I'm getting married in September and my parents are paying for about 90% of the wedding. My mother and I are in disagreement on how we should word the invitations, specifically her and my father's title. My mom wants the wording to be very formal and follow traditional wedding etiquette, as she says that they are paying for the wedding and are the ones "doing the inviting". Thus she wants the wording to be:
"Mr. and Mrs. Raymond Kelly request the pleasure of your company...etc"
Where as I think this is a bit sexist to be only referred to by your husband's name and I would like her name to be included so it reads as:
"Mr. and Mrs. Raymond and Marie Kelly request the pleasure of your company...etc."
But she is adamant that this is an incredible offense and would cause her crippling embarrassment from her more etiquette-savy friends whom she is inviting...
I am frustrated because I thought we were a slightly more modern family who does not feel bound to archaic societal rules. We're having a fairly casual, non-religious wedding and would consider ourselves comfortably middle class, and I didn't think we associated with anyone who would really care whether or not our invitations followed strict traditional guidelines.
I know we're both being stubborn, but am I being irrational in my desire to have her first name included in the invite or is she being unreasonably antiquated in her insistence on being referred to by her husband's name, because that is what old-fashioned etiquette demands and she is footing the bill?
(My mother literally told me I was breaking her heart with my "tacky" wording preferences and is threatening to remove me from the family cell phone plan, which I pay for but remain on the plan for the lower family rate)
