When I started planning my wedding I was told that you always lose someone out of your life because of your wedding. It could be a family member or a friend. I didn’t believe it until I lost 2 friends in my planning process. One was because she was named my maid of honor and the other was her lack of participation. I have talked to plenty of married women and the majority of them have told me they also have lost friends or family members during their wedding. Do you ladies believe this and have you lost anyone during your process?
I've been engaged for almost 2 years and I asked my bridesmaids/ MOH very early on in my engagement. Since then we have drifted apart and do not talk as often but I don't think I have lost them. All of them are still 100% for being in the wedding as well as the events coming up soon such as my bachelorette party and shower. However, I do feel like after the wedding is over they will continue to drift away to the point of losing them because our only conversations anymore revolve around the wedding.
I just made a post about this (kind of!) I haven't asked anyone to be in my bridal party yet, but the person I had planned on being my MOH, my best friend of over 10 years and I are currently not talking and this happened literally weeks after my engagement. It definitely stinks because this is something we have always talked about. We'll see if anything changes by the time I do actually ask my wedding party.
I do not think I am going to lose any friends, but I definitely see a strain with one of my bridesmaids. I think that once it is all over, it will go back to normal. She is dealing with a lot of stress from work and stuff. I have given her the option of stepping down if she feels like it is too much because I value her friendship and the last thing I want is for her to feel obligated to be a part of it this far into the process. I told her that I rather have her as a friend than anything happen to our friendship and that I would not be mad if she took the out. I also stressed that in no way was I kicking her out, but there have a been a couple of times where she voiced stress for the wedding so I wanted to let her know that it was okay.
I’ve been married almost 8 months and nothing changed with my relationships with any of my guests or 10 bridesmaids. The only thing that changed is relationships with some family members because we had previously let people walk all over us when we shouldn’t have. So we have gotten better at standing up for ourselves.
I never thought people would change during this whole wedding planning process. One of my best friends of over 25 years has stopped talking to me because I chose my sister to be my MOH over her! Selfish much?
Sad to say Tynesha but it's true. Sometimes you lose people even before the wedding planning begins. I lost a friend of over 35 years when I started seeing my FH exclusively. His niece stopped talking to me over something real petty. But you know how I look at it? Four fewer people on my guest list. Make lemonade from lemons! If they don't want to be supportive of you and your FH, then let them be. Congrats on your upcoming nuptials!!
Thankfully I don't have friends on this state and my few friends are too far to make it to my wedding. Family is just the same, and they aren't so involved but my parents. I have a few family members that I might have falling off with but in the end family always come back. So don't worry, you might lose you might gain but don't burn bridges because of your wedding. Just let it run its course. Congrats and good luck!
No, but my bridal party is mostly family other than my bf since middle school who I know is not going anywhere! But I'm sorry your going through that, it definitely sucks!
Yes actually! I didn’t know this was a common issue. My MOH aka my “best friend” didn’t want to participate in anything having to do with my wedding. When I approached her about it it got ugly fast. Needless to say I now have a new MOH and saw my Ex best friends TRUE colors. So sorry you had to go through this too.
Yup... lost my maid of honor who was also my cousin. I’m an only child and so was she. We were best friends (pretty much sisters) growing up and had a big disagreement that tore us apart and we haven’t talked since. It’s been 3 months.
My cousin's wife. She has behaved in a childish and manipulative manner about my wedding, but she's not nice to my cousin's family anyway. She never gave me the chance to get close to her, so I guess I never really lost her. She did hurt me though.
Girl I’m sorry to hear that you’re going through that ,but its so true I got married in March and I lost 4 best friends their true colors came out the moment I got engaged to be married . they felt some type way, they started acting shady and we part ways. that right there show me where We stood as friends . It was sad to loose them but I don’t need fake people around me.. so with that being said keep on with ur plans and don’t worry about others. Best wishes and Congratulations on your wedding
FH's great grandmother passed away just a few months before we got engaged
My great uncle passed away a couple month ago
FH's aunt passed away a few weeks ago
FH's grandfather had a couple heart attacks and we almost lost him (thank God he has made nearly a full recovery)
My grandfather has gotten worse and worse pretty much daily. if he lives till my wedding in 3 weeks I know he won't be able to make it to my wedding.
but I don't believe any of this is a curse. Family and friends die. sometimes its their time and others it is a freak accident. Also tensions rise and sometimes brides treat their friends and family poorly or are treated poorly during a high stress time. people snap and make decisions to disconnect. it isn't a curse but rather decisions made and actions taken.
I haven't experienced this but I honestly feel it coming. I haven't talked to a few of my bridal party members as much and one of my best friends isn't in my wedding and doesn't know yet. My family has been so selfish in a sense as well I feel - It sucks but we will see I hope everyone can just enjoy the day but sorry that happened.