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niseirn

Wedding invite during pandemic

niseirn, on November 9, 2021 at 4:56 PM Posted in Family and Relationships 1 18

I'm in sort of a predicament. My husband's adult son from a former marriage of his will be getting married in Spring 2022. He and his fiancee have already postponed the wedding date once, which was supposed to be this past April due to the ongoing pandemic. They have several wedding attendants on each of the bride's and groom's side, and I surmise it will be around 100+ people due to the bride having an extensive extended family and social circle. The wedding will be held indoors (both ceremony and reception). I work as a nurse practitioner, so I am wanting to be extra cautious and don't want to attend any large events. I suppose that the pandemic may be at a turning point by Spring 2022, but my husband wants to buy air tickets now. I'm not ready to make that decision. I would say I'm not extremely close to the bride nor do I feel comfortable approaching the groom about their safety plan. I have asked my husband to find this out from them. But if it turns out that it is a 100+ guest list, outdoor nuptials and reception, and not voluntary masking, I would be very wary of attending such an event. To complicate matters further, my MIL is indirectly pressuring me to be a dutiful wife to my husband and attend the event no matter what. How are some of you handling situations like this, particularly those of you in healthcare?

18 Comments

Latest activity by P.t., on November 16, 2021 at 10:26 PM
  • H
    Master July 2019
    Hannah ·
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    I feel like there is never really a reason to book airfare this far out. It's more expensive and there's a higher risk of flights being canceled. I would just discuss the logistical issues of booking this far out regardless.
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  • niseirn
    niseirn ·
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    His son is insisting that we book now in case flights book up. I feel like they are being unreasonable and demanding about this.

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  • H
    Master July 2019
    Hannah ·
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    Where are you trying to fly from/to? Are there a limited number of flights? I have literally never heard of anyone booking a flight more than 3-4 months prior to the date.
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  • niseirn
    niseirn ·
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    Grand Rapids, MI. I have no idea. I'm not familiar with the Midwest at all.

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  • Melinda
    Expert March 2022
    Melinda ·
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    I would give them a date (say Feb 5th) of when you will book airfare by and stick by that date. It will give you more time to feel out the situation.

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  • H
    Master July 2019
    Hannah ·
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    I can't imagine that there is only 1 flight in and out of Grand Rapids, MI. It should not be an issue to book a flight, and the son needs to chill out.
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  • niseirn
    niseirn ·
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    I meant the wedding is in Grand Rapids, MI. We fly out of DCA. We have three major airports in our area!

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  • H
    Master July 2019
    Hannah ·
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    Yeah....even better. There is very little likelihood that everyone in the DCA area is going to be heading to Michigan at that time from all the airports. The son can want you to book ASAP. He can also want to win the lottery. Wanting doesn't mean things will happen.
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  • Solana
    Dedicated December 2021
    Solana ·
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    I highly doubt they will have masks. I haven’t seen one wedding that does that now. I think asking can come off rude but if you’re concerned for your safety then do not go. I think it will be a big deal to your husband, and i’m not sure there’s a way to convince him you’re doing the right thing but if you DON’T want to go, your body your choice!
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  • W
    VIP September 2020
    Willow ·
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    I'd have your husband go alone to this super spreader event. When he comes back, he should quarantine in a separate room until his test results come back.


    By spring of 2022, this may be a non issue. Or we may have a more virulent strain.
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  • Jacks
    Rockstar November 2054
    Jacks ·
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    "Dutiful wife?" Well, wow, there's a MIL problem if I ever saw one.

    It's really hard to say what Covid will be doing next spring, and I think you're being practical not to book right now. Seems like your husband isn't respecting your wishes, and that is something you need to work out with him.

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  • Krista
    Dedicated April 2020
    Krista ·
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    As what should have been an april 2020 bride I have not rescheduled my wedding as I am a covid nurse and my fiancé is a respiratory therapist. I didn’t want to put my family at risk. I did not see them or do anything with anyone. Mg family asked but I didn’t want to put them at risk. My dad died of covid in August. Part of me wishes I had taken those chances to see him, but I don’t know what I would do if it was my wedding that caused his death. I do believe that credible people putting some doubt or concern might make people think twice about safety concerns. Now that there are so many rapid rests it is so easy to test before events. That doesn’t seem like a huge ask
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  • Victoria
    Dedicated November 2022
    Victoria ·
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    You could also fly in and out of Detroit and drive to Grand Rapids. It’s about a 2.5 hour drive (ik it’s not ideal, but it’s another option). Grand Rapids’s airport isn’t as big as Detroit but it’s busy and not a little dinky propeller plane spot. You should have NO issues finding a flight. It’s absurd he wants you to book now!
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  • KYLIE
    Super May 2019
    KYLIE ·
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    There is no reason to book a flight now, COVID times or not. Evaluate at 60 days out, the normal time to book a flight during a non-peak holiday time.
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  • Samantha
    Super May 2022
    Samantha ·
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    Grand Rapids is my home airport, and there are TONS of flights in and out of there. It won't sell out. But regardless, its an event I would not want to miss or make my husband experience without me, so I would go, wear my mask, stay away from people as much as possible, wash hands, etc.

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  • P.t.
    Dedicated December 2022
    P.t. ·
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    The area you are traveling from has plenty of airports and flights. I don’t think there is a rush to get a ticket now. My parents just went to a wedding and the couple was very strict with their rules. The bride is a nurse like me and she had temperature checks, vaccine card checks, social distancing, and everyone had to wear a mask unless they were eating or drinking. Everyone followed through nicely. Even when people were dancing, they had their mask on. I’m thinking about taking some of her ideas. As far as being a dutiful wife…I have seen some pretty ugly and scary things during this pandemic. The trauma of this pandemic has caused me to see things differently. At the end of the day, you have to do what you are comfortable with.
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  • niseirn
    niseirn ·
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    Thanks all for the comments. My husband finally found out from his son how many people will be at the wedding. Between 100-130 total. And it will be indoors. I told my husband that I would go if it were 50 people, but 100+ is way out of my comfort zone.

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  • P.t.
    Dedicated December 2022
    P.t. ·
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    Wow. That’s a lot of people in an indoor space for an event during the pandemic. Like I said, you have to do what is best for you. I’m sure hubby is going and I hope he will be safe. Might be kind of hard to socially distance though.
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