offered to pay for my dress and he gave me the money for it. They've also promised me some money but I will put it in our savings account.

My parents offered assistance. FH's parents did not. We did not actually ask either set of parents, but we are very thankful. Something else that comes into play is that my family and FH's wanted a huge wedding, which we could not afford on our own. We've made some compromises and I think it's going to work out. They are paying for the venue/F&B and FH and I are paying for everything else.