Wedding lessons learned.... Give beginners some tips

I wish I researched a lot more on priced of things like DJ, photographer, caterer, before we decided to have a big wedding. I don't regret anything and can't wait for our wedding but I probably would have opted for a smaller wedding or eloped and had a backyard party if I knew prices beforehand.

If you have a small floral budget, be flexible with the flower types used. I see people complaining a lot on here about flowers. I didn't have a preference so my florist and I worked together to establish a look I like for a price I can afford.

Don't send STDs to people you're not 100% sure that you want to invite when the time comes. Another issues I've seen on here.

Keep track of everything. Save every email with vendors. This has helped me greatly.

DIY is not necessarily cheaper. I am not DIYing anything other than seating chart and table numbers. My MOH is doing it. People get so wrapped up in DIY decor which is totally fine but it's generally a lot of unnecessary spending.

Don't invite people out of guilt. Remember this is one day. It won't be perfect but as long as you get married, it won't matter.

I would say to focus on what the most important things are for you and your FH and agree on those first. Ours was great food, open bar and fun music. After that list the few things that you know you want like for me it was string lights because we had a terrace reception at the beach and he wanted a memory table because his parents are both gone. From there flowers and decor and the other things don’t seem to matter as much. It’s been 3 weeks since I got married and when I ask people what they remember about the day they don’t say my centerpieces or flowers or those things; they say the food was fantastic, the music was awesome and plenty of drinks....oh and the beauty venue on the beach.....so I feel like people noticed exactly what I wanted them to. That’s not to say that I didn’t stress about all of those other things every day but it I could go back I don’t think I would worry about certain things as much. And last but not least....find a good photographer because you will want to see all of those pictures that they take because you will be so busy that day and not remember a lot of it. Good luck and enjoy the planning.

I tell my friends all the time to keep it small if they can and definitely simple. we spend all this time thinking things like chair covers and detailed centerpieces are important but they don't actually make the day and no one exactly cares about it the way we think they would notice.

also, sometimes it is better just to buy things because it's already done for you rather than spending all that time DIYing. I am a DIY bride but i must say there are things i wish i would have just spent more buying to save myself some time.

One thing I overlooked was the contract details for the photographer. Luckily ours is good but I didn't realize until now how important details were like how long it takes to get back pictures and what if they can't show. So my advice; read all your vendor contracts thoroughly!

For our DW & local reception:

Nailed it: prioritized beautiful venues with essentials included (chairs, tables, choice of linens) & yummy food/drinks, did a ton of research to find professional yet affordable vendors, smallish guest lists, no wedding party, saved money on flowers because used non-floral decor and only had 1 bouquet.

Missed it: too much DIY which cost us a lot of time, stress & money, wish we chose a reception venue that matched our theme better to save on decorating time & money.

I suppose the number one thing is dont be afraid to shop around. I saved over $500 on the DJ by shopping around.

Also if a vendor isnt understanding your vision during the back and forth proposal process, dont be afraid to find another. I saved $1,200 by switching florists from the one my venue recommended.

For a dress, if you want something that isn't regularly available on a budget, don't be afraid to find a local seamstress. You might be able to purchase your own fabric and have a dress custom made for significantly less than a commercially offered dress.

if you want something and don't think the vendor offers it, ask anyway. There are many times when the vendors will offer something not normally part of their routine if you only ask even down to the color of the napkins.

Beyond all of this, I highly recommend having a clear idea of what you want for food and decorations at minimum before you start contacting vendors. So many of them will try to sell you things that do not fit your vision, especially if you are looking for a smaller, simpler wedding.

1) MAKE ABSOLUTELY POSITIVELY SURE YOUR PAPERWORK GETS FILED! I had to learn that lesson the hard way. The hard way sucks.

2) Don't let Pinterest (or any other internet inspiration) mess with your priorities! It's VERY easy to fall down that rabbit hole, but resist the urge! Wait to work on your adorable handmade wedding favors or quirky non-traditional guestbook or amazing sparkler exit plan (or any other special-but-non-essential touches) until *after* you've made sure you have your venue and vendors booked, your food and booze planned for, and confirmed there'll be enough seats for every single butt.

3) Some things will go wrong. That's ok. Try not to let those things get to you, especially on the actual wedding day. Remember that so long as your guests have a good time and you're married at the end, it's a successful wedding no matter what else happens! :-)

Thanks ladies