Wedding Gap Timeline

I don't think it's a regional thing; it's more of a "I want what I want" thing. If you want a church ceremony and it has to end at 2:00; you schedule a 2:30/3:00 reception start. We have plenty of venues here that do 3:00 or 3:30 starts.

I think it's a mixture of location and religion. I've been to many (and am having) a Catholic wedding in Louisiana and have never heard of a gap. Our ceremony doesn't start til 7pm.

Nope. I'm Catholic and I've never been to a ridiculous gap like that

@Celia our venue didn't have an option to do an earlier start time. We paid an extra $300 just to get them to start 15 min earlier. And they wouldn't push it anymore.

I'm honestly not trying to be rude, and none of this is "I want what I want". We exhausted every option, and this was the absolute best we could come up with. While I agree not everyone will do this, I do think most people try to figure something out, and often just aren't able to.

I've been in 7 weddings, and all of them had a gap of at least 3 hours. Maybe it's a Midwest thing.

All of the weddings that I've been to with a gap were because of what time the church was available compared to the reception start time.

PERSONALLY - I don't mind a gap of 1 - 1.5 hours or less. Getting out of the church, driving, parking, etc. can take up some time where I won't mind sitting around for a few minutes. But I know I'm in the minority on that one. My wedding didn't have a gap because it was all in the same place.

I don't like gaps any longer than 1.5 hours, and I've been to two weddings where this happened. The first was because of a church wedding and the gap was about 3 hours. We went to someone's house and I got so drunk before the cocktail hour that by the time it was dinner I was beyond buzzed. Learned my lesson there.

Second time was a wedding that I was in where the couple didn't want to do a first look and we had to drive to 3 different locations for photos (and they were not close together AT ALL). I honestly thought this was so rude, especially because they didn't even have a lot of bridal party photos. So the bridal party ended up sitting on a trolley while they took all these pictures.

So I guess, in my unnecessarily verbose response, is that I'll conditionally accept a gap.

I live in the northeast too and most weddings, except one, I've been to have a gap of 2 - 4 hours unless the reception is at the same place as the wedding.

Granted I prefer no gap but they're very common where I am

As frowned upon as it is every wedding ive been to has had a gap and so will mine. Its not something thats bothered me because its what im used to. And yes it will be a catholic wedding.

I'm in NY. It's definitely not a location thing. The only weddings I've gone to that had a gap were at churches. The only reason I never thought it was rude before joining WW is because either my home or hotel were right nearby (or i was in the wedding party). But after attending a wedding for the first time where everything was in one place, and walking immediately from the ceremony to cocktail hour, I fell in love with that format and have loved those types of weddings ever since. That's exactly how we're planning our wedding day now.

I went to a Catholic wedding with a 4 hour gap. It honestly wasn't a big deal. I went out exploring with other friends, we were all traveling for the wedding, and then went to the reception. I'm used to wandering around new places and exploring.

4 hours is super long. UO but I don't mind gaps that 1.5 hours or less. Ours was a Catholic Mass and we had about an hour gap between the end of the ceremony and the start of cocktail hour. As guests, H and I typically use that time to check into the hotel, freshen up, and then head over to the cocktail hour. It really doesn't bother me.

I've been to Long Island weddings with that big a gap. They were all Catholic masses. I personally don't mind it even though I was an OOT...someone in the family always had a little pit stop at their house for cookies, coffee, light apps before heading over for the reception. I don't understand it myself and I'm not *doing* that.

It has been explained to me that in many Catholic Long Island circles, people go to the church in regular casual church wear or even work clothes if it's a Friday afternoon affair and then go home and change for the big shindig at night. All the while, the BP is taking pictures again. It's not the norm where I'm from- but it is some folks' norm. I've seen it myself.

Thanks everyone for your input! I was just really curious how that worked in other areas.

It's a religious thing. They don't have any flexibility on ceremony times. My guests will have an hour gap because I paid more to have a longer HH...but it's not unusual for 3 hours to be in between. Most people hit the hotel bar and have fun.

I'm from a Catholic famy from Long island and I've never had a gap at a wedding, except driving time to the reception site.

I will have a gap so that my bridal party and family may take pictures but I'm going to be hungry so I'll probably try and keep the gap no more than 30 minutes. During that time the dj will play music for our guest, we will have food for them to start eating, and fun things to keep them busy at the table.

I've never been to a wedding with a gap, but I've also never been to a Catholic wedding. I don't understand the excuse that people would need to "freshen up" or relax between the ceremony and reception. All I'm doing during a ceremony is sitting for 15-45 min. I don't need to recover from that. I also wouldn't want to sit around in my dress clothes waiting, or change out of my nice clothes to wander around a city then have to change back into nice clothes to attend the reception.

The only weddings I've been to with gaps have been where the ceremony and reception are at different places, when they are at the same place, there has never been a gap. I understand the gap when they are in 2 locations to give people time to get to a new location and because many churches only have certain times for services. We are having a gap because the latest our church will perform a wedding is 3 since they have a 4:00 PM mass and the earliest our reception venue will start is 5:00 PM so we figure our guests will have 1.5 hour gap. However, over half of our guests are OOT and very few of them will be coming the night before and hotel check in is at 3, so most of our guests will be using that gap to check into their hotel.

Honestly I have been to a lot of weddings that have the gap(catholic). So we skip the ceremony. Why get all dressed up for a 1pm service, go home and sit there and wait till 6 for the reception. Especially the weddings that my kids were invited to(I only took them to 1). They were cranky and bored out of their minds. Pool they couldn't use because mom didn't want to go swimming with them. We ended up leaving super early and decided after that to pick one or the other to attend.

ETA-its also REALLY expensive and difficult to get a sitter for that long. And what sitter is going to babysit for an hour and half and then leave and come back.

I have never been to a wedding with a gap. I have a feeling it has a lot to do with people having church ceremonies but wanting to have a reception at night. Incredibly selfish and rude. If I were invited to a wedding with a gap I'd skip the ceremony and just go to the reception. There's no way I'd want to get all dressed up and then just sit around for 4 hours. If you really want that church wedding then you have a daytime reception. End of story.