Wedding Dress/eloping

In general, I’m not a fan of gifts with strings, but oof…I do think it wasn’t kind to accept that money and time knowing your mom won’t see you get married in your dress. The reception really isn’t a replacement since you might find after you’re married that you don’t want a big party to plan, and it’s not the same as the ceremony anyway. I’d immediately pay your parents back, and if you’re not planning on telling them until after you elope, working on a heartfelt way to convey how much you appreciated your mom’s time and energy being a part of your day even if she wasn’t allowed to physically be at the ceremony.

Hey Kiersten,


I do think it wasn't the best decision to accept the dress without at least letting your parents know that you no longer plan to have a wedding. I also think that if you felt compelled to ask in here, you might feel thar as well.
Maybe call and let them know?

Is there a specific reason you haven’t told your parents you’re eloping? While I definitely don’t think gifts should come with strings, I do think you should have been honest about your plans before accepting such a large gift.

I think it might be honorable to frontload to them that you’re planning to elope so that they’re not blindsided. I think she can get secret is not a good idea.