If I were invited to a wedding but told I couldn't bring my spouse, I wouldn't go. Maybe you can invite only your very closest coworkers (those you consider friends and hang out with outside of work) so they can bring a spouse.
View Quoted Comment
If you think they would be offended then just skip inviting them all together. Me and my coworkers are super close and they were totally fine with the set up. If you think your coworkers wouldn’t be cool with it then skip the invites all together.
Yes! If you've already invited the two to your bridal shower, they need to be invited to the wedding. Include their husbands and call it a day. Maybe just mention to them on the side that you're not inviting everyone to the wedding, so to keep their invite hush.
I don't think other people in your office would get offended, everyone understands how expensive weddings can be. But I agree with the majority, if you know the coworker has a spouse or has been in a long relationship you have to invite their plus one as well. In addition if you've hung out or got together outside of work hopefully it's not your first time meeting the spouse/significant other.
If someone is close enough to be invited to your bridal shower, then it's absolutely unacceptable to not invite their husbands to the wedding (in my opinion). I think you're in a tough position because since you invited two of your co-workers to your bridal shower, I don't see how you can't include their husbands in the wedding invite. Which means that if you exclude the husbands of the other co-workers, then feelings might get hurt. Sorry I don't have an answer on this one...
It comes down to money and who you’d rather be there. If the choice is between inviting co-worker or you MIL bowling team, that’s different. But people understand you can’t invite all. I’m close to one person on my team. If I invited my boss, etc it would add up to over 10 people. I just try and keep wedding talk to a minimum.